THAT PARIS WEEKEND
by Mmlikestowrite
Summary: Donna is heading for a romantic weekend away with the handsome Thomas Kessler, but Harvey has other plans. Can an unexpected series of events help Donna and Harvey talk through thirteen year's worth of issues? I don't own the Suits characters but I love them. Credit goes to the show writers for these amazing characters.
1. Chapter 1

" _SNAP!_ "

The sound of the seatbelt clicking into place echoes across the airplane cabin like a starter's pistol. This is it. A new beginning. The chance for Donna to finally move on and focus on a future with Thomas. For the first time in what has felt like forever, she's excited about what might blossom with this new man. Professionally, her role as the firm's COO is going great, but after attending Mike and Rachel's wedding she's realizes it's not enough. As much as she enjoys pulling rabbits out of hats for everyone else, she longs for a little magic in her own life. Someone to love, to wake up with and to kiss goodnight.

If she were honest about it, she'd admit that space has always been reserved for Harvey. No one has ever come close to affecting her the way he has. Yes, she's tried to make it work with other men, but when it came right down to it, she could live without them, and for some reason or another, Harvey has always managed to find his way into those relationships. Those poor guys never stood a chance. And that's been infuriating.

Over the last 13 years, Donna has tried to bury these feelings for Harvey. God knows she's tried. Her rule about not dating coworkers certainly created a line in the sand, but even the great Donna Paulsen has haver been able to talk her way out of those feelings. Butterflies whenever he gets too close. The tingling of her skin when they accidentally touch. A stirring deep within her when he whispers in a voice reserved only for her. It's always been him, despite her daytime rationalizations that he would never be ready, or that she was better off. When the day is done, and she settles into sleep, her dreams always force the truth. Every damn night.

Thomas Kessler has real potential, and she actually believes they could make a go of it. Like most other middle-aged men she's met, he has a past– divorced from his high school sweetheart after 15 years of marriage. But unlike the others, he doesn't bear the scars of a failed relationship, and it clearly hasn't prevented him from being open to love. Thomas is easy to be with.

Sure, there are no butterflies, not even when he leans in for a kiss, but she doesn't care. There is also no hurt, and Donna is tired of feeling hurt. The last round with Harvey and that horrible therapist nearly did her in.

Donna realizes that the good men have been getting harder and harder to find, and Thomas has a lot to offer a woman like her. He's completely handsome – tall and fit with dark, wavy hair, intense blue-gray eyes and a sexy smile. He's also charming, successful and, most importantly, he knows what he wants. This is what Donna finds most appealing. When she's with him, she's never had to read between the lines. _That_ is a welcome change.

While she is "Donna" to everyone else, she's "Sunshine" to him. That, too, is a welcome change. It's nice to be with a man whose problems she doesn't need to solve, who sees her as more than being "Donna", and all the expectations that come with that.

"Why Sunshine?" she once asked.

"Because you've lit up my life, and I haven't been the same since." The words just rolled off his tongue as if admitting his feelings was the most natural thing in the world.

"Pace yourself, hotshot," she replied, feeling a little overwhelmed at his directness. "Even sunshine burns when you get too much!"

"Sign me up for a good scorching then!" he said, leaving no doubt about his intentions.

Donna giggles at the memory of this exchange. Adjusting herself in the plush, first-class seat, she wonders if she's had it wrong all these years.

 _Maybe it's supposed to be this easy when it's meant to work out_.

Donna knows that Harvey is aware of her new relationship. Thomas has been a long-time client of the firm, and while Harvey doesn't directly represent him, she knows they've crossed paths at corporate events. But just like every other time someone special has come along, Harvey simply offers the standard, "I'm happy for you, Donna."

She wonders if these words taste like poison to him the way they do to her when she forces them out. Her most recent attempt being after learning about that horrible therapist (she'll never mentioned her name again). Donna all but choked on those words then. In the end, she just couldn't do it, and had to come clean to Harvey. It sucked. She sucked and she's tired of this, a small piece of her heart breaking every time she acts the part.

Harvey is no different when she mentions her upcoming trip and the time off she' taking. He doesn't even look up from the document he's working on.

"No problem" he mumbles. "Have fun." No questions. No emotion. All business.

But what does she really expect to get out of him after all this time? They've been doing this dance forever. They could probably do it blindfolded without missing a step.

Even if it bothers Harvey, which he's only ever admitted to once, when she was with Stephen, it's never been enough for him to act on.

Harvey's always maintained he doesn't want more with her, even after Donna put it all out there with a kiss. _More_ was with Scottie or most recently, with that horrible woman. As close as she and Harvey have been, she needs to admit to herself that he just doesn't see _more_ with her.

 _Maybe the problem isn't the truth_. _Maybe it's my unwillingness to accept it._

With this realization, Donna lets out a defeated sigh. It's time to stop playing the fool, she tells herself.

Talking with Louis about her personal life is a different story. He is her biggest fan and takes every opportunity to tell her how lucky Thomas is. In fact, he and Sheila were the first to invite them over for dinner, which Donna really appreciated. For all his wackiness, Louis has always had her best interest at heart.

"In order to move forward, you have to leave some things behind," he told her last week during lunch. "I wouldn't be with Sheila if it had worked out with Tara. Now I'm grateful it didn't. When Tara left, you told me that 'things turn out like they're supposed to'. You need to trust in that too."

It's true, she's been quick to hand out these sorts of platitudes to Rachel, Mike and even Louis over the years. Maybe it's high time she follows her own advice.

As the flight attendants complete their final cabin check before take-off, Donna powers down her phone and turns her thoughts to Thomas. They met at a corporate event, and by the end of the evening, he had planned their first date – a picnic and Shakespeare in the park. Since then, they've found a comfortable routine of romantic dinners, spontaneous sleepovers and, when he isn't traveling, weekends camped out at her apartment watching movies and ordering take-out.

And the sex? It's fantastic. Thomas is not only affectionate but adventurous, and as she had confided in Rachel, _very_ generous when it comes to pleasing her. Falling asleep on his chest and waking up to a soft kiss with his muscular arms wrapped around her, is pretty much the best thing she's felt in a while.

Donna also appreciates how much Thomas respects her career and dedication to her work family. Even with their busy schedules, they text often and manage to see each other a couple of times a week. She's stayed at his new condo a few times, but he mostly comes to her as her workday ends before his.

It's been refreshing for Donna to be with someone who values her work as much as his own. So when he invites her to join him for a work event in Paris, it's an adventure she gladly welcomes.

"It will be a great networking opportunity for you, too," he encourages. "Who knows where it might lead."

It's perfect. She gets to see him in action and they will also have a few days to enjoy one of the most romantic cities in the world. It's a chance to escape New York, and get to know one another away from the prying eyes in the city.

To make the most of it, Donna decides to go a few days earlier to explore Paris on her own. She'll save seeing all the tourist attractions with Thomas, but with two full days to herself, she plans to visit the flagship Hermès store and the many high-fashion designer boutiques in the Saint-Germain-des-Pres district.

With the sun setting outside her window, and her plane taxiing down the runway, Donna closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. It's time for a new mantra, she says to herself.

 _I need to let you go, Harvey. We both need to move on and I need to accept this._

As the plane takes flight, rumbling and rocking, Donna sighs. She wipes the tear rolling down her cheek and watches as the twinkling lights of the Manhattan skyline slowly fade from view.

 _Time for a new beginning. Move forward and leave some things behind._

The seven-hour flight leaves Donna plenty of time to think and to drink. Red wine is flowing in first-class, but she is determined to keep her Harvey thoughts and her alcohol consumption to a minimum, knowing nothing good will come from that mix.

She chuckles to herself, remembering how Harvey once called her a philosopher. It's funny he thinks that, since she hasn't felt too smart lately. Especially when it comes to him.

Part of her likes that he needs her. She's been his emotional compass, his problem solver and his confidante. She's also been so desperately in love with him for so long that she's never allowed herself to truly explore happiness with anyone else.

 _Enough is enough_ , she tells herself. _Thirteen years is more than enough._

As for Thomas, every day she spends with him brings her heart a little closer to the possibility of a real future. And it feels good.

Moving forward with Thomas means making peace with the past. And that begins with Paris.


	2. Chapter 2

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 2**

"Are you one hundred per cent certain about this?" Harvey asks. "I need to be completely sure."

"Without a doubt," Vanessa replies as she hands over the yellow manila envelope. "And it's all here – names, pictures, travel details, the addresses of the city condo and house in Connecticut. "

Vanessa has known Harvey for a long time. They've worked together on many cases, but she has never seen the worry on his face like she has tonight.

"In fact… I'd say he's no amateur," she adds. "He's done this before."

"Fuck."

With his jaw tense and shoulders slumped, Harvey looks down before letting out a sigh. He pulls a thick white envelope from his jacket pocket and discreetly passes it across the table. It's glum in this corner of the bar. The entire place has a stench of sadness – a tangy mix of old booze, tobacco and broken dreams. It's definitely not Harvey's style which is exactly why he's here. There would be no colleagues nor clients to bump into. This is personal and he wants to make sure it stays that way.

Getting up to leave, Vanessa pats him on the shoulder. "Good luck with this one, Harvey."

"Thanks." With a small nod, he purses his lips and exhales, "Now comes the hard part."

Grabbing his raincoat and the manila envelope, Harvey steps outside, relishing the cool, wet air that clears his face and lungs. He feels dirty. He knows what's coming, it has to be done. He'll rip the band-aid off quickly and hopefully, one day, she'll forgive him.

Standing outside the bar, he tries Donna's phone once, twice and then a third time. It goes to her out-of-office message.

" _You've reached the voicemail of Donna Paulsen, Chief Operating Officer at Zane Specter Litt. I will be away from the office, returning on Tuesday, June 11. Please leave a message and I will get back to you at that time. If this is urgent, press one to connect with my assistant James Peterson. Thanks and have a great day!"_

As Harvey listens, his stomach turns. There is a lightness in her voice that he has not heard in a long time. She's flying out tonight. In fact, he's been counting down the days until she was to leave, and dreading what this relationship might become during her time away. Thomas will certainly sweep her off her feet and show her the love she deserves, the kind Harvey has never been able to fully express… and that would be it.

He closes his eyes, massaging them with his thumb and forefinger. The truth is going to hit Donna hard, but he can't bring himself to think about that. She deserves to know.

Harvey takes a cab back to the firm on the off chance she might still be there. Not that he has any idea what he would say, but he'd try.

Rain is pelting the cab window, and Harvey's eyes are also damp. Since Donna has become COO, he's built a resistance to the ache of missing her, but every now and then the feeling rears its ugly head. Tonight is one of those nights. They no longer talk late into the night and their after-work drinks are a thing of the past.

Then he thinks about _the kiss_. In that one moment, she turned his world upside down. Ever since, he's been angry and hopeful and terrified and so very much in love.

That night when she reached for him, it made his head spin. They both know he kissed her back, but days later she spat it out, "I didn't feel anything when I kissed you Harvey, so you can relax, if that's what you're worried about."

What she doesn't know is that kiss and those angry words have lived with him ever since. It's been months now, but late at night, in the quietest moments, he can still feel her soft mouth on his, her warm fingertips tickling the hairs on the back of his neck. And then he tells himself that it wasn't about him or them. It was about her and what she now realizes she doesn't want.

With that asshole Thomas now in the picture, they've grown even further apart, interacting only when necessary. Any information about Donna's personal life comes in bits from Louis and Samantha. This is their new normal. But at least she is still at the firm, so Harvey grasps at any little piece of her that he can.

He finds comfort in hearing the familiar click of her heels when she walks past each morning. The sound is like a heartbeat reminding him he is still alive. There is the lingering smell of her perfume from those rare times she comes to him for his signature. And then there is his coffee with vanilla. With every sip, she fills his senses.

As the taxi slices across the wet pavement, it dawns on Harvey that, until now, he thought Donna leaving the firm would be the thing that would break him. Boy, was he wrong. Working with her every day, and watching her build a life with someone else is actually more painful than he could have ever imagined.

Frustrated with himself, he shakes his head and loosens his tie.

 _I'm such a fucking idiot_.

As he makes his way down the firm's corridor, Harvey can already tell that Donna's office is dark. He fully intends to head back to his corner, but he can't make himself leave. Slowly opening the glass door, he steps towards her desk and turns on the lamp. It's so quiet that he can hear his heart pulsing. Pulling back her chair, he sits down, and traces the room with his eyes.

Harvey has never really taken the time to appreciate how lovely Donna's space is, probably because he's been too busy resenting her for leaving him. She's decorated with calm blues and greens, adding a pop of orange here and there. It reflects her perfectly – caring, friendly and unpredictable.

 _God. It even smells like her in here._

Running his hands across its cool top, her desk is as organized as he expects it to be.

"Everything in its place _now_ means more time for drinks _later_." She would playfully remind him.

On the left, her notebooks are neatly stacked according to color and size. Next to them is a floral mug that contains those ridiculous multicolored pens she insists on using. It brings a sad smile to his face as he remembers how he once made fun of them.

"Four pens in one! It's not my problem if you can't get behind a great idea," she'd said in her defense, teasing him back with a nibble of the pen top. "And I'm sure the person who invented them is doing just fine with the billions made from this _terrible_ idea…Wait!… Do you think he's single?"

"How do you know it was a man?" he challenged.

"Ooooh, do you think _she's_ single?" she countered, dragging out the _she_ , and offering a mischievous smile.

Harvey chuckles out loud at this past exchange. Rubbing his face with his hands, he wipes away what is left of his smile.

 _Only Donna could make a conversation about office supplies so memorable… and such a turn on._

Her file folders are color-coded according to client, and there are three ready to go for her first day back. Harvey is happy to see she still has the paperweight from their time at the DA's office. Quoting Shakespeare, it says, "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers."

Donna has always maintained that Harvey is a terrible gift giver, but when he found this during a business trip, he knew it was a home run. He kept it in his sock drawer for months, staring at it every morning, until he could surprise her on her birthday.

Looking across to the far right corner of her desk, he sees a small white vase tied with a bright yellow ribbon. The vase holds a single yellow rose and from the ribbon dangles a gold Eiffel Tower charm. The card propped alongside reads, "Bonjour, Sunshine! See you Friday! - T xoxo".

 _Yellow? And Donna doesn't even like roses._

But there it is. She's slipping away. Harvey's face is getting hot and his heart starts racing. The last time he felt this way, he was told they were panic attacks. Whatever. As far as he's concerned, it's the feeling of heartbreak mixed with regret.

If he could just go back to that night he told her he loved her… he would do it all so differently.

With an angry sigh, Harvey abruptly pushes himself away from the desk, the jolt nearly tipping the vase. He grabs the envelope, turns off the light and heads for his office. Tearing it open as he walks, he pulls out the file and stops to examine the photos under the dim corridor lights.

"You bastard," he mutters, shaking his head.


	3. Chapter 3

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 3**

Morning in Paris. Donna can never get used to the surreal experience of flying. One minute she's signing documents at the office, and a few hours later, she's feeling fabulous in a fabulous city surrounded by fabulous people.

It's her first time in Paris. She was far too excited to completely rest on the flight, but she did manage a couple of hours. Thomas had already arranged for a car service to take her to Le Bristol Paris. Based on the pictures she saw online, it's a gorgeous hotel, just steps away from the best that Paris has to offer.

With her suitcase rolling along behind, Donna enters the 'Arrivals' area and searches for her driver. She spies a bright yellow sign and starts giggling – "Ms. Donna Sunshine."

 _Very funny, Thomas_.

Donna has to admit, it's been just over two months of dating and she can feel herself falling, especially when he does charming things like this. As she settles into the Town Car, she turns on her phone. A late-night text from Thomas and three missed calls from Harvey.

Determined to break from her old habits, Donna intentionally reads Thomas's message _first_ , before reviewing the rest.

 _No voicemails. Harvey probably just pocket-dialed me. If it's anything else, he can wait_.

xxx

It's six thirty in the morning and Harvey finds himself outside the new Upper East Side condo building. The traffic noise is kicking into high gear and it's an assault on his senses. Wearing a grey power suit and black tie, Harvey leans against the building's polished façade, the manila envelope under one arm.

The early morning air is cool, revealing puffs of his short, nervous breaths. He's already downed one coffee but he definitely needs more. Sleep was out of the question last night, as intimate snapshots of Donna and Thomas rattled his brain.

Until now, Harvey knew very little about Donna's new man, except for seeing him in action at corporate events. Harvey read him to be a bit of a player, but his billables were high, so he never gave it much thought.

Thomas's attractiveness, however, had certainly gotten the attention of the firm's female staff. One time, in the kitchen, he and Mike caught Rachel and Katrina gossiping about "the totally hot Thomas Kessler". The handsome man certainly played it up when he came by, charming his way through the office, and leaving the ladies with the impression that each and every one of them could have him if they wanted. Harvey couldn't fault him for that, though. The guy was recently single. And Harvey, himself, has charmed his way into closing a few deals, including with more than a few women.

Several years ago, the firm helped Thomas with his messy divorce settlement. It was rumoured his marriage ended as the result of an affair that produced a child. Harvey wasn't surprised to hear that since every rich guy getting divorced in New York is accused of infidelity. So he took the office gossip with a grain salt. The entire thing also went down around the time Mike was facing prison and needless to say, Harvey was focused solely on that.

But now Donna was involved and that changed everything. Harvey knew Donna and Thomas were sleeping together after he saw them at a fundraiser nearly two months ago. She was discreet, but Harvey could tell, and it more than bothered him. It drove him crazy. It still does, and last night's pictures didn't help.

 _Why him, Donna? He doesn't deserve you._

Harvey is surprised Donna would even consider a guy like Thomas, especially since she's always had a talent for reading smooth-talking players like him... and then Stephen Huntley comes to mind.

 _Maybe she doesn't?_

Looking at the manila envelope, Harvey lets out a long sigh. He knows everything there is to know about Mr. Thomas Kessler now, and he's no fan.

Within minutes, the tall, impeccably dressed man exits the building's revolving door.

"Thomas Kessler." Harvey calls, his left leg bent against the building. He pushes himself away as Thomas turns to face him.

"Nice to see you, Harvey. How's our lovely friend, Donna, doing these days?"

 _Friend? What the hell? These assholes are all the same._

"Not a social visit, Thomas, so I'm going to get straight to the point," he says, taking a determined step towards him. "I know Donna is more than your _friend_. I also know your wife is not going to be too happy about it when she finds out."

Stunned, Thomas steps back. His left hand fiddling with the ring deep in his pocket. "Excuse me? You know your firm represented me in my divorce settlement, right? Donna knows that too… and my personal life is none of your business. Seems to me the issue here is jealousy, not infidelity." Turning on his heel, he starts to walk away. Harvey doesn't bite, but follows him.

"So… you'll have no issue if I show Donna these family photos? He raises the envelope in the air. "They're nice shots of you and the wife, all time-stamped too. How many months along is she now? She looks great."

Harvey waits, lets his words sink in as he pulls out a photo of a child. "I have to say though, you've got your hands full with little Tommy here, especially if he grows up to be a charmer like his daddy."

Thomas stops in his tracks. Harvey is right behind him.

"I might even drive up to Connecticut myself, show Elizabeth dinner pictures with our _lovely_ _friend_. I'm sure she'll understand, she was once your mistress, wasn't she?"

He's spitting the words out now, "That dinner…the one where Donna wore that gown and you couldn't keep your hands to yourself?"

Thomas slowly turns. The men are a foot apart. Towering over Harvey, Thomas's blue eyes zero in.

"I care a lot about Donna. And I am _not_ playing her." His eyes shift left, then right, as he tries to justify. "My marriage has been over for a while and I was planning to leave. The baby is… unexpected. And this thing with Donna… it just happened. I know she wants _more. S_ o do I."

For a second, Harvey freezes. _More._ That God damn word. Without even realizing it, Thomas just dumped a bucket of salt into the one wound he and Donna have never been able to heal.

Harvey is seething.

"I don't give a _shit_ how you feel! You're married with a kid and another one on the way!" He wants to pummel the guy, his own issues with infidelity breaking through. "You don't do that to your family, and I sure as hell won't let you do that to Donna!"

Thomas looks around, shifting from one foot to the other, as if he's weighing his options. "What do you want, Harvey?"

Harvey's tone is threatening. "Stay away from her... Do you hear me? Cancel the trip. If I find out you so much as sent her a text, I'll tell Elizabeth everything about the asshole she's married to."

Then he leans in further. "You think you're unhappy now? Wait until you face a child custody battle. And don't think I won't take you there…"

"I can't just drop off the face of the earth without saying something," He fights back. "I've got important business in Paris and she's expecting me."

"You can and you will. You're a good liar, Thomas, you figure it out," Harvey pauses, shooting him a final burning stare. "And while you're at it, find yourself new representation. You're done at the firm."

With that, Harvey steps away. His head is pounding. He's built a career out of strong-arming guys like Thomas, but this took a piece of him.

Further down the block, after slowing his breath, he pulls out his cellphone. Not that he expected it, but Donna has not returned his calls. He hits #4 on his speed dial.

"Gretchen, it's Harvey. I need you to book me on the first flight to Paris tomorrow morning, and I need you to keep it to yourself. "

xxx

Day two and Donna is exhausted. She's certain she's walked to the moon and back since arriving, and she's loved every second of it. Paris is simply magic. Her afternoon of boutique shopping has been more fun than she could have ever imagined, and she swears she saw Jean Paul Gaultier walking down the street!

Sinking back onto the antique king-size bed, Donna decides she'll relax before Thomas arrives at seven. She hasn't heard from him since yesterday, but he mentioned he'd be busy at his Connecticut office, getting things together for Paris. Thomas is bringing his furniture design company to the European market next year, and she knows how important these upcoming meetings are.

Maybe the romance of this city is casting its spell, but Donna is _really_ looking forward to seeing her handsome man. He will likely be tired, so she'll suggest a quiet evening. They can eat dinner in the gorgeous courtyard restaurant downstairs, and enjoy a romantic bath to celebrate their first night together in Paris.

 _Maybe this "moving forward" thing might not be so difficult after all._


	4. Chapter 4

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 4**

Just before six in the evening, Harvey arrives at the Ritz Paris. Gretchen managed to book the last available room as all the hotels are full for the late spring tourist season. He had hoped to find space at Donna's hotel, but maybe this is for the best. If it all goes up in flames, at least he'll have somewhere to retreat.

Tired and emotionally spent, Harvey drops his luggage, throws the key on the bed and heads straight for the shower. He needs to wash the last 24 hours off and calm his nerves.

After toweling off, he shaves and takes a look around. For a last-minute find, the room is comfortable.

 _Gretchen did good_.

He selects a pair of dark jeans and a fitted black shirt. It's one of Donna's favourite looks and, tonight, he needs all the help he can get.

Donna's hotel is a 15-minute walk so Harvey decides to go on foot, hoping it might help release the anxiousness he's feeling. It's his first time in the City of Lights, but he is too distracted to notice anything. As he steps out onto the sidewalk, he takes a nervous breath and runs his fingers through his hair.

How can he manage this mess without losing her in the process?

 _This is going to hurt._

Harvey has to hand it to Thomas, Le Bristol Paris is a gorgeous hotel – polished marble floors, a dramatic, sweeping staircase, paintings and tapestries throughout, and flower boxes on every window. The furnishings, reproductions from Louis XV's collection, add an old-world elegance to the space. This is definitely Donna's kind of place.

As he makes his way to the elevators, Harvey catches sight of a large enclosed courtyard brimming with greenery. A bubbling stone fountain and twinkling patio lights create a romantic atmosphere as guests sample the wines and cheeses of the region. Harvey imagines that, if were not for him, Donna and Thomas would probably be doing the very same thing right now.

Feeling unsettled, he steps on the elevator and makes his way up to the fifth floor.

xxx

Donna is putting the finishing touches on her makeup when she hears a knock on the door. For a split second, it sounds like a "Harvey" knock, and she scolds herself in the mirror for even thinking such a thing.

"One second!" she hollers, curious as to why Thomas doesn't use his key.

Throwing caution to the wind, Donna is wearing the very black, very lacy, very sexy cocktail dress she had just purchased from a boutique around the corner. The halter front is open down to her navel. Scalloped lace and silk lightly cover her breasts, revealing the trickle of golden freckles in between. The back is completely exposed, except for a delicate piece of lace teasing her panty line.

This outfit is definitely more risqué than what she's used to wearing. It feels more like lingerie than something she would take out in public. But this is Paris, and the boutique owner assured her that if she wanted to make a statement, this dress was it.

With her red locks bouncing to the door, she turns the knob. "Did you miss me Mr. Kessler? Because I've missed…"

Donna's face suddenly drops, and with a shaky hand, she squeezes the doorknob tightly in an effort to steady herself. For a second, her vision goes blurry, as if her eyes are trying to protect her from what lies before her. She blinks, and Harvey has never seen such a look of panic on her face.

"Harvey?" she asks, as if she's still not convinced it's actually him.

"What are you doing here?"

"Did something happen?"

"Who died?"

"Is it my father?"

"Where's Thomas?"

She's firing off questions like bullets and Harvey thinks he's going to be sick.

"Donna." Harvey's heart is beating so fast it's pounding in his ears. He doesn't dare pass the threshold.

"Everyone is ok, but I need to talk to you." His voice cracks even though he's trying his best to appear calm.

Realizing what she is wearing, Donna steps back and crosses her arms. Her eyes are as wide as saucers and she can barely breathe.

 _What the hell is happening right now?_

Harvey's eyes are sad, but it doesn't stop them from tracing the outline of her dress. She looks stunning.

Donna feels the heat of his gaze. She takes another step back, protectively adjusting her arms to tightens the grip around her chest. She doesn't want to look at him, so for a second, she closes her eyes and looks away.

"Thomas will be here any min…" her voice resolute.

Harvey cuts her off. "He's not coming."

She shakes her head, and lets out a frustrated laugh. "You might find this hard to believe, Harvey, but he invited me." She can feel the bile rising to her throat. "I don't know what you think you're doing here, but it's not going to work."

Harvey takes a deep breath, steps inside, and gently pushes the door closed behind him. Donna is so taken aback with what is happening that she doesn't even notice. They've had their fair share of fights in public places, and Harvey doesn't want to make a scene here. He expects this is going to be a bad one.

"He's married."

"Jesus Christ, Harvey! You came all the way here to tell me that?" she snaps. "He's _divorced_ , actually! The firm represented him in the settlement. He told me everything. What the hell is wrong with you?!"

She doesn't know where to begin with him. "You just can't help yourself can you? You say you're happy for me, but you're not, are you?! I'm so fucking done with this!"

Her anger is raining down hard on him now and it makes his skin itch. But this is what they do. When one of them is weak, the other holds strong.

"That was his first wife," he states calmly determined to ignore her venom and give her time to process what he is saying. "He's not who he says he is, Donna. He has a wife and son in Connecticut."

Harvey decides to spare her all the details of Thomas's sordid life. She's hurt enough.

Donna shakes her head in disbelief, her mind trying to keep up with what is happening.

"Connecticut? How did you… Vanessa?"

He offers a weak nod. He feels ashamed, but after the Stephen incident, he couldn't help himself. Even if Donna doesn't want him, Harvey needed to make sure that whoever that lucky guy is, that he deserves her.

Her tears begin to fall and a wave of nausea hits her like a punch to the gut.

"So what? You think it's ok to just hire a private investigator every time I get asked out on a date?!" Her voice is shaky. Her arms are flailing now. She's coming undone. "Do you know how _shitty_ that makes me feel?!"

"Let me explain…" he offers, an arm reaching for her.

"Forget it, Harvey! You just couldn't let me be happy for one God damn weekend, could you?!" She waves him away. "Go to hell!"

"Donna…"

Her hand is on her mouth, ready to contain the sob that's coming. Donna gives him one final hurt-filled look before turning way. She storms into the bathroom, slams the door and collapses to the floor.

Harvey slowly walks over to the bed. He sits on the edge, elbows on his knees, his head in his hands. Hot tears hit the floor between his feet, so he squeezes his eyes tight to control the flow. Listening to Donna's muffled sobs through the door, Harvey feels like complete shit. He's desperate to force the door open and hold her until she stops. He wants to tell her that she deserves better and more and everything.

But he knows she won't have it. Not from him. Not after this.

She might very well hate him, but Harvey isn't leaving.


	5. Chapter 5

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 5**

 **Rumour has it my last chapter was too short! I had this ready so I've posted. I'll try and make the next ones longer. Happy reading! :)**

Harvey is still at the edge of the bed when the bathroom door eventually opens. He looks up to find Donna wrapped in a plush white hotel robe, black dress in hand, her eyes swollen from crying.

She'd been in there for a good half-hour and certainly didn't expect to see him when she came out. "This is usually around the time when you bail. I'm surprised you're still here."

He quickly sits up. That hurt, but he'll ignore it. His face is filled with worry.

"I am."

"Well, I'm still mad at you, Harvey." The anguish on her face is almost too much for him to bear.

His eyes follow her as she pads around the room, collecting her things and tossing them into her suitcase.

"What are you doing?" he asks.

"I'm going home."

He stands up. "Donna, please don't do this."

"Don't do what, Harvey? Her voice trembling. "I'm sorry if I don't feel up to visiting museums right now."

He takes a step towards her, desperately wanting to touch her. "He's an asshole, Donna. New York is full of guys like him. It's not your fault."

"Do you understand how stupid I feel right now? Here I thought…" She steps back, covering her mouth as she turns from him. "They never work out. Did you notice, these relationships? They never work out, do they?"

Harvey furrows his brow. He understands this pain. With a gentleness, he replies, "Until you're with the person you're supposed to be with, then yes… I guess they don't work out."

Feeling deflated, Donna drops into the chair across from the bed. She turns away, lost in thought, and then turns back to look him over.

"Why did you come?"

"Well, I tried to call you."

"You could have sent me a text, " she challenges.

"I didn't want you to be alone when you found out."

"So you flew to Paris?"

"Apparently I did. I hear it's nice at this time of year," he says dryly, trying, unsuccessfully, to cut the tension.

"Well now I know. You've done your duty." There's a false confidence in her voice, but her angry eyes tell him something else. "God knows I've had my share of disappointing men, I'll survive this one too."

Harvey sits back down on the bed. He might deserve that. But she's not going to push him away, not this time.

"You can hate me all you want, Donna," he says, feeling defensive. "Would you have preferred that I kept my mouth shut and let you think he was a good guy? Either way you'd end up hating me. Now you won't waste any more time and I won't lose any more sleep!"

Donna takes in his words. She sits silently for a while, dabbing away with a tissue, the mascara stains around her eyes.

"I didn't say I _hated_ you, Harvey," she clarifies. "I said I'm _mad_ at you."

"To me it feels like the same thing," he says. His tone giving away his upset. "And for the record, I didn't betray you. I'm trying to protect you."

"I honestly don't understand you." She gets up from the chair and using it as a barrier, stands behind it. "One day you act like you don't give a shit about me, and the next day you're flying half-way around the world because I need _protection_?!"

Harvey tenses his jaw. He wasn't ready for an interrogation.

"What did you just say to me? You think I don't care about you?!" His emotions are taking control now and he doesn't know how to bring himself back. "I just spent seven hours on a plane because I didn't want to see you hurt!"

"And why does it matter to you if I'm hurt?" With nothing to lose, she's pushing him hard now. "It didn't matter before, why would it matter now!"

Harvey runs his fingers through his hair and takes an exasperated breath.

"Do you think…? Do we have to do this, Donna?" He's getting tired now, his palms open towards her. "I thought I was doing the right thing. I'm sorry if I screwed this up."

Angry, defensive and emotionally drained, they both know they are treading very closely to that line where the hurtful things said cannot be taken back. So they stop arguing and retreat to their corners - Harvey on the bed and Donna back in the chair. He keeps glancing her way, but she won't look at him.

"Why don't you just go," she whispers, not giving him eye contact, but giving him an out.

"I'm not leaving," His tone is certain. "So don't ask me to."

They continue to sit in silence and neither moves.

Donna rubs her entire face with her hands, massaging her eyes and temples in the hopes that some logical explanation for this disaster will show itself. This holiday, this promising dream that she has been so looking forward to has become a nightmare. There will be no future with Thomas, no new beginnings, no moving on. Four thousand miles from home and she's right back where she started.

"I just feel really…stupid… and sad," Donna admits with an exhausted sigh.

"I know." His eyes are also stinging. "But you're gonna be ok."

Harvey would cross the room and wrap his arms around her, but he's frozen. Doing that would mean breaking their well-established pattern of keeping their distance, and he's not sure either of them could handle that now anyway.

So he tries something else. He goes for levity. When things go to shit, they've always been able to find some dark humour in their misery.

"You know, it's not all bad… " he starts, glancing at her cautiously. "At least he's not a murderer."

Donna remains silent and expressionless. She's huffing as her swollen eyes search out the ceiling and then travel across the room. They eventually land on Harvey. He holds her gaze, his eyes telling her he's got her and that he's not going anywhere. Her features soften a little in response.

"Murderer…well he certainly killed the mood tonight..." she says without smiling. But it's something.

Harvey softly chuckles. The Donna he knows could always make light of a bad situation. He's relieved that she's still in there… somewhere.

Clearing his throat, he moves to change the subject. "Have you eaten?"

"I'm not hungry," she responds.

"I can order something, or we can sit at one of those little cafés down the street." He's hopeful he can talk her into staying. "We can even do that thing where I point someone out and you make up a story about them."

"You hate that game," she says flatly.

"I do," he admits, his lips giving way to a slight smile. "But this is the people-watching capital of the world. Maybe we can salvage something good from tonight."

Donna offers a small nod, but nothing more. She collects her clothes and heads to the bathroom to change.

Harvey, meanwhile, texts Louis to check on things at the firm. In exchange for Louis taking his meetings without question, Harvey promised to go mudding with him. He's already dreading it, but desperate times require desperate measures.

A few minutes later, Donna appears. She's wearing slim white jeans, a navy blue silk top, and silver mule sandals.

"Ready to go?" She looks to Harvey and his pupils grow large.

"What?" she asks, feeling a little self conscious.

"It's just… it's been a while since I've seen you looking so casual," he says as he looks her over. "I like it."

Donna points to her face, "Except for my puffy eyes."

"Nothing a couple of glasses of wine can't cure," he assures her.

xxx

After a short walk, Donna and Harvey settle on a charming side-street café. With a gentle hand to her back, he guides her to a quiet corner table so they can talk.

Twirling his wine glass with his fingers, he begins. "Donna…I'm really sorry.. about all of this. I know you're hurt and mad at me. After Stephen… I guess I was feeling protective."

Donna bites down on her bottom lip and nods. "You should have come to me. You could have said something."

"I didn't think I had a right to say anything. Would you have believed me if I did? We don't talk like we used to..." His voice trailing off. Donna knows he's right, and she can hear the hurt in his voice.

It's moments like this that have made it so difficult for Donna to move on. Harvey has this honourable, vulnerable and deeply caring side that few people see. She knows he would never do her wrong, even if he can't give her what she needs. And no matter what, she would still take a bullet for him.

"I won't lie to you, Harvey," her eyes welling with tears. "You totally blindsided me. I thought it might go somewhere with him."

Shaking her head, she continues, "I actually thought he cared about me. I didn't see it coming. Stephen and now him, I can't even trust my own judgement."

Harvey could feel his heart sinking. A pang of jealousy mixed in with the memory of being blindsided himself - with that kiss – only for Donna to tell him it meant nothing. That stung. It still does.

"Well you can trust mine," he assures her. Swallowing hard, he adds, "The right man is going to find you, Donna."

Just then, the waiter arrives with their plates and a refill of their wine glasses.

Harvey tries to steer the conversation to a happier place. "So what have you been doing since you've arrived?"

"Visiting boutiques mostly… as I thought I'd do the touristy stuff on the weekend." She won't say his name.

"I noticed Hermès on the way to my hotel. It's big. Did you go?"

"I did, but when I got there…" Donna explains. "I guess sometimes I miss those days when I worked for you. Hermès was something we did together. It didn't feel right to go in there."

Harvey presses his lips together. He feels his eyes misting, and in that voice he only uses with her, he says, "I miss those days, too."

Hoping to entice her to stay, he takes a chance. "Let's go tomorrow and I'll buy you a handbag, just like old times."

"Harvey, that's thoughtful. You don't have to do that, but thank you." She's trying her best to not get pulled back in.

Harvey furrows his brow, "Donna, Just stay. It's only a couple of days. Don't let that jerk ruin this for you," he says, his eyes pleading. "And it would be nice to…to spend time together."

Donna thinks for a minute. The thought of going home right now is pretty depressing and spending time with Harvey is tugging at her heartstrings, so she nods. "Ok, but I'm feeling a little fragile, I might not be the best company."

A look of relief and then a tiny smile washes over Harvey's face. He suddenly feels lighter. "So… we have a date… with Hermès tomorrow?

"We do," she says, returning his smile while tucking a red strand behind her ear.

After dinner and another glass of wine, Harvey walks Donna back to her hotel room. Before entering, she turns to him.

"It was nice to get out tonight."

Harvey nods. His throat is dry. What he wouldn't give to embrace her, run his hands across her back and touch his cheek to hers. He feels responsible for her pain. Not because of what he revealed about Thomas, but because he's to blame for why she was dating Thomas in the first place. If he had been honest with her all those years ago, there would never have been a Mark or a Mitchell or a Stephen _or_ a Thomas. Instead, he's become just one more in a long line of disappointing men in Donna's life.

"Are you going to be ok tonight?" he asks. "I'm just a phone call away if you need."

"I'll be ok."

"Then I'll see you bright and early for breakfast?" It sounds like a question but he isn't asking.

She nods. "Goodnight, Harvey."

"Goodnight, Donna."

Before leaving her hotel, Harvey heads to the check-in desk to take over payment of Donna's hotel room. Thomas has done a number on her, and Harvey is determined to remove any trace of that jerk that he can.

On his way back to the Ritz, he takes a deep inhale of the fresh evening air.

Today was tough, but for the first time in months, Harvey feels hopeful.

 _I'm ready._


	6. Chapter 6

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 6**

Donna is sitting in bed scrolling through her work emails, when she hears the knock.

It's early but she knows it's Harvey. The familiar way his hand hits the door always causes her heart to beat a little faster.

 _Calm down, Donna, or you're going back to square one_.

Wrapping herself in her hotel robe, and putting on a brave face, she lets him in.

"Wow, I'm impressed. It's 8 o'clock and you're already here."

This was the second time in less than 24 hours that Harvey has seen Donna without her office armour. Fresh-faced without makeup, her hair is tied in a loose ponytail and she's barefoot. Harvey, trying not to look obvious, gives her a quick glance.

 _Beautiful? Cute? Pretty?_ _All of the above_.

Harvey is desperately trying to play it cool, but ever since Donna agreed to stay the weekend, he's felt both excited and nervous. In fact, he hardly slept last night, waiting for the sun to rise so he could see her again.

"It feels more like two in the morning in my head, but we have a lot to do today," he says, handing her a take-out coffee and a box of fresh pastries. "This will get you started until we can stop for something more."

For operating on little sleep, Harvey looks good. Dressed in tan pants, a white shirt and navy sweater, he appears younger in his casual clothes.

Donna has always found Harvey's boyishness incredibly sexy. The way he tilts his head when he asks a question he already knows the answer to, or how he dramatically rolls his eyes when she teases him. Then there's that Cheshire cat grin - a reminder that inside the trappings of his power suit is a mischievous 12-year-old boy ready to escape.

"That's disappointing," she kids. "I thought we were going to shop for handbags _all_ day."

Harvey smiles inwardly. He senses Donna is in a better frame of mind this morning, so he follows her lead.

"Well, get a move on. The bags aren't going to buy themselves!" He's missed this. Their back and forth, their playfulness. He could talk with her all day.

Donna sips her coffee and cradles a warm almond croissant in her hand. From the closet, she selects a white cotton cardigan and blush-colored sundress, and heads for the bathroom.

Taking a bite of his fresh chocolate croissant, Harvey walks to the window and opens the curtains. A perfect view of the Eiffel Tower.

Looking out, he thinks about the millions of first dates, first kisses and marriage proposals witnessed by that majestic landmark. Year after year, visitors from across the globe make their pilgrimage to Paris in celebration of love.

Then, Harvey's thoughts turn to Donna. For years, he's taken her love for granted. Sure, it was her job to assist, but not to care for him like she has. Time after time, she's put him first, even when it left her at risk. She's always been there for a late-night call or to save him from himself. Everyone knows how fortunate he's been– Jessica, Louis, Mike – even Stu Buzzini once called him a lucky bastard and tried to steal her away.

For years, Harvey has had in front of him what most people spend their lives searching for. But his insecurities have always gotten the upper hand, reminding him that he doesn't deserve her, and that it would only be a matter of time before she'd know it too.

Last night, after Donna agreed to stay, Harvey felt hopeful, but his insecurities are, once again, flaring. He can feel it burning his insides and rising to his throat. Who is he kidding? His luck ran out with her when he made her promise to never kiss him again, when he screamed that he didn't want her.

 _It wasn't true, not one God damn word of it!_

Then he thinks back to the time when Donna did want him. She admitted as much the night they feasted on strawberries and whipped cream and lust. He took that for granted too.

That was also the first time she blindsided him. Harvey went to her all cocky. A hotshot lawyer wanting a little fun. But after that night, the tables turned. He didn't expect she would reel him in. He didn't know what to do with what she was doing to him. So he hired her, kept her close, and also at arm's length.

It was the perfect solution, except it backfired. Soon, Harvey missed her when she wasn't near, got his hopes up whenever she teased, and felt jealous after hearing her Monday morning confessions.

He can't say she didn't warn him though. She told him outright that if he were ever lucky enough to have her, there'd be no going back. He's paid that price ever since.

"Sorry I took so long," she apologizes. Donna is a vision in pink and white. "I'm a little off my game today, but we can go."

Motionless at the window, Harvey doesn't respond. "Are you ok?" she asks.

"Yeah," he offers a half-smile. "Just a little jet-lagged I think. "

xxx

The visit to Hermès isn't about shopping so much as it is about getting back what has been lost between them. For two hours, Harvey patiently follows Donna through every section of the enormous store -, jewelry, housewares, clothing, perfumes. She's a kid in a candy shop, and now he truly understands what it means when they call a man "whipped".

If Mike could see him now, following Donna around like a puppy like this, he'd never hear the end of it.

Harvey doesn't care though, treasuring every uninterrupted moment with Donna. He grins whenever she sees something that is "to die for, Harvey". He shakes his head as he listens to her talk herself in and out of buying everything in sight, and he can't take his eyes off those swaying hips as she weaves her way through the store like she owns the place.

When Donna catches Harvey scrolling on his phone, she take him by the arm and leads him straight to the men's section, insisting he buy some new ties. He has plenty, he tells her, but she doesn't care.

"You need something special to remember this trip by," she asserts, lifting tie after tie next to his chest to see how they look.

Harvey smiles to himself. He's barely been in Paris for a day and it's already more special than Donna could ever know.

Next on the list is a thank-you gift for Gretchen. Harvey follows Donna's lead so _she_ can pick out something special.

"Secretaries don't let other secretaries receive terrible gifts," she informs. "Page 32 of 'The Donna Paulsen Secretaries' Handbook.'"

"Except, you're not a secretary anymore, Donna." He's rolling his eyes at her.

"I know, but the handbook is a classic, it stands the test of time… and very well-written if I do say so myself," she quips.

"That's funny, because I'm currently reading another one of your best sellers, 'How to become Managing Partner When No One is Looking,'" he volleys back, his Cheshire cat grin in full view.

There they are, standing in the middle of this luxurious Parisian boutique, giggling like teenagers, relishing in the ridiculousness of their conversation and the healing it brings.

When they finally stop, Harvey can't help but look at her – really look at her. First, he focuses on those thick eyelashes, then on her cute nose and finally those glossy lips, that he swears to God he's going to kiss before the weekend is over.

 _Donna, I've missed you so much._

Laughing with Harvey has been the best medicine. It's then that Donna realizes she hasn't laughed like that in a long time, with anyone. This morning has really scrambled things in her brain though. One moment she feels light and optimistic and then a heaviness suddenly hits her. How could she be so stupid about Thomas? And then Harvey… it's been wonderful to reconnect, but if history offers any indication, they're well on their way to creating yet another "new normal" as friends.

Realizing Harvey is looking at her, Donna doesn't look away, but offers a thoughtful smile in return.

Last night she was so angry with him, she came very close to putting an end to the 13 years of "whatever they are". This was definitely a low point because it's not something she would have ever considered before. The truth is, she still can't believe he actually came to Paris, just like she was stunned when he ripped up her resignation letter that night he showed up at her door. Harvey is king of the grand gestures and he's as complicated as hell, but she can't accuse him of not caring.

The pair finish with a visit to the handbag section. Donna can't decide on what she wants, so Harvey insists on two – a large fuchsia tote and a black evening clutch emblazoned with a rose gold "H" on the front.

"Nice to see you got something with my initial on it." He smiles as they leave, clearly pleased with himself for his wittiness.

"Well you're free to borrow it for your next event, it would pair well with your tux," she teases back, the twinkle returning to her eye.

As they start along the sidewalk, Donna suddenly stops. Her red hair blowing in the breeze, and a shy smile on her face, "Thank you, Harvey. This meant a lot to me."

With a shopping bag in each hand, Harvey stops, his heart losing the battle to play it cool.

"It meant a lot to me too, Donna, I am glad we did it." His eyes warm to hers. "Besides, we're going to need that big pink bag for all the wine we're going to bring back."

" _We"_

It's not lost on Harvey that when he said it, his heart skipped yet another beat.

The pair walk back to Donna's hotel to drop off their purchases, and then spend the better part of an hour casually wandering the streets. Harvey thought it would take them a lot longer to get back to where they once were, but it hasn't. She asks about his brother, Marcus, and he wants to know about her upcoming play. She tells him about her apartment renovations and he recounts a funny conversation with Mike. They're floating across Paris in their own bubble, completely oblivious to the city around them.

The further they walk, the more Harvey realizes there is definitely no going back. In fact, he dreads "back to normal". Those repressed feelings he's been so good at keeping in check are forcing their way out, stirring his stomach and taking over his frontal lobe. But whenever he allows himself to imagine the possibility, fear douses the fire inside him. He's knows he's had so many chances with her and he's blown every one of them.

Donna, meanwhile, is also having trouble keeping her feelings in check. Mostly because she doesn't trust them. With everything that has happened with Thomas, she already feels insecure, and spending time with Harvey is stirring up a hornet's nest of emotions she's not ready to deal with. It scares her that falling back into her habits with Harvey has come as naturally as breathing. Donna doesn't want to go back, not like they were. These last few months have been rough, and she's not sure she can survive another blow.

 _You're just going to have to figure out a way to live with what you are to each other, and what you aren't._

"Let's get some lunch," Harvey suggests as they find themselves beside a street market. With a fresh baguette, a variety of cheeses, a bottle of wine and two plastic cups in tow, they make their way to Parc Champs de Mars, a gorgeous greenspace in the shadow of the Eiffel Tower.

Harvey offers his sweater so Donna can sit. She kicks off her sandals, the grass tickling her perfectly manicured toes. It's a sunny Saturday and the park is busy. Families sit together on blankets, children play in the nearby fountains and couples stroll hand-in-hand.

Harvey watches Donna as her eyes settle on a young couple canoodling on a park bench. They are clearly in love.

"Do you remember your first kiss?" he asks.

"My real first kiss?" She is taken aback by the question. "Damien Read. I was 15, he was 16, and he asked me to the school dance."

"An older man… must have been a good kisser if you still remember his name," Harvey ribs. He can't believe he actually feels a twinge of jealousy over a teenage boy.

"He was pretty sweet," she recalls. "He had this wavy brown hair and round glasses, and a cute British accent, which I thought was a big deal."

"So why did you break up?:" Harvey asks. "Did he leave to go to Wizard School?

Donna bursts out laughing and slaps his arm.

Then with a sly smile, she catches him off guard. "To be honest, I never did see his _wand_ … so I can't be sure."

Harvey's eyes go wide, the corners of his mouth form a smile, and then he's laughing again. He's relieved to see that, bit by bit, the Donna he knows, _his Donna_ , is coming back.

She's also going to be the death of him. No matter what he throws out, Donna matches him. No other person on the planet can do that to him the way she does.

"Ok, what about you?" Donna asks, redirecting the conversation. "I bet you were a ladies' man long before you were old enough to date the ladies."

"Actually, no," he admits. "I was more interested in baseball than girls, at least in junior high."

"Seriously? So who was the lucky young lady who made it to first base with you?" she asks playfully, raising a quick eyebrow.

"Emily Greene. I was standing by my locker after practice. She came over, kissed me right on the lips and then ran away. Maybe it was a dare, I don't know."

"Wow, pretty brave…" she says, knowing full well how her comment would play out. Donna's been guilty of the "kiss and run" herself. She thinks to make light of it but stops herself, the memory of the aftermath of her kiss cutting too close to the bone.

"She never talked to me after that, just avoided me the rest of the school year," Harvey also knew they were no longer talking about their teenage years.

He looks Donna straight in the eyes, his voice soft. "You know, if she had just given me another chance, I would have _really_ kissed her back. I was so caught off guard, I didn't know what to do after that… then it was too late."

Harvey's words go straight to her abdomen. He looks for a reaction, but she gives him nothing. Donna's insides, however are spinning. She still feels guilt over that kiss, what it did to them and to his relationship. They'd also said a lot of painful things to each other afterwards, some of which Donna still hasn't recovered from. Things she'd sooner forget than ever bring up.

Sensing the energy between them has changed, Donna and Harvey sit quietly for a while, each lost in their own thoughts as they scan the park and finish the last of their picnic.

Harvey finally turns to her, his lips pressed tight before speaking. "What's going on in that brain of yours?"

"Just thinking about everything that's happened," she says, a heaviness in her words, her mood now sombre.

Donna has never doubted her decisions before, but the failure of one relationship after another has her questioning her ability to find love, and to be loved.

"Maybe I'm one of those people who is just not meant to have a forever relationship, not everyone does," she contemplates. "Maybe I'm meant to have a fabulous career, travel the world and meet interesting people."

Harvey raises his eyebrows in surprise. He pauses, then asks, "You could if you wanted. But is that what you want?"

"I'm not a teenager, Harvey, I don't have my entire life ahead of me," she reasons, her tone suggesting her words taste like medicine. "At some point, things just are what they are, and I need to make the best of it."

Harvey pauses again, trying to avoid any landmines that might send their conversation in another direction. He needs to ask again and he isn't sure if he's more afraid of the question or of the answer.

"What _more_ do you want, Donna?" They both know what he means.

"The truth?" She's certain this time. If it's not going to be with Harvey anyway, what does it matter what he knows.

Harvey gives a small, anxious nod.

"I want to be someone's first choice." Donna has never been so honest with him about this, but she still can't completely put it out there. It's the one card she'll always hold close to her chest.

"After Mike and Rachel's wedding… I want what they have. Someone to love me, to wake up with and to kiss goodnight. I want Christmases together, and Thanksgivings and birthdays and vacations. I want little feet running around my house and colorful artwork on my fridge."

Donna turns to look at Harvey, her thick eyelashes wet as they try to hold back all her wants.

Harvey's eyes go wide. He hasn't taken a breath since she started speaking.

Donna can only manage a wistful smile.

"So... there you have it," she says.


	7. Chapter 7

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 7**

Harvey is speechless. Even worse, he literally tries to say something but the words won't come.

Just like that, in a matter of seconds, Donna has laid it all bare, shining a great big spotlight on a very secret place in her heart. How could he have not known this about her? Thirteen years… how did he not see this?

He's been feeling that a lot lately. That he doesn't know her as well as he thinks, and Paris has been a real eye-opener.

Yes, Harvey straight-up asked her what she wants, but he never expected the unfettered truth. That's not what they do. When it comes to these fragile matters, they skirt, imply, or suggest, always giving the other enough wiggle room to keep their friendship intact. They don't just come right out and say it, which is exactly why he's confused… and worried. Something's changed and once again, he feels blindsided.

Then it hits him. Donna is not talking about a future with him. In fact, her wants have nothing to do with him. Sure they've reconnected, flirted even, as friends, and that's why she's being so open. There's nothing that Harvey has to wiggle out of now, so, she just put it out there.

What did he expect, really? Every chance he's been given, he's pushed her away. The last time he insisted he didn't want more, she agreed. And before he came set to rescue her in Paris, like some knight in shining armour, she was well on her way to building a future with someone else.

" _I didn't feel anything when I kissed you, Harvey"_

" _I thought it might go somewhere with him."_

" _I want someone to love me…"_

Harvey asked for honesty and she gave it to him, right down to the babies that she wants. But her words never once suggested he would be part of that plan. And if he knows Donna, it's only a matter of time before she picks herself up, dusts herself off, and finds a way to get the life that she wants.

What can he say to that?

Nothing.

The sinking sensation in Harvey's stomach tells him that his time is running out, if it hasn't already. He needs to get his shit together or she really will be gone.

Once again, the tables have turned. For years, Harvey was afraid she would demand these things of him, and now he feels sick that she hasn't.

After the way he's treated her though, it makes complete sense. It was arrogant of him to assume, that he could just fly in, tell her what he wants, and that she'd agree.

So when Harvey opens his mouth to speak, the words are lodged in his throat and burning his esophagus.

 _I love you._

 _We belong together._

 _Give me another chance._

Why would she even believe him at this point?

Harvey turns to Donna, his concerned eyes tracing her features. She's put on a brave face, but her weak smile isn't convincing. The bomb about Thomas that went off is still coming down on her, and she's shaken.

"Maybe I'm just not meant to have a forever relationship…" she'd said. Those words warning like a siren in Harvey's ears. Her expectations of him may be long gone, but he's never, ever seen her so doubtful about herself. That leaves him shaken.

Whenever Harvey has found himself adrift, Donna has always been the one to toss him a life preserver, and to safely guide him home. In fact, she's been that beacon of light for everyone at the firm – Rachel, Mike, Louis, Katrina, even Robert. Always giving of herself, never expecting anything in return.

A few years back, just as Mike was set to go to trial, Harvey was at his lowest point. He had lost all faith, and late one night, came to her crying. Unwavering in her belief that he was worthy, Donna pulled him back from the edge. He can see her face now, confident and fearless with her words. That tenacious look in her eyes holding him and never allowing him to fall.

Now, this beautiful, caring woman has lost faith that she's deserving, that someone could ever really love her, and it's breaking his heart.

 _Did I do this to her? Pulling her close then pushing her away?_

They have one more day together in Paris and Harvey knows he's got to fix things. Donna's hurt and he's partly to blame. It's unfair of him to just drop a grenade of his wants into the mix. First, Harvey needs to clean up his mess. And if his words won't work now, he's just going to have to show her.

So, Harvey does something she would never in a million years expect.

Sitting next to Donna on the grass, Harvey shifts ever-so-slightly closer. Without a word, he gently wraps an arm around her, steadily drawing her in, until her mess of red hair is splayed across his shoulder. He's tense, at first, because this is uncharted territory for him. They've hugged before but only because she asked. This is different. This is Harvey reaching out, comforting her, putting her first.

He expects Donna might pull away, but she doesn't, so he rests his mouth on the top of her head. There are a dozen kisses waiting on the tip of his tongue, but he just won't allow himself to go that far. So to welcome this new intimacy, he tilts his head and breathing into her, closes his eyes.

With every breath, Donna sinks deeper into his hold, until Harvey feels brave enough to wrap both his arms around her slender frame. He feels the warmth of their bodies together, and he can smell a hint of her vanilla shampoo. Taking another chance, he slowly runs his fingers up and down the length of her arm, just enough to soothe them both.

Leaning into Harvey, Donna listens to the beat of his pulsing heart. The rhythm is strong and steady and comforting. Embracing its predictability, she also closes her eyes. Soon, they're breathing in time, and it calms her.

Harvey and Donna stay this way for what they both feel is too short a time. Then Harvey finally finds his voice.

"You know… they say the course of true love never did run smooth… It's going to be ok, Donna. Don't give up on what you really want because of what happened yesterday."

He can't see her face, but he knows she's smiling.

"Did you just recite Shakespeare to me?" Her head still resting, her voice resonating on his shoulder.

"Maybe... Except the last part. I had to google that."

Donna chuckles. Then she feels it. Shivers down her spine that lead straight to the butterflies in her abdomen. Harvey doesn't do comfort like this, but he's doing it now, and she doesn't want him to let go.

After allowing herself a few more breaths, Donna forces herself to take control of her senses. Then slowly pulling away, she busies herself by smoothing out the wrinkles on her skirt.

"Thank you, Harvey. I needed that," she says, her eyes too shy to look at him. "I'm not usually this emotional."

"I'm always going to be here for you, Donna."

Harvey's candor takes Donna by surprise. She blinks a few times, then catches his gaze. There's warmth and affection emanating from his eyes. If this weren't Harvey, she'd be thinking something completely different right now. But it is Harvey, so she pulls herself together.

"Ok, enough of feeling sad," Donna redirects. "You promised me a trip up that big metal thing over there."

"I did," he says, disappointed their moment has come to an end.

Harvey helps Donna to her feet. As they make their way towards the Eiffel Tower, he playfully asks, "Do you think they sell hot dogs at the top? Because in New York, we'd have hot dogs up there."

"I'm pretty sure you're going to be disappointed," she smirks, but not before appreciating his sweet attempt to make her smile.

xxx

The view from the Eiffel Tower is breathtaking. Under the sun, Paris is a shining sea of white stone buildings that fit together like perfect little puzzle pieces. The city's grand boulevards run as far as the eye can see, each of them leading to some magnificent moment in French history.

Donna and Harvey walk the perimeter of the Tower's second level, tracing the path of the Seine River and trying to identify the sites below – the famous bridges, the Louvre, Notre Dame. They take a few selfies and oblige when other tourists ask.

"You certainly get a sense of how big Paris is from up here," Harvey says as he leans on the railing.

"I really miss Rachel," Donna admits, completely out of the blue.

Harvey turns his face to her and raises his eyebrows in surprise. The direction of this conversation is not what he expects, but he adjusts.

"You've had a lot of changes, a lot to deal with," he empathizes. "A new job, Mike and Rachel leaving… this weekend."

"She's been my soft place to land, you know?" Donna confides, her red stands blowing in the breeze. "We text all the time and she's just a call away, but it's not the same. I miss having a good girlfriend at the office."

"I thought you were getting to know Samantha a little better?" He's curious.

"We've gone out for drinks," she says. "But it's not the same, and, to be honest, I'm not sure I completely trust her."

Harvey thinks back to the time when Jessica told him that he and Donna were as close as two people could be without being "that". It's true, they were certainly an unshakeable team. There was never a day or night that they didn't talk, she had a key to his place, and he trusted her with his life.

After Donna left to work for Louis, though, it's never been the same. She had every right to go, but Harvey has never really gotten over it. When she pushed to become COO, he begrudgingly gave it to her, and she felt his bitterness. So she turned to Rachel, Louis and Mike for friendship and for support in her new role.

"You're not alone, you know." He wants her to know she's been heard. "I'm not Rachel, but I'm here."

Donna looks at him, confused and curious about what he's telling her.

Then she presses her lips together for a small smile. "Are you sure you're up for what's required to be a good girlfriend?"

"Did I not just go handbag shopping with you?" he asks with a tilt of his head. "That should, at least, qualify."

"Yes you did, I'll give you that." She offers him nothing more and turns her attention to the view before her.

Harvey is also looking out. After taking a breath, he decides to open up.

"I really miss having Mike walk into my office every morning… even though he was a pain in the ass most of the time," he says, offering her misery a little company.

"Please. You're practically brothers. And what you did for him… I bet there isn't one lawyer on the eastern seaboard who would have done what you did," she replies, gently placing her hand on his forearm. "You gave him a good life. It's one of the things I love about you, Harvey. You always take care of the people around you."

Harvey feels a tug in his chest, his arm tingling at her touch.

 _Did she say love?_

"Well not everyone would agree…I've made a mess of things," he counters, referring to more than the just the fallout of hiring a fraud.

"We've all survived, Harvey," she assures him. "Louis is very happy, Jessica is doing great in Chicago, and Mike and Rachel… they would have never found each other if it weren't for you."

"What about you? Are you happy, Donna?" He really wants to know.

"I love my job. It's big, but I love it," she says, clearly avoiding the personal.

"You were meant to be COO, Donna, and… I owe you an apology." he admits, trying to right another wrong. "I should have promoted you sooner but I didn't because I liked having you all to myself. It was selfish of me and I shouldn't have held you back. I'm sorry."

Another surprise. Donna doesn't know what to say, so she keeps her eyes on the city below. Before responding, she turns to see that Harvey's face is full of remorse. Something is changing, but she's not sure what.

"Thank you for saying that Harvey. It means a lot. " Looking across at the city, Donna throws it back, "And you, Harvey… are you happy?"

"You know me, it's always complicated," he sighs. "But I'm happy hanging out with you right now."

He turns to look at her, his eyes sincere. "Seriously Donna, spending time like this... if I didn't tell you before, I'm really happy we did this."

"Me too, Harvey," she returns his smile.

They're both leaning on the rail now, quietly taking in the view. Her mind always busy, Donna brushes the hair from her face and turns to him once more. "If we just met each other today, do you think we'd be friends?"

"If I'd never met you before today, I don't know if I'd even be here," he chuckles. "You've saved my sorry ass so many times."

"Well if we're talking sorry asses, I think you've saved mine a few times, too," she says. "Maybe we would have just met in prison."

She's caught him off guard again, and Harvey laughs.

"They have co-ed prisons?" A wide grin reaches his eyes. Then with a quick raise of his eyebrows, he teases, "I would _totally_ be your friend in prison."

She rolls her eyes at his poor attempt to flirt, "You're an idiot."

"Seriously, Harvey," she prods. "If you just met me today, what would you think?"

"I'd think what I think every day," he says. "How was I so lucky to meet such an amazing, smart, beautiful woman who puts up with me..."

"You really think that?" she's doubting him, not sure if they're still flirting.

"Of course I do." Then tilting his head, a shy look on his face, he presses his lips together for a second, and asks. "What would you think of me?"

"The same as the first day I met you," she admits. "Smart, cocky, but kinda pretty." A sly smile forming.

Harvey shakes his head and chuckles. "Seriously, that's what you thought? Smart, ok. Cocky, ok, but just 'kinda pretty?'" He's still trying to bring her around.

"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?" She quips.

"Oh my God, are you reciting Shakespeare to me now?" he asks.

"Smart, cocky and kinda pretty? Yes, Harvey, that's definitely Shakespeare."

xxx

It's almost dark by the time Donna and Harvey return to her hotel. They have no formal plans for dinner, but consider finding a place along the river.

Harvey is on the bed, his back resting against the headboard, as he furiously types meeting instructions to Louis. With a new outfit in hand, Donna heads into the bathroom. She plans to use her Hermès clutch tonight, a gesture to show Harvey how much she appreciates the gift.

Twenty minutes later, gorgeous in a midnight blue slip dress, Donna is ready for a night on the town.

"Let's eat!" she says, running her fingers through her thick hair.

She turns to face Harvey, only to discover they are staying put. The jetlag has finally caught up with him and he's completely passed out on the bed. His face is relaxed, bringing out the boyishness in his features. Donna has only ever seen one picture of Harvey when he was young. She smiles to herself, remembering how cute he was as a child.

Then, she slowly takes the phone from his limp hand, turns it off and sets it on the nightstand. She carefully removes his shoes, then adjusts his pillow, places a blanket over him and gently tucks it in around his form.

Donna can't help but stare at his face. She lightly touches his hair, resisting the temptation to kiss his forehead, although that's all she can think about.

 _He actually flew to Paris._

Placing her clutch on the desk, Donna heads back to the bathroom to get ready for bed. After quietly changing into her nightgown, she slips into the opposite side of the giant bed. It's early, but she's also tired.

After turning off the lamp, Donna reflects on the day's events, grateful that Harvey talked her into staying. She's felt quite vulnerable, her emotions getting the best of her at times. But Harvey has made a real effort to show her how much he cares, and she's happy they've been able to recapture the friendship they've lost. With her back to him, Donna lets out a long exhale and slowly drifts off to sleep.

xxx

It's the middle of the night when Harvey opens his eyes. He's completely disoriented and then he feels a warmth across his body. Donna, wrapped in a duvet, is curled up next to him, her back pressed against his chest. Harvey's arm is resting across her waist. He can feel it rise and fall in time with her breathing.

At first, he thinks it's another of one of his "Donna" dreams, but then he feels the blanket around him… and notices he's not wearing shoes.

 _She took them off._

Harvey is surprised that such a kind and simple act could affect him so much. She's still taking care of him. This is a far cry from the dozens of times he's woken up alone on his couch, dishevelled and in his suit, with a half-finished glass of scotch on the coffee table.

 _This feels so much better._

For months, he's been tortured by his lies, regrets, and her angry words. He can't remember the last time he's had a decent night's sleep.

Lying in the darkness, Harvey embraces the warmth between them – he feels like he's finally home and able to put his suitcase down.

So he nestles his face deeper into her hair and delivers a quiet kiss to the back of her head.

Tonight he's going to imagine that she is his and he is hers.

Tonight he's going to rest.


	8. Chapter 8

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 8 - FYI - a couple of sentences here are a little more graphic than my last.**

Harvey has been awake for a while, but he won't dare move a muscle. He knows it's going to be awkward when Donna eventually opens her eyes. But right now, he's doesn't care. He's busy.

Since the early hours, it's been playing on repeat in his head. First, they are lying just as they are, and then she slowly turns to him. He can see it on her face as he loses himself in those beautiful hazel eyes. She loves him.

Next, he envelops her in his arms. His bare chest pressed against the pink flesh of her nipples. His palms are on her back, holding her to him. She's so close he can feel her warm breath on his neck.

And then… then she smiles. Glossy lips opening to deliver a deep, slow kiss to his mouth, a taste that tingles all the way to his groin.

Finally, when he pulls back, he can tell that she already knows what he's about to say. But he wants to tell her himself. And when he does, his words just flow, like poetry.

Christmases, he says. Thanksgivings and birthdays and vacations. He wants little league and ballet recitals, too. All of it… with her. Everything… with her.

His head heavy on the pillow, Harvey knows he could just wake her and confess his secrets. Donna has accused him of running from his feelings, so he's been trying to match her vulnerability, and he wonders if she feels it.

But to tell her right now? He won't, he can't. Not here. His lawyering instincts tell him he needs neutral ground, and the bed that's holding her and all his fantasies is certainly not that.

As Donna begins to stir, Harvey tries to slow his heart before it sinks.

Time's up, so he feigns surprise.

"I'm so sorry about this, Donna." These are the only words Harvey can muster as he quickly rolls away from her. Clothes wrinkled and hair disheveled, he busies himself by collecting his shoes as he tries to act the part.

"I guess it all caught up with me… and we missed dinner."

Donna slowly sits up in bed, her sleepy eyes adjusting to the morning light streaming through the window. Waves of red hair blaze across her white shoulders.

Disappointed, but not surprised that Harvey practically flew out of the bed, Donna takes this as one more sign to avoid the rabbit hole she's been circling. Wrapping the comforter snuggly, protectively, under her arms, she adjusts the thin strap of her champagne-colored nightgown.

"You were exhausted and I didn't want to wake you, so I covered you up."

Seeing him uncomfortable, she's almost apologetic with her explanation, and that leaves her unsettled.

 _I'm a grown-ass woman. Why the hell do I feel like I just woke up in an ex-boyfriend's dorm room?_

"I noticed," he says. He's looking everywhere but at the bed. "To tell you the truth, I haven't slept this well in a while, so thank you."

With feelings of rejection swelling, Donna lets out a sarcastic chuckle.

"Just what every girl wants to hear when she wakes up to a man in her bed."

She's all but given up hope on Harvey, so she forces levity to cover up her feelings. "On the bright side, you fell asleep so quickly, it saved me from having to read you a bedtime story."

Harvey rolls his eyes. She's funny, but he can feel the tension. If only she knew what had been going through his mind minutes ago.

"Donna…that's not what I meant," he says, furrowing his brow. With his back to her, he turns his head to the side to explain.

"You of all people should know how I get when I'm worried. I haven't had a decent night's sleep in weeks… because I've been worried about you." He exhales and then continues. "I wasn't sure how you'd take what I told you. But you're going to be ok… so now I'm ok… that's what I meant."

Donna's eyes go wide, and the butterflies awaken her stomach. This is the third time in two days that Harvey has said something completely unexpected, completely "un-Harvey-like". His words were not a rejection of her, they were anything but.

Harvey was trying to show her more of himself, and now she feels guilty that she thought less of him. He might not have covered her with a blanket or removed her shoes, but he's been taking care of her just the same.

"I'm sorry, Harvey, I didn't realize…"

He cuts her off. "It's ok, Donna."

He pauses, then he asks, "How did you sleep?"

"Like a baby, actually." she says.

His head cocked, he throws it back at her. "Just what every man wants to hear when he wakes up to a woman in his bed." She can see a half-smile forming across his profile.

"Alright, I see what you did there, counselor." Donna can't help but smile back. She and Harvey definitely have a way with each other. "Now, what do you want to do on our last day besides eat, because I'm starving."

Harvey runs his fingers through his hair. His eyes are running out of places to hide. "Let's grab something on the way to my hotel so I can change, and then the Louvre? What about you?"

"Shakespeare and Company," she suggests. "It's a bookstore. Maybe get something to read for the flight home tomorrow."

"Sounds good," Harvey smiles, finally getting the nerve to glance in her direction. He still can't believe he spent the entire night lying next to her. The mere thought sends his heart soaring.

"And Donna" he adds, "We're going to do dinner right tonight, ok?"

xxx

As they descend the escalator inside the giant glass pyramid of the Louvre, Donna turns to him, "You were right, Harvey, I'm glad I stayed, so thank you."

"You don't need to thank me," he says, giving her a gentle nudge. "I should be thanking you. It's turned out to be a fun couple of days and I've hardly thought about work."

For three hours, the pair wander the endless halls of the world's most famous museum. They stroll through the Egyptian antiquities, several portrait galleries and an atrium of Greek and Roman sculpture.

Harvey is taken with paintings of Napoleon's military victories while Donna is mesmerized by the ancient sculptures, especially the Venus di Milo, the famous statue of Aphrodite, the Greek Goddess of Love.

Before leaving, they select some fun souvenirs for Harvey's niece and nephew, including a giant three-dimensional Eiffel Tower puzzle that he plans to build with them during his next trip to Boston.

For Rachel, Donna couldn't resist a gorgeous pair of lotus flower earrings, the design taken from the walls of an ancient Egyptian temple. After her conversation with Harvey yesterday, she's decided to book a trip to Seattle next month. These earrings will be the perfect gift for her friend.

"So, what did you think of the Mona Lisa?" Donna asks, as they stroll past the Louvre gates.

"A lot smaller than I thought, and… well, you're much better looking," he grins, once again testing the waters with a little flirtatious banter. "You really need a portrait."

"It's settled then, I know what I'm getting you for your birthday," she chuckles, taking his flirtation in stride. "And you can get me a life-size reproduction of the Venus de Milo for my office."

"Shame about her arms though. Goddess of love and a terrible hugger," Harvey volleys back, causing Donna to laugh out loud. Every time Harvey makes her laugh, he counts it as a victory.

"Considering you're quite the _cuddler_ at night…" A smirk on her lips, and a quick glance in his direction. "I'm not sure it would work out with you two in the long run."

Harvey is flustered, and Donna can see a slight blush growing across his face.

 _Was she awake? Did she know? She didn't push me away._

"Don't worry, I won't say anything," she teases, leaning in with a whisper. "It'll be our little secret." Harvey is not sure if she is talking about the statue or their sleepover.

Whatever she's thinking, Donna whispering words to him are an arrow into his heart. There's something about the way she leans in with her quiet voice that makes him feel like he's the only man in her world.

"For the record, I woke up with _you_ next to _me_ ," he contests, playing it cool while hoping to press her into showing him something, anything.

"I was being thoughtful enough not to wake you up," she reasons. "You're welcome."

He gives his head a shake and offers her a half-smile as they take in the scenery along the Seine. The riverbank is alive with artists selling their works, musicians playing and couples spending a lazy Sunday afternoon near the water.

Harvey's hands are in his pockets but his fingers are restless. Taking Donna's hand feels like the most natural thing to do. At least that's what his heart is saying, screaming actually. But when it comes to her, denying himself is also second nature.

Any other woman, he wouldn't think twice, but with her… it's just not that simple. He smiles inwardly at the irony that he's terrified to take her hand, when she's always had _him_ in the palm of hers.

xxx

From the outside, Shakespeare and Company bookstore doesn't look like much to be excited about. Old windows and doors, the front painted dark green with the shop name above highlighted in gold. Inside, visitors are treated to a maze of hallways, staircases and secret rooms packed top to bottom with books. New, used, fact and fiction. Shakespeare and Company is as much a museum as it is a bookstore.

Before entering, Harvey orders two coffees from the café next door, and delivers them to a nearby picnic table. The neighbourhood is lively with Notre Dame Cathedral on one side and a garden brimming with peonies, poppies and clematis vines on the other.

"Did you have a favourite book growing up?" she asks.

He knits his brow in thought. " _Catcher in the Rye_. Holden Caulfield was trouble. My kind of guy."

"Why am I not surprised," she says, giving him a dramatic eye roll.

"What about you," he asks?

"A Nancy Drew girl all the way. I've read all 56 books." She says proudly. "She solved every one of those mysteries wearing pretty shoes and a skirt."

"So she was basically a COO in training," Harvey says grinning.

"Something like that." Donna chuckles.

Watching Donna, her red strands glowing in the sun, Harvey realizes that this weekend has really brought him closer to her in a way that he never expected. She's one of the strongest women he's ever met, but seeing her here, in Paris, without the trappings of a New York City lifestyle, Harvey can't help but fall in love with her all over again.

Yes, in her casual clothes, she's pretty. Without her make-up, she's beautiful. And when she's not wearing those five-inch stilettos, she's down-to-earth. But he's discovering a woman who is more vulnerable than she has ever let on at the office, and in a strange way, it comforts him.

As they sip their coffees, Harvey can tell by the way Donna is fidgeting that something is on her mind.

"What's up?"

"Just some things I need to work out," she says, avoiding his eyes. "You know, I've never apologized for being who I am… but now I'm starting to feel regret over so many things."

"Like what," he asks?

"Thomas for one," she says, biting her lip.

… _and not putting myself first sooner_

… _and not trying harder for an acting career_

… _and not telling you how I really feel_

… _and Stephen_

… _and lying to you about that kiss_

"I always wondered…" he starts. "Do you regret giving up your acting career to work at the firm?" Harvey has always felt a little guilty about that.

She shakes her head… no.

"When I was 13, after my father went bankrupt, there was so much tension between my parents. Sometimes my mother would leave for days, saying she needed her 'space'. I would go anywhere to avoid going home – friends' houses, the library, coffee shops. And then I joined the school drama club. With acting, I could become someone else for a little while. It was my break from reality."

She looks up at him, and he nods, encouraging her to continue.

"Two years before I met you, Harvey, my parents divorced, and it was a mess. Mom shacked up with this accountant from her office, and Dad was devastated. My sister, Joy, and I were left to pick up the pieces. Joy couldn't take it so she moved to California, as far away as she could…and I was all alone."

"I'm sorry, Donna."

"So… as much as I like to think I'm adventurous, the truth is there's a piece of me that really isn't. And acting, well, it wasn't stable. Do I regret not trying harder for an acting career? Sometimes. Some days I really do. But I've never regretted meeting you."

Donna looks up at Harvey. He has a pained look on his face. So, like she's done a thousand times before, she tries to lighten his mood.

"And thanks to that _incredible_ deal I negotiated with my boss, I got to do all the plays I wanted anyway," she says, giving him a sweet smile. "Best of both worlds."

Harvey smiles back, but his eyes are sad.

"I knew your parents weren't together, but how come you've never told me all this?" He realizes he has so much more to learn.

"It's not exactly a happy memory is it? And given what happened with your family, I didn't think it would help you to hear it."

Once again, he realizes, she had put him first. "I'm sorry I never asked. I should have paid more attention, Donna. It shouldn't have ever only been about me."

He presses his lips together, and catches her gaze. Then Harvey decides to let her in on one of his secrets.

"I'm probably going to regret telling you this, but…" he pauses. "I've been to every one of your plays."

Donna's eyes go wide, lifting her eyebrows up along with them. "What?! How did I not know that?

With a small grin, he says, "I went once without you knowing and I kind of liked it…you not knowing… since you know everything. You think I haven't noticed that you've never once invited me?"

"I just didn't think it was your thing. I figured you always had something better to do than to watch your secretary try and recapture her youth," she explains.

Harvey shakes his head.

 _She really has no idea how I feel about her._

"So now the secret's out, why did you tell me?" she asks.

"Because if I had said you're talented, you wouldn't have believed me. Twenty-three plays, Donna… you could have made it in theatre…I just want you to know."

"You know how many plays I've done?" Donna is so touched by Harvey's words, she feels a lump forming in her throat. She wants to cry.

 _It's when you say things like this, Harvey, that make it impossible for me to not love you as much as I do._

"As for regrets, don't be so hard on yourself, Donna. You're human," he sympathizes. "We all have a few..."

 _Like not being there when Marcus was ill_

… _and not fixing things sooner with my mother_

… _and not fighting harder for you when you were fired_

… _and trying to take the firm from Jessica_

… _and sleeping with Esther_

… _and running away after telling you I loved you_

… _and dating my therapist_

… _and asking Stu to offer you a job_

… _and lying to you that I didn't want more_

… _and treating you terribly after that kiss_

Donna can tell by the strained look in Harvey's eyes, that this conversation is weighing heavy on him.

"I don't regret this coffee though, she quips. "It's amazing."

Falling into their old routine, he responds. "Still not as good as yours."

Donna leans back, tilts her head and looks him over.

"So let me get this straight… you think I'm prettier than the Mona Lisa and make better coffee than all the cafés in Paris?" her eyes twinkling.

"Let's not forget - a better hugger than that Venus girl," he says, the corners of his mouth turning into a smile.

Maybe it's all this intense time together, maybe it's being away from the office, or maybe it's just Paris, but Donna is really starting to wonder what is going on with Harvey.

"Are you flirting me, sir?" she asks, leaning in this time. "What's gotten into you?"

"Maybe I am," he admits. "Maybe there's something in the croissants."

"Except I heard tomatoes were your thing," she teases back.

"Well, thank your lucky stars we're not in Italy then," he smirks. "Next trip, maybe?"

"Alright, Casanova," Donna retorts. "Go find yourself something to read."

Before heading into the bookstore, Harvey turns to Donna, "Since it's our last night, I thought we'd go all out for dinner. I've got a little surprise for you that I'm pretty sure you're going to like."

"What? You're gonna stay awake through dinner tonight?" she kids.

And with a dramatic eye roll, he walks away.


	9. Chapter 9

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 9 - Please note, a little more graphic in places. This is a long chapter - happy reading!**

At 7 o'clock, the familiar knock echoes across Donna's hotel room door. She opens it to see Harvey dressed in her favourite dark suit and a new Hermès necktie.

"Well, don't you look handsome," she says looking him over.

Harvey steps in.

 _Oh my God, Donna._

He can't control what she's doing to his body right now, so he desperately tries, but fails, to keep his eyes above her neckline.

Donna is wearing the same sexy, black dress she had on the night he first came knocking.

"That dress, it's very… you look amazing, Donna. It was made for you."

Harvey is trying to be a gentleman, but all he can think about is how quickly he would take it off if he was given the chance.

Red hair, porcelain skin and black lace. He's not sure he's going to be able to last the night.

His eyes tracing her curves, he teases, "I think there are going to be a lot of French men trying to learn English tonight."

"Merci, Monsieur," she says, her eyes twinkling.

Then, sounding a little shy, she admits, "I didn't want my memory of this dress to be a bad one, so I figured if I wore it tonight, and we have fun, then it might cancel out the last time I had it on."

"We'll have fun," he promises, finding it sweet and also funny that Donna would think this way about a piece of clothing. Just one more quirky thing about her that he's now discovered.

"Because you definitely need to wear this dress again."

Donna takes a step towards him. Without thinking, she adjusts his tie and smooths his lapels. Her palms are firmly planted on his chest and they linger longer than necessary.

"I'm going to hold you to that," she says. Hazel eyes affectionately meeting brown ones.

Harvey is completely aroused now. It's only when Donna pulls away that he realizes he's also been holding his breath. Her in that dress, inches away from him is just cruel.

Completely oblivious to what she's doing to him, Donna grabs her clutch and asks, "So where are we going?"

He swallows to push down the sensation.

"You'll see. I have a car waiting downstairs."

xxx

"Ok, open your eyes."

"What?!" She looks up. "Here? Again? For dinner?"

"Yes. With the best view of Paris. No hot dogs, I promise."

Donna is so touched. She can't believe that Harvey would think to do something like this.

She had never mentioned it to him, but having dinner at the Eiffel Tower was something she very much wanted to do during her visit. After learning the restaurant has a six-month waiting list for reservations, she figured it impossible.

"I pulled a few strings at the hotel. A lot of strings, actually," he chuckles. "I thought we deserved one last night of fun."

"Harvey, I don't know what to say." Her affection for him swelling in her chest. "I've never had anyone do anything like this for me before."

"Good. Because I wanted it to be special, Donna," he says.

He pauses, then adds, "Something that no one else has done…for you… that you'll always remember."

"Well I've never had anyone fly to Paris on my behalf," she says, her eyes full of gratitude. "So I think you've got that covered."

Harvey gives her a shy nod. Then he extends his elbow, allowing Donna to link in.

"Ready?" he asks.

"I'm ready," she says, wrapping her perfectly manicured fingers around his bicep.

Upon entering the restaurant, Donna and Harvey are seated by a window overlooking the park where they had picnicked the day before.

"Oh my God, Harvey. Look at this view," she says. The setting sun casting a golden glow across the city.

Harvey smiles as he watches her reaction. Making Donna happy has always given him a sense of accomplishment. Her eyes are wide like a child's, navigating all angles of the view. Never taking his eyes off her in that exquisite dress, Harvey agrees, "It's pretty great."

After an incredible meal, a delicious sampling of desserts (Donna was happy to help herself to his), and plenty of fine wine, the pair wander outside to a private corner of the balcony, to take in the last of their Paris experience. It's a clear night. Moon and stars above and the City of Lights below.

Noticing the goosebumps on Donna's arms, Harvey takes off his jacket and holds it open. She slips in, and tucks her clutch into the pocket. Harvey leans his elbows on the railing, and turns to her.

"Thomas…," his lips pressed tight before continuing. "I'm sure that he cared… cares… for you. I don't want you to think that he didn't at all. You weren't wrong."

"Well it doesn't matter does it?" she says, letting out sarcastic chuckle. "I could never trust him now. And without that, there isn't much is there?"

"Why did you go out with him?" The question has played on Harvey's mind for months, and it's been the source of a lot of his sleepless nights.

Donna shrugs her shoulders. "Because I was tired of wanting and not getting." She gives Harvey an uncomfortable glance. "Thomas was certainly interested. I guess you could say he swept me off my feet. And… professionally… he was very encouraging. He wanted to introduce me to his business contacts here, thought I could benefit from networking."

Her answer lands like a slap to his face. Thomas led her to believe he was prepared to offer her everything… everything Harvey couldn't. Now he really understood what a blow it must have been for her to learn the truth.

Harvey can't take this anymore. After a few frustrated breaths, he turns his body towards her.

"Donna, I need to tell you something," he starts.

His eyes shift to the city and then back, buying him the seconds he needs to find his voice. "You said yesterday that you wanted to be someone's first choice… well… you've always been mine."

"I know."

First a slap to the face, and now cold water over the head.

"You know?" Harvey abruptly straightens up, his chin falls back, the whites of his eyes glowing in the dim light.

"That's why I resigned," she says, matter-of-factly, "You had to choose between what was valuable to you at the firm and your relationship. It wasn't fair to have you lose someone you cared about because of professional loyalty."

"Is that what you think?" As intuitive as Donna is, Harvey is stunned by her answer. "You think that I asked you to come back for the benefit of the firm?"

"It's ok, Harvey, I get it. The firm was just getting back on its feet. We needed stability," she says with a brave face, determined not to ruin what has, so far, been a lovely evening.

Donna's tone might be convincing, but she's certainly not fooling herself. Harvey calling in a favour from Stu, and her resignation, are very much open wounds.

"No Donna. That's not why… _everything_ is why… you're my first choice for _everything_." He holds his breath, waiting for her to process what he means, and terrified of what might come.

Donna's eyes suddenly become wide and her mouth drops open as what he is saying becomes clear. Shaking her head, her eyes moist, she backs away from him.

"How can you say that, Harvey? Zoe, Scottie, your last relationship…" Her fingers in the air, counting off his women. Her quivering voice giving away that she's not 'matter-of-fact' about any of it. "I was _never_ a first choice."

"No, it was _never_ an option…and that was _your_ decision _not_ mine." His frustration coming through with emphasis. "You made it clear we could _never_ happen, even after you broke your rule for… _Stephen_. Sure, I've had girlfriends. So what? You weren't the only one trying to ' _live their life'_ , you know."

Harvey's heart starts racing. Until now, he's been in control of his secrets. But here, at the God damn Eiffel Tower, all bets are off. He's sick of the tension between them, and tired of living in fear that one day he'll lose her. One way or another, he decides, it's going to end here.

"Let me ask you something." His voice starts off strong, but then gives way to exasperation as he counts off her men. "Mark, Mitchell, Stephen… Thomas, for Christ's sake. Were any of them _your_ first choice? Did you ever look at any of them and say, ' _this is it'_?!"

He's out of breath and the pupils of his eyes go dark as he zeros in for an answer.

Donna nervously bites her bottom lip and looks away.

"Tell me... were they?"

She turns and looks at him through wet lashes. Then gives her head the tiniest shake… no.

Admitting this to Harvey hits her hard. She's being backed into a corner, but she's certainly not going to let him to act like he's some sort of victim through all this.

"Why does it matter to you who I'm with? You've made it _very_ clear on more than one occasion that you _never_ wanted more anyway! You said you loved me and then acted like it was _all in my head_! Jesus Christ, _I kissed you_ and you treated me like I killed somebody… and then you team up with Stu to fix things for you….!"

She's shifting into high gear now, calling him out on his bullshit, and using his hurtful words against him.

"' _Promise me that will never happen again_.' Does that sound familiar, Harvey? Because it sure as hell does to me!"

" _Of course_ I said those things!" Harvey snaps back, trying to recover from accusations he knows are completely justified. "It's a lot easier to hear me say them than to eventually hear them from you!"

Once again, Donna's eyes go wide and her mouth drops open. That was unexpected.

The pounding in his chest is finding its way to his temples, and Harvey can feel himself losing his grip. His eyes are burning now and his jaw aches from clenching.

They're fighting. In public. At the Eiffel Tower.

All those first dates, marriage proposals and happy memories witnessed by this landmark… Harvey is convinced he is well on his way to accomplishing the exact opposite tonight.

Donna is also starting to regret the evening. They've spent two full days here and they still can't get their shit together.

 _Maybe this dress is just bad luck_.

For what seems like forever, they stare at one another, out of breath and out of words. Their minds scrolling through thirteen year's worth of denial, frustration and missed opportunities.

Harvey's hurt is on full display. His face is panicked, wetness pooling in his eyes as he nervously shifts from one foot to the other.

Donna bites her lip trying to quell the overflow of tears already finding their way down her cheeks. She catches their saltiness as they descend onto her mouth.

Then, she whispers, "You were my boss, Harvey, what was I supposed to do? I didn't want everyone to think I was some failed actress who became the cliché ' _secretary who sleeps with her boss'_. It was also your reputation I was thinking about."

Harvey exhales and his shoulders slump in resignation. Pressing his lips together, he gives Donna a small nod. He looks down at the city because he can't handle what he might not see in her eyes.

"It wouldn't have been that and you know it," he says, refusing to let her minimize the depth of his feelings.

"And if we had gotten together…," she asks gently. "Why would you think I would change my mind about you?"

"Because. I don't deserve you, and you'd figure that out," Harvey whispers back, his voice quivering as he takes a wary glance towards her. Years of pushing and pulling have come down to this.

"And you're….you're everything, Donna, _everything to me_. You don't even know how much…"

"Harvey…," she interrupts.

He's completely exposed now.

"You don't have to say anything…," he says, still trying to protect her, and protect them from never being able to go back. "I'm sorry, I just couldn't hold it in."

Donna draws out a long breath, allowing herself time to regain her composure. Her eyes are gentle on him.

"What I was going to say is that the Harvey _I_ know… is one of the kindest men I've ever met… caring and loyal and sensitive. Why would you think I could never feel that way about you?"

"You forgot to add complicated to that list." He looks up, his Adam's apple bobbing. "And you had your rule. For that reason, no doubt."

"Not for that reason, Harvey," she clarifies. "Even if we weren't working together, you weren't ready."

"No, Donna, maybe _you_ weren't ready. I would have tried if you had let me."

"Harvey, after you spent the night, you just left," she reminds him, taking him right back to where this mess started. "The next time I heard from you was when you asked me to come work for you… and you told me that you would have never come over that night if you knew we'd work together again. You were more interested in having me as a secretary than a girlfriend."

Harvey shakes his head, confused. He can see the hurt in her eyes.

"How was I supposed to take that?" she asks. "It felt like it didn't matter that much to you. Well, it mattered to me... "

Harvey is stunned. Clearly, that moment at the coffee shop has been eating away at her for years.

"I didn't handle it well, Donna. It's not how I felt…not at all. And you said to never mention it again, so I thought you regretted it. If I could go back…," he admits, his voice heavy with remorse. "You're right, maybe I wasn't ready the way you needed, but that didn't mean I didn't want it… and I tried to respect your rule."

He's out of breath and he's trying to read her face. Anything she can give him.

"We're different people now aren't we?" his eyes pleading. "And I'm not your boss anymore."

Donna is starting to feel frustrated. Is this going to end up like every other conversation about their feelings? Back to creating another twisted version of 'normal'? She's having none of that tonight.

"Harvey… we've been through this. What do you want?" she asks, her voice tired and strained.

Harvey takes a step towards her, his fingers fidgeting as he struggles to tell her what he needs her to know, and what she deserves to hear. Tonight, the two worlds he's desperately tried to keep separate are on a collision course, and he's risking everything.

Harvey takes a deep breath in and then out. He flew all the way to Paris for her, for them, and she's going to get the God damn truth.

"Donna… I love you… and before you say anything… " his voice soft, he's trying his best.

"You and me… I think about us a lot. More than you realize. Thirteen years, and I still think about our night together… and about when I told you I loved you. You were right and I know I screwed it up. I keep replaying you kissing me in my mind, and it always ends the same way… with me kissing you back."

He takes another breath, and presses his lips together. Donna can see fear and hope flicker in his eyes.

"There are so many times…" Harvey looks away, trying to put into words the feelings he's long held back, and then turns to face her.

"Dancing with you at the wedding…I didn't want that night to end. When I went to see Marcus, I missed you. I couldn't wait to hear your voice. And this morning… waking up next to you… you'd never guess by the way I reacted, but I would have stayed there all day in that bed with you if I thought you wanted me to."

Donna hasn't taken her eyes of him. She also hasn't taken a breath. Harvey is pretty sure he's rambling but he presses on, determined to leave no room for doubt.

"Look, these feelings aren't new… I love you, I'm in love with you… I don't even know what the right words are… but I know how I feel….It's not going to change and I don't want it to change. That's why it never works out with anyone else, Donna, because we belong together. We always have. It's going to work so give this a chance... I just want to make you happy…"

Donna reaches for the railing. She needs it to steady herself because she's actually dizzy. They've skirted around their feelings for so long that she's having trouble believing what just came out of his mouth.

 _Did he just say that he loves me?_

… _that we belong together?_

… _that he wants to make me happy?_

Donna makes a conscious effort to breathe. She can see that Harvey's chest is rapidly rising and falling. It took a lot for him to get here, and his words have left him anxious. She also knows that Harvey would never allow himself to risk everything unless he was more than certain.

What's unexpected are her feelings. She's both elated and terrified. As frustrating as their dynamic has been over the years, it's one she's familiar with.

Tonight is different. They are not playing with cards close to their chests. In fact, Harvey has laid the entire deck out on the table, and Donna is unsure how this round is supposed to go. She searches his face for a hint of uncertainty, but she can't find it.

"I need to tell you something, Harvey. The truth is…," She pauses, nervous to expose the one secret that has given her a semblance of control over this thing between them. "I lied after I kissed you….I…"

Before Donna can finish, Harvey's hands are holding her face as carefully as he would a newborn. Hopefulness washes over his features, his eyes pooling with affection. Bringing his mouth to hers, he gently awakens her lips. It's barely a kiss, but enough of one that Donna knows he's left her to take the lead.

At first, she's tense, not expecting such a bold move. But his hands and his mouth and his eyes… Donna can't help but relax into him. Ever so gently, with eyes wide open, she gives him the go ahead. First to his bottom lip, and then slowly moving to his top, before completely dedicating her mouth to his.

Any second now, she expects Harvey to step back, reassess, maybe even apologize. It is Harvey after all. But he doesn't. She feels a hand slip under the coat he's given her. Warm fingers splay across her bare back, drawing her closer. Another hand firmly cradles her head.

With her own two hands now weaving their way through his hair, Donna presses his face to hers, giving him a taste of what she wants to happen. Sensing her readiness, Harvey leans in, set to deliver himself in whatever way she will have him.

The thought of Donna claiming him as her own makes him lightheaded. Like he's flying and falling all at once. His heart is pounding like thunder now.

Maybe it's the rush of no longer denying himself. Maybe it's the thrill of seeing his future unfold before him. Or maybe it's just because she's so damn beautiful.

Whatever it is, Harvey doesn't fear it. In fact, he's daring it to come at him full force. Every thundering beat tells him he's never been more alive or more certain.

Harvey's hand continues to explore the soft skin on her back. His palm is excitement, his fingertips frustration because he just can't get close enough. Her warm mouth caressing his is far beyond what his dreams have ever been capable of. So he presses for more, desperately tasting away what's left of her lip gloss.

Thirteen years of pent-up emotion, finally set free. Then, the groundswell hits him.

Wave after wave washes over him, undulating and powerful – love, desire, adoration – he's soaked to the bone.

Harvey is taking Donna with him now and her knees go weak. He holds her firmly in place. His mouth giving her breath as the wave comes crashing.

To steady herself, Donna draws her hands across his white dress shirt, grasping at the fabric along his chest. They are moving in slow motion and spinning all the same.

Each time she welcomes his tongue into her mouth, Harvey deepens their kiss, moaning at the taste of red wine on the tip of hers. His fingers are now tickling her neck, caressing her face and running wild in her hair.

Then breathless, they force themselves apart.

Donna slowly opens her eyes. Her stomach still doing pirouettes as Harvey's eyes are intense on hers. It's not a lustful look, she'd recognize that. Instead, she sees adoration and relief.

She licks her lips. They're instantly cold with him away. The sensation is overwhelming.

"Don't stop," she whispers.

Harvey pulls her in. Gentle thumbs glide across her bottom lip and tender fingers hold her face to his. His mouth is slow, intentionally slow. There's a depth to this kiss that make her eyes water.

 _Oh my God, Harvey._

She doesn't bother to open her eyes this time. His arms are wrapped solidly around her now, so she rests her head on his shoulder. Harvey senses a shift in her energy and pulls back to look at her. He's waiting for the doubt that he knows is coming.

"Harvey. This weekend, Paris and wine tonight…," she tries to reason as she searches the night sky for answers. "You might feel very differently about this when daylight hits and we're back in New York."

Harvey tilts his head and gives a slight chuckle. "Thirteen years? Not going to happen, Donna," he assures with a kiss to her forehead. "I know what you're doing. You're trying to give me an out. I don't want one."

Wrapping her arms around Harvey's waist, Donna, once again, rests her head on his shoulder, inhaling the comforting scent of cedar, sandalwood and him. Silent and swaying, they hold each other.

This healing hug reassures her. His mouth on hers says "I love you", but his arms wrapped around tell her, "I've got you". And she needs both.

Donna responds with a long, slow, deep kiss that sets Harvey back on his heels. He fully expects his heart to explode. Everywhere she touches now sets him off, creating an urge that leaves him wanting to tear her clothes off.

Donna senses his excitement against her thigh, and it forces a rush of heat between her legs. "Harvey…" she says, pulling away to slow things down. There's a sincerity in her glassy eyes that he knows well.

"I _really_ love you."

Another wave of relief washes over Harvey's face. His eyes also damp. Words he's waited forever to hear from her.

"I _really_ love you, too," he whispers, "and… I think we _really_ need to get out of here."

Staring at one another, there's a calmness, an understanding on both their faces as this new reality sets in.

Harvey pulls his phone out of his pocket and texts the car service. With fingers intertwined, the pair make their way back into the restaurant and towards the elevator.

As they wait for the lift, the mâitre d approaches with a knowing look in his eye.

"Madame, Monsieur, this is your first time in Paris?"

"Yes it is," Harvey obliges.

With a wink and a smile, the gentleman hands Harvey a bottle of wine. "Enjoy your evening."

Their hands still linked, Harvey and Donna giggle as they enter the elevator.

"Just when I couldn't love this town more," she says.

At the bottom, Harvey opens the car door and helps Donna in. He rounds the back, enters from the other side and immediately slips his hand back into hers. To think that just a few short hours ago he was terrified to reach for her hand, and now, it feels like the most natural thing in the world.

Ever the gentleman, he makes no assumption about where this night will take them, so he turns to her.

"Ok Donna… what's next?"

A smile warms her lips. She knows he's not just asking about tonight, but about tomorrow and the days after that.

"Oh, I have plans, she says, as she gives his hand a small squeeze. "But for tonight, how about we go to your hotel to collect all your things and then to mine."

Harvey leans in, places a light kiss on her cheek and whispers in that soft voice reserved just for her.

"I'd like that."


	10. Chapter 10

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 10**

It hasn't been thirty seconds since they've entered her hotel room and Donna already has him pinned against the door. Harvey is throbbing with excitement, to say the least, but he's also a little surprised. He'd tell her as much but her mouth won't let him.

Donna doesn't realize this, but what she's doing to him, against this door, is straight out of his "Donna" fantasy playbook. So, the fact that Harvey doesn't want to think about sex right now is a bit of a shocker.

Even though he's had rules around sex, he's always been a "yes man" for a beautiful body. For his past rendez-vous, he'd often mix cocktails with a little sweet talk. This would inevitably lead to just enough flirtatious banter to explore whether he could put his naughty words into action. From there, it was all about timing and making the right moves, which Harvey had down to a T.

He was never selfish. Harvey never intentionally led anyone on. In fact, some women found his directness to be a turn on. Engaging in this mutual exchange had always come easy, as long as the expected results didn't require him giving too much of himself.

Harvey has never considered himself to be a player either. He respects women, always has. His mentor is a woman, for God's sake. But if they'd ask him to show vulnerability, to give more, he just wouldn't, no matter how lovely they were. It was nothing personal.

And it's not like Harvey hasn't tried to have a real relationship. He's made the effort with a few. But in truth, he's never really tried that hard. None of them were her, so what was the point?

Now, it's been exactly one hour since he's laid his mouth on hers. The first time, that night long ago, he was consumed by lust. Her pink lip gloss a shiny toy that just had to be played with.

The second time, when Donna dared press hers to his, it blew him wide open. The taste was candy apple then, tempting him away from everything he thought he wanted. He was furious, and she still thinks his relationship was why. But when she reached for him, that was the furthest thing from his mind. That relationship was over the second her lips awakened his.

Now, he's third-time lucky. It was all him this time, tasting the mouth he's known forever. These are the lips that have sung his praises when he's done right, and comforted him when he's lost faith. They've brightened his days with a million smiles and have staunchly defended him when there's been a threat. On more than one occasion, he's also felt their wrath, spitting angry words his way when he's gone too far or has disappointed.

Harvey figures it's some sort of miracle that she's here in his arms. That this very same mouth has just declared she " _really_ loves him". His heart is so full, it's about to explode. He has no playbook for this, and he feels ashamed for even thinking he needs one. All he knows is that screwing this up is not an option.

What Harvey needs tonight, what he craves with Donna is something he never imagined he was capable of – the closeness and intimacy that only comes with truly being in love. He knows it exists because he's witnessed it with Mike and Rachel.

With Donna, it's within reach. He's ready to lay himself bare for her, confess his secrets and show her that he's deserving of the magic she's brought to his life. And this is why sex is secondary right now.

Donna, meanwhile, has other ideas. Even though she feels a little unsteady on her feet, she's fully pressed against him, and she can feel that he's very happy about it. Maybe it's the wine or the mind-blowing hour of his mouth on hers that has made her this way. Whatever it is, she doesn't care. Harvey loves her, and she is so very ready to show him how much of a first choice he's always been.

That's why her teeth are tugging on his bottom lip and her hand is tugging on his necktie.

"Careful," Harvey mumbles into her mouth. "This is my lucky tie."

She giggles as he draws her back to arm's length to look her over.

"And I take it this is your lucky dress now?" His smirking mouth smeared with lip gloss.

Donna leans back in, and seductively bites her lower lip. "Actually, it's my, ' _you're-about-to-get-lucky',_ dress."

Harvey gently pulls her closer, arms around her waist, pupils dancing between her eyes and mouth. "I'm already lucky." And he means it. Then with eyes closed, he delivers the gentlest kiss to her smile.

Donna's hand is still on his tie. Harvey knows she has other ideas, he can see it on her face, but there is an urgency in her kiss that plays on his mind.

Every molecule in his body is screaming to take her to bed, so, even he can't believe it when he utters these words…

"Maybe we should slow down a little."

Donna instantly leans back, her heart sinks and she feels a nervous twinge in her stomach. "You're not sure." She's stating it as fact.

"What? No. I'm _very_ sure, I haven't been this sure about anything in my life," he promises, dropping his hands to hold hers. "The other day you mentioned feeling fragile. I don't want to rush this. I want to do this right, Donna."

Fear washes over Donna's face, the worries she forced down earlier this evening are once again bubbling to the surface. Maybe they got carried away tonight? Maybe he's still not ready?

"I know what you're thinking," he says. His eyes narrowing as his hands firmly hold hers. "Stop."

"Are you worried about me or are you worried about you?" she asks.

"I'm not worried and I'm not going anywhere," he assures her. "But you're… you're different. This is different."

Donna presses her lips together and then with a long exhale, she lets out the anxiousness that's been building.

Her eyes start to water as she thinks back to the first time they found themselves like this. Back then, he was all, "you're into me" and "we could do it with whipped cream" and "what are we waiting for?" They teased and flirted and played, but by morning he was gone.

Now he's putting her first. And he'll wait.

"I did say that, and I did feel that way… " she admits, squeezing his hands. "But Harvey Specter telling me he loves me changes everything." These words set her heart fluttering.

Donna brings her face to his, giving him a gentle kiss of her own that melts his mouth into hers.

Trying to recover, he slowly opens his eyes and takes a breath.

"Well… Donna Paulsen telling me that she loves me _also_ changes everything." Harvey's body shivers at the sound of his own words. "I _also_ don't want to mess this up."

Donna sees the concern on his face. She gazes at him thoughtfully, and with a tiny smile says, "Ok, Harvey."

"Ok?"

Donna nods as she takes in this honourable man in front of her. Once again, he's trying to show her something and this time, she sees it.

"How about tonight…" she offers, her hands gently clasping his. "You just be Harvey and I'll just be Donna, and we can relax about the rest. Let things happen as they're meant to."

Harvey nods, relieved that she trusts him. He's still trying to process the 180-degree turn his life has taken over the last hour.

"So you'll be Donna? What if I want to be Donna?" he teases, the corners of his mouth releasing a slight smile as he wraps his arms around her waist.

She laughs back. "Ok Donna, what do you want to do tonight… Cards? Netflix? Paint your nails?"

Harvey rolls his eyes. "Take off your shoes."

"My shoes?" He's caught her off guard.

"You can be Donna, but you don't get to keep the shoes," she quips.

That earns her a chuckle from Harvey. She quickly steps out of her Louboutins and sets them next to the Oxfords he's just removed.

Donna has dropped a good four inches in height, and Harvey notices how petite she actually is when he steps towards her. Pulling out his phone, he taps open a slow jazz playlist and extends his hand.

"Dance with me."

Donna's smile spreads across her face as she accepts it and steps into his embrace. Harvey gently draws her in, his hand across her bare back, and they begin to sway.

Although he's holding her in his arms, there's a part of him that still can't believe this is happening. He's never experienced this kind of contentment before, and it's a little overwhelming. This is the beginning of the future he's secretly wished for, but never thought possible.

Donna has to catch her breath. The feeling of being in Harvey's arms is intoxicating, and she's going with her heart on this one. Harvey was telling her the truth, the right man has found her and tonight marks the start of her forever relationship.

"Harvey," Donna says, bringing him back down to earth. "You said that you've thought a lot about the night we spent together. What did you mean?"

"You know what I meant," he says, feeling sheepish.

"A lot? Like how often?" She leans in closer, she's curious.

"Enough times a lot. A few times a week a lot." Harvey knows he's never going to hear the end of this.

Donna stops moving, a mischievous smile on her face. "So… we've had sex hundreds of times in your head?" She's giggling. "No wonder you're always tired. I would have brought you more coffees if I'd known I was responsible."

Harvey rolls his eyes and shakes his head, he loves that he can forget himself in her playfulness. Pulling her back in again, they start to move.

This time his cheek is resting on the side of her head. Donna's hand feels soft, delicate, and it fits perfectly into his. Harvey notices it's the same with their bodies. Even as they're swaying, they just fit, like two halves made perfectly whole when they come together.

After a minute, there's a whisper in his ear. "What am I wearing… when you think about that?" She's teasing him again.

"Donna," he sighs at her line of questioning, a blush rising on his face. "You're pretty much naked. Sometimes you're in my dress shirt. And you're beautiful…like now."

Harvey can feel her sink deeper into his hold. Her warm breath tickling his neck.

"What's the best part…?" She's really putting him on the spot now.

Harvey leans back and looks at her with eyebrows raised. "This is not the conversation I imagined having with you tonight." He doesn't fear it though. If anything, it's freeing.

"If you have to know…" his voice is low as he gives her one of his signature smiles. "We're in my bed and we're close."

"That's the best part?" she asks.

Then his features turn solemn. "The best part is you telling me you love me, and that you'll never leave."

Donna can see the vulnerability in his eyes. He's entrusted her with something so personal that it cuts to the core of who he is. He could have confessed a million other things, but he chose to tell her this. Donna touches his face, the confidence in her gaze assures him that she's not going to break his heart.

Harvey pulls her in close, his cheek to her head once again. They sway quietly for several minutes, taking in the soulful trumpet of Miles Davis.

Then he whispers in her ear. "So, all these years, you've never thought about it?"

"Of course I have." They are long past denials and playing games now. "A lot."

Harvey's eyes light up as they move. He never expected to hear that.

"What was I wearing?" he teases back.

"Let's just say naked Harvey pairs very well with naked Donna."

 _Oh my God, Donna._ Just her words arouse him.

"Do you want to know my favourite part?" she asks.

"Yeah," he says in the softest voice. His eyes now closed again as they slowly rock back and forth.

"Waking up with you holding me."

A lump forms in Harvey's throat. Now that his eyes have been opened in Paris, he understands this about her. She might appear fiercely independent, but her heart has been longing for love.

Harvey thinks back to this morning, when she awoke with his arm around her. He realizes now why his reaction hurt her feelings.

"You know, I wasn't really asleep this morning," he admits, letting her in on another secret. Then he pulls away to see her expression. "I knew my arm was around you, but I wasn't sure how you'd react."

Donna tilts her head, a small smile on her lips. "Yeah, you weren't the only one who was awake."

 _This woman._ Harvey shakes his head in disbelief.

"We really are a couple of idiots, aren't we?" Donna giggles as she rolls her eyes.

It's well after midnight when the pair finally decide to call it a night. Donna is already in the bed when Harvey comes out of the bathroom in his Harvard t-shirt and boxers. He notices she's wearing the same champagne-coloured silk nightgown she had on this morning. Just the thought of waking up to her like this every morning excites him.

"Alright, mister, get in and keep your hands to yourself," she smiles. "Honestly, I'm surprised you were able to respect my rule for so long, because I'm having trouble respecting yours, and it's only been a couple of hours."

Harvey lifts the covers and immediately draws her closer to him.

"I've added a kissing clause," he deadpans. "A perk of the job."

Harvey's fingertips touch her face, his thumbs run across her mouth. Then he leans in for a long, slow sensual kiss that sends an electric current along her spine, into her stomach, and down her legs. Just as she comes up for air, he follows with a second and then a third. Tongue, lips, teeth, Deepening his kiss each time.

She's breathless. "I swear to God, Harvey, I've never been kissed like that in my life. "

"Neither have I," he whispers back. Then Harvey leans back on the pillow and smiles.

"What?" She's facing him, her arm under her head.

"Just thinking back to the day I met you," he says. "You told me it was my 'lucky day because I get to meet Donna.'"

"Did I really say that?" She chuckles. "Wow, I was good."

"You were right," he states. "That _was_ my lucky day."

"Mine too." Her smile mirroring his. Then her eyes go wide. "But, tonight… tonight was something else." Although she's lying down, Donna's legs go weak at the memory of Harvey leaning in to her at the Eiffel Tower.

"It was," he agrees. "Best day of my life."

Harvey pulls Donna towards him, wrapping his arm around her as she rests her head on his chest. There's an easy silence between them now. Thirteen years has given them that. The comfort of knowing one another so well that they can just lie quietly together.

Then, Donna remembers. "We didn't open that bottle of wine from the restaurant."

"Let's save it," Harvey suggests.

"For a special occasion?" She throws it out there to see what he'll say.

"Maybe our six-month anniversary?"

"I thought you weren't one of those people who celebrates silly anniversaries," she challenges with a tilt of her head.

"I'm not," he says. "But with you, it's different. Everything is different."

Donna settles her head again onto Harvey's chest. Before closing her eyes, she looks up.

"Harvey, I love you and I'm not leaving."

Her words take his breath away. She loves him and she's "got him" too.

"Thank you, Donna," he whispers.

Gratitude spills from his eyes and he doesn't need to explain. She just knows.

 _Thank you for not giving up on me._

… _and for making me a better man._

… _and for giving us this chance._

… _and for loving me back._

Donna gives a small nod. Her eyes glistening too, as she feels her own heart swell.

"Goodnight, Harvey"

"Goodnight, my love."


	11. Chapter 11

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 11 - The chapter is close to an M category, mature audiences only!**

Wrapped in a crisp white bedsheet, Donna slowly opens her eyes to find a pair of deep brown ones inches away from hers. She can't help but smile.

Seeing she's awake, Harvey leans in for a kiss. She can tell he's also smiling.

"I love you." His first words.

"Wow, a kiss, and an 'I love you' first thing in the morning." Her voice is still sleepy.

"Making up for lost time," he says, as the sun peaks through the curtains.

"Well then, good morning, beautiful," Donna replies, still trying to get used to this new-found closeness they have. These overt romantic gestures from Harvey are quite a surprise.

 _Was he this way with the others or is it really different between us?_

This is also quite a change for Harvey. They haven't even had sex yet, and he's never felt this kind of intimacy before.

As badly as Harvey wanted to be with her last night, he's relieved they didn't go too far. There's been a lot for both of them to take in this weekend, and he's determined to not make any more mistakes with Donna.

Propping his head up on his elbow, Harvey asks, "So… are you my girlfriend?"

"I'm pretty sure I'm something after the way you kissed me last night," she teases, her red hair messy across the pillow.

"Girlfriend doesn't feel quite right. Lady friend, maybe?" A sly grin on his face.

"Ewww, that's a booty call name," she says, scrunching up her nose.

"Girl Friday?"

"Been there, done that."

"Companion?"

"I'm not a Golden Retriever."

Harvey chuckles and continues.

"Partner?"

"Too corporate."

"Best friend?"

"Too platonic."

"Lover?"

"Do you want everyone picturing us having sex, Harvey?'

Harvey cocks his head trying picture it, and earns himself a smack to the shoulder.

"Partner in crime?"

"Bad idea. You're a lawyer."

"Better-half?"

"Completely true, but it makes us sound old."

"Sweetheart?"

"We're not twelve, Harvey."

"The love of my life?"

Silence.

Just hearing Harvey say those words overwhelms Donna, and her eyes begin to water. In her heart of hearts, he has always been hers. But to hear it from him, about _her_?

 _Love. Of. My. Life._

This is more than an "I love you". He's set her apart. He always has. This really is different.

Donna is rarely at a loss for words, but she is now. Her eyes trace Harvey's face, intent on capturing this special moment between them. She smiles at the sight of his dimples and laugh lines, high cheekbones and strong jaw, those cute moles on his temple and the sincerity in his chocolate brown eyes.

She pictures him in his fine suits with that mischievous smile. Teasing and cursing and pouting and yelling.

She reflects on his admirable work ethic, the risks he takes, his principles and generosity. And she considers his fearlessness despite those insecurities, which, at times, have nearly crippled him.

This is Harvey. _Her_ Harvey.

"You ok with that?" He asks, not wanting to push.

"More than ok." Donna agrees, instantly pressing her face to his. Harvey doesn't ask what's going through her mind. But something tells him it's good.

"Harvey?" she whispers.

"You _really_ love me." he guesses.

"How did you know I was going to say that?"

"Donna… am I that to you?" he asks. Old insecurities die hard.

"The love of my life?" Her smile showing through her eyes, she nods.

"Are you ok with that?" she asks.

"More than ok." he whispers back.

xxx

Donna and Harvey have the better part of the day before their flight. Harvey heads for the bathroom and Donna calls the front desk to request a late-check out.

When Harvey returns, he sits along the edge of the bed.

"You sure you don't want to keep me company in here?" Her tone a little playful and her eyes a lot seductive as she pats the empty spot next to her.

"I won't keep my hands to myself if I do. You don't make it easy." he warns. "I haven't even asked you out on a proper date yet."

Donna shuffles across the bed and sits next to him. Adjusting the falling strap of her nightgown, she turns to him. Her hand on his leg.

"On our first date, you took me to this cute little café for dinner. I wasn't the best company, but you stuck with me anyway. Walked me right to my door that night, but not before asking me out again."

A curious grin forms on Harvey's face.

"Our second date…," she continues. "Well, I was impressed. Like a perfect boyfriend, you spent the entire morning shopping with me. Never complained once and then you carried all of my things."

Harvey chuckles at the memory of their fun visit to Hermès.

"Our third date was pretty sweet," she says, looking at him through thick lashes. "We had this amazing picnic, and you gave me your sweater and a hug when I needed it. Then, we spent the afternoon talking and laughing... at the top of the Eiffel Tower, no less."

"We've been dating this entire time?" Harvey asks sarcastically, his eyes wide. "How come no one tells me these things?"

Donna giggles and continues.

"You made a day of it on our fourth date. First, to the museum and then to a little bookshop I wanted to visit. I have to say… I kind of knew I liked you then," she says playfully. There's a sly smile on her face, both of them knowing full well what it's taken to get them here.

Harvey takes her hand, links his fingers with hers and holds on tight.

"Like a gentleman, you showed up for our fifth date in your best suit, for a dinner that I will never forget… and then… you told me you loved me." Donna's eyes are twinkling.

"I did," Harvey whispers.

"And if that wasn't enough…" she adds. "you just _had_ to remind me that you're a great dancer and an even better kisser… "

The tug in Harvey's chest makes its way down to his boxers. He presses his lips together and swallows. His pupils, intense and wanting, darken as his eyes fixate on hers. Donna feels the heat of his gaze straight through to her core. And he can feel hers… heart thumping, blood rushing, veins throbbing… he's not fighting it this time.

Without saying a word, Harvey cradles her head with his hand, fingers weaving through her wavy red locks. He draws her in for a kiss that continues for at least three good heartbeats. Then he pulls away and searches her face, his hungry eyes asking.

Donna nods. A small gesture instantly marking the end of one chapter and the beginning of another.

Harvey reaches for the thin strap of Donna's nightgown and slowly slides it back down her arm. Bringing his mouth to the spot where the silk once lay, he delivers the first of a dozen gentle kisses across her shoulder and along her neck. Her porcelain skin is cool and delicate, just like he's imagined and just like he remembers.

With every carefully placed kiss, her hot breath urges him on. In turn, Harvey breathes her in, inhaling the exhilarating trace of last night's perfume and the scent that is uniquely her.

Donna can't help but close her eyes at his touch, so she leans her head to the side, encouraging his exploration. With every shift of his tongue, her skin tingles hot then cold, until his mouth is on her again. The sensation leaves her knotting her fists in his t-shirt, firmly grasping it and wanting it gone. Harvey can tell that she's losing herself with him, and he deliberately holds back, but gives her just enough, until she can't take it anymore.

When she pulls away for a breath, he obliges. It's as much for him as it is for her. There's nothing gentle about the way she tugs at the fabric and he likes it. Within seconds she casts it away, and he flinches as her fingertips take hold of his bare skin.

There are still no words between them. Just eyes. Hers… trusting, seducing, loving. His… certain, wanting, adoring.

Seeing him shirtless, his shoulders strong from nights spent in the ring, Donna has to catch her breath. This feels both familiar and new. Harvey is as physically attractive as ever, but the man he is today is far sexier than she remembers.

It's a sexiness that comes from experience. From mistakes made and the self-awareness that follows. There's a confidence, an honesty and readiness about Harvey now that excites her. There will be no handling him with kid gloves. This morning, with her heart and her body, he's going to feel the full force of her love.

Taking him back to that night long ago, Donna brings her lips to linger on a very special spot at the centre of his chest. It's a gift of sorts and Harvey knows exactly what she's doing. He watches as the wetness of her tongue caresses his chest and her hands graze his nipples. She's barely touched him, but the rush leaves him thirsty and panting for more.

Now, she's kissing his neck. Her delicate fingers mapping the muscles across his back, red nails gently forging a trail. As her lips travel up to meet his, her hands, once again, find his front, and Harvey's eyes roll back into his head. Her warm tongue claiming him over and over again, while tender pads tickle his chest and ribcage… caressing, massaging, exploring all the way down to his boxers.

When Donna's fingertips tease the elastic, he's lightheaded. With every touch, he deepens their kiss. His hands holding her head just so, as he sets a rhythm with his mouth. Her palms are all over him now and they're unrelenting. Then, she gently brushes the front of his boxers, and he can barely hold himself back.

Without breaking their kiss, Harvey pulls her towards him with an intensity that surprises them both. She can feel his heart pounding against her chest, and like that familiar knock on her door, she's ready to let him in.

Hands running circles in his hair, swollen lips urgent across his jaw. In his dreams, this is about the time when he takes her. But he won't. All he can think about is her. Pleasing her, satisfying her, making her happy.

Harvey slides his hands along her thighs to rest at her waist. Donna gives an approving moan as intentional fingers glide over silk, tingling their way up and down and back and forth. Lower back, inner thighs, stomach and breasts. When his warm hand finally strokes her nipple, she trembles.

Seconds later, her nightgown meets his t-shirt. Skin to skin, Harvey holds her so tightly she can barely breathe. They're both pulsating now at the need to be closer, to make whole what has been fractured for so long.

With a breath, Harvey slowly opens his eyes. They worship her.

Pushing away from the edge, Donna shuffles back to the centre of the bed. Her lace bikinis and the heat of her gaze calling him over.

"You're beautiful." He's breathless as he kicks off his boxers and reaches for her.

"So are you," she whispers, her arms drawing him in.

"I brought protection." he says, a slight grin on his face. "I was hopeful."

"Then we're both prepared." Her sultry eyes possessing him. "But some of this… there's no protecting you from."

He understands her words. Sex, he can handle. This? This is something else.

First, his lips meet hers, then his body follows. There's a familiar warmth when his abdomen touches hers, heat where her pink nipples catch his firm chest and sparks as their tongues continue to taste one another.

Shivers run down Harvey's spine as Donna trails her fingers along his back. His weight is heavy on her, so he leans on his elbows. As he brushes her hair from her face, her gaze reaches deep inside of him.

This is a first for Harvey. This is what it feels like to make love and it consumes him. He and Donna have seen one another at their best and at their worst, and they're still here, loving each other.

"Donna, before we go any further, you need to know," he confesses. "This is it for me."

"I know, Harvey," adoration pooling in her eyes. "It's always been you, too."

And with that, they both let go, giving all of themselves and giving in to the love they've known forever.

xxx

"I have to say…" Donna's hand is on his bare chest, her skin still glowing from their lovemaking. "I do love this Naked Harvey. Even better than the one in my dreams."

"Good, You'll be seeing him more often," he deadpans as he slowly pulls the sheet around them. His body still recovering from all the ways she had him.

"Will I also be seeing that fireworks display again?" she asks playfully, her hand traveling along the nape of his neck.

"Three fireworks displays, if I recall." He grins, feeling quite satisfied with himself. Harvey had never imagined that sex with Donna could feel even better than that first time, years ago, but it does.

It's midday, and their Paris adventure is nearly over. Despite their many declarations of love, Donna can't help but feel a twinge of nervousness.

She presses closer to Harvey, secretly hoping the bubble they've been in doesn't burst when they get back home.

"It's going to be ok," he assures her, sensing that she's unsettled. "This is right."

"What if it doesn't work?" Her voice is laced with insecurity.

"We'll always have Paris?" He jokes. Donna rolls her eyes.

Then, his voice is confident. "It will. When I got here I told you I wasn't leaving and I won't, ever."

Donna takes a deep breath. "I'm just nervous about how things are going to be when we get home. This is a big change."

"We'll figure it out. Besides, we're going to be busy."

Donna leans back, expecting to hear something naughty from his mouth, but he surprises her again.

"Our six-month anniversary." He kisses her palm.

"Christmases and Thanksgivings." His thumb caresses her cheek.

"Birthdays and vacations." A reassuring kiss to her lips.

"Little league and ballet recitals?" he asks, his eyes hopeful.

"Everything." She can't help but smile.

Harvey takes a deep breath.

"Everything," he agrees.

xxx

" _SNAP!"_

The sound of their seatbelts locking into place signals a new beginning that's been thirteen years in the making. As the flight attendants prepare for take-off, Harvey turns to Donna.

"Want to have one last bit of fun in Paris?" he asks, a mischievous smile on his face.

"There will be no mile-high club," she warns. "Those bathrooms can barely fit one person let alone two."

Harvey laughs, and rolls his eyes at her as he pulls out his cellphone.

"Kiss me," he says.

Donna is not sure what he's up to but she obliges. With eyes closed, she locks her lips to his. Harvey moans at the sweet taste of her lip gloss. In that second, she hears the click of his phone…a perfect picture of Donna kissing Harvey.

"Now watch," he says as he types a text to Mike and Rachel.

"Greetings from Paris, wish you were here…..not!"

With the picture attached, he hits send and then promptly turns off his phone.

"Harvey, it's a seven-hour flight, you're going to kill them!" she teases.

"I think our phones are going to blow up when we turn them back on again," he giggles.

Taking her hand, Harvey links his fingers with hers. Then he turns to her.

"Donna, we've spent a lot of time together over the years, but this has been, by far, the best weekend of my life," His eyes filled with love for her.

"And this is just the beginning," she says with a raise of an eyebrow. "I have plans."

"I think I'm scared," he quips. There's a smile on Harvey's face that reaches all the way to his eyes. He can't wait to find out.


	12. Chapter 12

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 12 - Just a couple of naughty words here folks. Happy reading!**

 _ **Text #1**_

" _WTF! ARE YOU SHITTING ME!?"_

Eggplant emoji!

Eggplant emoji!

Eggplant emoji!

 _ **Text #2**_

" _Called 10 times. Answer your damn phone!_

 _Jesus. At least you kissed her back this time._

 _Wait. You did last time too…"_

 _Eyes emoji!_

 _ **Text #3**_

" _Couldn't be happier, Batman._

 _Call me when you're not having sex._

 _Never mind. Call me anyway."_

 _Eggplant emoji + Thumbs Up emoji._

"So I got 10 calls and 3 texts from Mike…," Harvey chuckles as he scrolls his phone."Eggplant emojis are good, right?"

Donna's phone has also been buzzing since she's turned it on.

" _Tried calling you! IT'S ABOUT TIME! You two are meant to be together. I can't wait to hear all about it. You deserve the best. Say hi to Harvey! Love you & miss you. "_

Heart emoji!

Kiss emoji!

Heart emoji!

"I have five calls and a very sweet text, minus the pervy emojis, from Rachel," Donna replies. "Rachel says hi and I owe her a phone call."

Harvey turns to Donna as they wait for their luggage. "It's only been a few days, but it feels like a lot longer since I left New York," he says, as he gives Donna a kiss on the temple, his hand gently sitting at her waist.

"Well, a lot has happened. I have to say, Mr. Specter, I never took you for being so affectionate," she says, leaning in to accept the kiss. "It's going to take some getting used to."

Donna and Harvey step out of the airport to find Ray waiting. He greets them both and takes their bags as Donna slips into the plush back seat of the Lexus.

Ray notices that Harvey looks years younger, a marked difference from when he dropped him off just four days earlier. "Welcome back, Harvey. Good trip?" he asks.

"Thanks, Ray… the best." Harvey responds with a single nod of his head, and Ray offers him a knowing smile.

In the back of the car, Harvey immediately takes Donna's hand, loosely linking his fingers with hers. He turns to her, not completely sure what to do next.

"Now that we're back home, I don't want to assume anything…" He's looking at her cautiously. "But maybe you could stay at my place… or I could stay at yours? I promised Louis I'd be in first thing, so it's going to be an early morning for me either way."

Donna smiles to herself. She can feel a warmth rising across her chest. It didn't even occur to Harvey that they would not wake up together once they returned. This really is going to take some getting used to.

"How about my place?" she suggests. "I have a full day of meetings, so I'll be going in a little later. Besides, maybe it's best we don't go in together just yet."

xxx

Donna unlocks her apartment door and pushes it open as Harvey follows her in with their luggage. He takes a deep breath as he passes the gold "206" at the entrance. He's really only been to her place a handful of times, and with the exception of that God-awful dinner party with her mother, it's always been because he's needed something.

The last time Harvey saw those gold numbers was no different. It was all a blur after he found her resignation letter on his desk. Her words jolted him like a bolt of lightning.

"Dear Harvey…Effective immediately, I, Donna Paulsen, hereby resign from the firm…". He panicked and without a second thought, immediately severed the tie he needed to.

The next thing he knew, he was staring at her with glassy eyes, ripping up that piece of paper right in front of her face. Harvey was sure this gesture made clear his priorities, but as he'd come to learn in Paris, there were so many things he's gotten wrong all these years.

As he enters her apartment, Harvey scans the space, taking in all the changes. It looks nothing like he remembers. There's no doubt that Donna has great taste and an eye for design, the place looks like it's straight out of a magazine. But it's also a bitter reminder of how far apart they had grown in the past year, and how much has changed in her life without him even being aware.

"I know you mentioned the renovation to me, but this place looks completely different… You did a great job," he says, a little relieved that he still recognizes the sofa. "It's a lot more modern than I thought you'd go for."

"Thanks, Harvey," she responds, as she sets her keys down on a small glass table near the entrance. "I was ready for a change. It took me a while to get used to it, though."

Harvey can't help but wonder if he was responsible for her need to make such a drastic change. If this renovation was her way of removing herself from the past, and from the space where so much had gone on between them. He tries to push the guilt away.

Although they've spent the better part of a day travelling, it is still relatively early in the evening in New York. Harvey is feeling the effects of the long flight and he can see that Donna is also tired.

"You hungry or can I pour you a drink?" he asks as he lightly massages her shoulders. His touch instantly relaxes her.

"I'm good. What about you? And there's scotch on the cart over there," she says, pointing towards the window, the lights of the city twinkling in the distance.

"I'm fine, but let's have a drink," he offers, as he walks towards the cart. "Our first night together in New York, that's worth celebrating."

Harvey pours them a couple of drinks, lays them on the coffee table and motions for Donna to come sit.

Donna drops down at the end of the sofa as she tries to navigate this new energy between them. Sitting close, Harvey pulls her legs over his lap, and she can feel the warmth of his hands on her knees.

Donna has to admit that seeing Harvey in her apartment like this does feel a little strange. There isn't the tension that's accompanied his past visits, and she catches herself waiting, almost expecting it to come.

Taking a deep breath to shake off the feeling, she tries to reminds herself of what Harvey has shown her over the last two days.

 _This is different, everything is different._

Watching her, Harvey furrows his brow. He notices her mind wandering and is not sure how to read the expression on her face.

"This all feels very… new, doesn't it, in your apartment?" He remembers their history here and he feels it too.

The last time he sat this closely to her was on this very sofa. It was years ago, and just the thought of that night makes his insides churn. He made a mistake then, a big mistake in a moment of weakness. He knew he had to leave because he was afraid of what he might do, but he couldn't help himself, he told her anyway. Told her he loved her and then he ran away.

Harvey has lived with that regret for so long, that he's having trouble believing it's all magically in the past. Now they're here, together, and she loves him. He needs reassurance that it's all true because he never, ever wants to go back to what they once were.

"It feels a little different," Her voice shakes him from his thoughts. With a sweet smile, she adds, "But I can get used to seeing your pretty face in my apartment. "I think I'll keep you."

"Good." Harvey exhales and offers a smile in return. Just what he needs to hear.

"Harvey, I don't think I've said this before… thank you for coming to Paris. I'm not sure you'll ever know what that meant to me. What you did… it's changed our lives, you know?" Donna can feel her eyes getting damp as she tries to come to terms with what has been the craziest weekend either of them has ever experienced.

"For you, I would do it again in a heartbeat, but it should have never come to that," he admits, shaking his head. "I should have never pushed you away when I could have fixed this. It's my own damn fault."

Clearly frustrated with himself, Harvey lets out a deep sigh.

Seeing his expression, Donna reaches for his hand, and gives it a light squeeze. As she's done so many times before, she holds him with her gaze, her eyes not letting him retreat into himself.

"Before we go any further, we need to be clear about something, right now." Her words are firm but her tone is gentle. "We've both made mistakes, Harvey. We both weren't ready before. And we both deserve this now."

His lips pressed firmly together, he acknowledges her words with a small nod. Sipping their drinks, they sit quietly for a minute, each lost in their own thoughts.

Then Harvey turns to her. "Now that we're back home, maybe we need to start over?"

Donna tilts her head, curious as to what he's thinking.

With the corners of his mouth forming the tiniest smile, and his eyes sincere, Harvey puts out his hand as if to shake hers. "Hi I'm…"

Donna interrupts, batting her eyelashes. "I know who you are, you're Harvey Specter, and today is your lucky day."

"Why is that?" he asks playfully, laugh lines forming around his eyes.

"Because today is the day you get to _kiss_ Donna." She leans towards him with her teasing.

Harvey's eyes go wide. "Wait a minute, I don't recall it going exactly like that…"

"I recall you being _very_ ready, willing and able…" she quips.

"Still am," he flirts back, his darkening pupils lasering in on hers.

Donna cocks her head, knowing that Harvey is always game to flirt. Holding up her glass she says, "I'd like to propose a toast… to forgiveness, to new beginnings and to fireworks."

"Fireworks?" Harvey asks, as they "clink" their glasses.

"This morning?" she gives him a knowing stare. "It's been a long day, Harvey, but it was _just_ this morning that you _more than kissed_ Donna."

"Oh I remember… definitely fireworks," he says, his voice going seductively low. Sometimes he can barely keep up with her. But she has this way of making him feel lighter and he loves it.

"And you've also given me something else to think about every fifteen minutes." He's actually not kidding.

Donna shakes her head because those words are exactly what she'd expect from him, and she loves that.

Harvey leans towards her, his eyes adoring what he sees. They share a gentle kiss, but it's not the kind of expectant, hopeful kiss that new lovers share. It's one of those slow, lazy, comfortable kisses that long-time couples engage in. On the surface it might look like a routine sign of affection, but when their mouths meet, they both taste the familiarity, commitment and trust that only comes with a shared history.

"C'mon, let's go to bed," Donna says as she stands and pulls Harvey up.

As she leads him by the hand to the bedroom, she jokes, "What are the chances that we can go back to Paris next weekend?"

"We can go back any time you want, but I'm going mudding with Louis next weekend."

Donna stops in her tracks, quickly turns to face him and pulls on his hand.

"You're what?" Her eyes are as wide as saucers.

"That was the price I had to pay for taking off so quickly to save your ass." His tone telling her it's all been worth it.

"Mudding with Louis?" Donna knows this is an off-the-charts sacrifice for Harvey. With a smirk, she says, "You must _really_ love me. Can I watch?"

" _No_ , you can't watch. I might have to medicate myself first," he warns. "And yes, I _really_ love you."

xxx

As they're getting ready to call it a night, Harvey heads to the kitchen to leave his wallet and keys on the counter for the morning. As he pours a couple of glasses of water, he notices Thomas Kessler's business card sitting next to the coffeemaker, and his mood instantly changes.

 _Bastard._

Harvey knows that relationship is very much over, and he recognizes that he's being irrational, but the sight of it unsettles him. His instinct is to throw it away, but he also knows it's not his place to do that.

As Harvey walks back into the bedroom, Donna notices a change in his demeanor as he sets the glass on her bedside table. His shoulders are slumped and she can tell there's a distance in his eyes.

"You know, Louis could have roped you into doing worse than mudding. You're getting off lucky," she says, sensing he's unhappy.

"That's not it…" he confesses, feeling sheepish.

"What's wrong?" she asks, as she sits up.

"Just saw Kessler's business card in your kitchen." He quickly glances at her, almost embarrassed that he's so affected. "I know it shouldn't bother me, but it does."

"Oh." Donna raises her eyebrows in surprise. She hops out of bed, and within seconds, returns with the card in her hand.

"This one?" she confirms, holding it up.

Harvey's back is resting against the headboard. Jaw tensed, he nods.

Wearing nothing but a navy blue negligee, Donna walks straight to his side of the bed. She stands alongside it, her eyes firmly locked on his, and proceeds to rip the card in half. Then she tears it into quarters and promptly throws the shreds into the garbage.

It's not lost on Harvey that Donna is doing to the business card what he did with her resignation letter, and it comforts him. This is one of the many reasons why he loves her so much. She understands him enough to do exactly that. To know just what he needs.

Harvey's eyes follow her as she gets back into bed. He turns on his side to meet her as she lifts the duvet.

"Better?" she asks, her eyes pooling with affection.

"Much," he admits as he swallows. "I'm sorry, Donna. It might take me a little while."

Donna leans into Harvey. His face in her soft hands as she delivers a warm, reassuring kiss to his mouth. She's always sensed that the men in her past have affected him, but she's only now realizing just how much.

"I'm sure I'll have my issues too..." she says, knowing that Harvey has no idea how deeply his dating history has affected her over the years.

"You realize that you have always been and will always be my first choice, right?" Donna treats him to one extra scoop of assurance.

Harvey nods as he nestles closer to her in bed, their legs tangled as he pulls her in.

"And you've always been mine." He never wants her to doubt him again.

Tonight, they are sharing Donna's bed for the second time. And while they might easily fall into it, they're also realizing they can just as easily fall into the old habits and insecurities that have hurt them in the past.

"Just keep reminding me and I'll keep reminding you…" she whispers.

"...and we'll be ok," he whispers back, finishing her sentence.

Drawing her face to his, Harvey delivers a deep and passionate kiss that rushes through Donna's body. He moans when she presses herself against him in response. Just inches away from her now, he tickles her cheek with his nose, and whispers in her ear, "What are the chances that I can _more than kiss_ Donna again?

She leans back to look at him, and giggles, "I think they're _more than good_."

Within seconds, Harvey pulls his t-shirt off and his phone begins to buzz. He quickly reaches for it to find another text from Mike.

" _You haven't called. You better be having sex_."

Harvey shakes his head and replies…

Eggplant emoji!

Flame emoji!

Heart emoji!

…and then he powers off his phone.

.


	13. Chapter 13

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 13**

It's just before seven in the morning when Harvey steps off the elevator. The place is quiet, and he's relieved. He was determined to make it in early so no one would ask about the bouquet of peonies in his hand. Ray was kind enough to pick them up from the florist last night, to save Harvey from searching for a last-minute, convenience store variety this morning. He knows Donna probably wouldn't care, anything from him would make her happy, but, for her, the everyday kind just won't do.

Stepping into her office, Harvey's eyes immediately zone in on the white vase from Thomas. The limp rose is all but dead, its yellow petals now brown along the edges.

 _Good_.

Harvey knows it's petty, but that doesn't stop him from placing his giant bouquet right in front of the tiny white vase, completely blocking it from view. Then he props the small card in front, _"Welcome back. I hear it was pretty special. - H."_

As he makes his way back down the hall, Harvey is surprised to see Louis flying around the corner, briefcase in hand.

"Harvey! Welcome back. I thought we're meeting at 7:30?" He asks.

"We are, Louis. I just wanted to get a jump on a few things before then," he replies.

"Everything good?" Louis asks, noticing that Harvey looks unusually calm and rested.

"Everything's good, Louis," he agrees with a certain nod, but not ready to offer anything else.

"Great! Looking forward to our meeting… and to our weekend." Louis is way too energetic in the morning for Harvey's taste. "Trust me, you'll feel like a new man after mudding."

"I'm sure I'll feel like something, Louis," Harvey responds, his voice is dripping with sarcasm as he steps away to head down the corridor.

On the way to his office, Louis passes Donna's and he sees the giant bouquet on her desk. It confirms what he had already suspected. When Gretchen distributed the updated client list last Friday, Louis noticed that Thomas Kessler and Associates was notably missing. At first, he thought it was an error, but Gretchen confirmed otherwise. He was going to call Thomas but decided against it since he figured it had something to do with Donna. And, today, Louis sees a happy, rested Harvey plus flowers on Donna's desk, and it all adds up.

xxx

Wearing a tailored, white sheath dress and carrying her new pink Hermès bag over her shoulder, Donna exits the elevator and steps onto the 50th floor. It's been nearly a week since she's been away, and she feels like a completely different person.

As confident as she comes across at the office, there's always been something missing deep down. A void, an emptiness in her heart that she has never been able to fill. And after thirteen years, she's become a master at hiding it, of pushing it somewhere that's almost unreachable.

At the office, Donna has perfected the routine of exuding confidence. Every morning, just before the elevator doors open, she takes a deep breath, draws her shoulders back and gives her head a little shake. Then, with her hands tightly gripping whatever handbag she has that day, she steps off, poised, self-assured and very Donna. She's ready to do battle. Not with Harvey, but with her feelings for him.

The last time Donna pulled that elevator move, she was dating Thomas, and even though she had high hopes for that relationship, she never felt settled the way she does now. Her hopes for Thomas were never enough to cancel out her very strong feelings for Harvey. This morning has been quite interesting though. She forgot herself after stepping off the elevator. She just walked out happy, really happy.

Donna also takes note of how strange it feels to have something so significant happen to her while no one at the office has any idea. She feels like a bit of an imposter. And she thinks about Mike, and what it must have been like for him to walk these halls, carrying his secret for so long.

 _How did he manage it, all that time, without losing his mind?_

Donna's thoughts then turn to Harvey, and she wonders if he's feeling the same. If this change between them has affected his day the same way. Even though they've both come to terms with their feelings, Harvey has always had his own way of dealing with his emotions and, because old habits die hard, Donna is a little worried how they'll manage their office relationship. Will he overcompensate and keep her at arm's length or will he be upfront and tell everyone?

This morning, Donna finds herself both missing him and relieved she hasn't bumped into him yet today. These mixed feelings confuse her and so to reassure herself, she pulls out her phone.

" _Good morning! Just got in. Is it weird that I miss you?"_

Seconds later a reply.

" _Not weird. Miss you too. I'm out of the office right now. See you tonight xo?"_

" _It's a date xo"._

Donna breathes a sigh of relief and puts her phone away.

 _You just saw him two hours ago. It's fine. Relax!_

As Donna makes her way down the hall, her first stop isn't her desk, but the corner office of the Managing Partner. Sitting with his back to the window, the morning sun streaming in, Louis is busily pouring over a stack of documents. Donna quietly leans against the door frame before speaking.

"Do you know how many varieties of French wine have your name on them? You really should visit France, you're practically royalty there," she quips, as she pulls a $200 bottle of Louis Jadot Pinot Noir out of her bag.

Louis instantly looks up, his eyes wide and affectionate as he greets her with his toothy grin.

"Hey Donna! Welcome back. How was your trip?"

"Well, great actually, but not what I expected. I can definitely say that."

"I saw Harvey this morning," Louis says, not wanting to pry but making it clear he understands. "Not sure what happened to him, but there's definitely a spring in his step."

"Really…?" Her eyes twinkling, a sly grin forming on her face.

"I take it things worked out the way they were supposed to?" Louis asks.

"Yes, Louis, they did. You were right about that." Donna steps in with the bottle. "Maybe I'll tell you all about it one evening over drinks…and speaking of drinks… "

She places the bottle on his desk.

"I brought this for you and Sheila to enjoy after the baby arrives. It also comes with babysitting when you're ready… so you two can enjoy a night to yourselves."

"Thank you," Louis replies. "We'll definitely take you up on that."

"Great. Let's catch up soon Louis. I've got a full day ahead of me," she says as she turns to walk away.

"Donna," Louis calls, his eyes full of fondness for his friend. "You look really happy."

"Thanks Louis, I am." Her smile saying it all.

xxx

As Donna walks out and heads towards her office, she slows her pace as she spies the large bouquet on her desk. She can't help but smile to see the beautiful vase of her favourite flowers... fuchsia, pink and white peonies.

 _Harvey_

Reading the sweet note, a flutter tickles her stomach. These are the butterflies that only come around when she thinks of him.

"Gorgeous flowers. That's quite the boyfriend you got there." The voice at the doorway startles Donna. She looks up to see Samantha standing there, a smirk on her face. "I'd say Thomas is pretty smitten. You went from a single yellow rose to a stunning bouquet all in one week. Nicely done."

Samantha's presence is a surprise, and not a welcome one at this moment. As she steps in and takes a seat, Donna takes Harvey's card and casually tucks it into her bag.

"Sorry, Samantha, you just caught me off guard. I'm still getting over the jet lag and now I've got a ton of work to catch up on." Donna shuffles the files on her desk, hoping Samantha gets the hint.

"So…you don't even have a minute to spill anything juicy? Did you two have dinner at the Eiffel Tower like you hoped?" Samantha wants details.

"It was a great weekend, and so was the Eiffel Tower, but can I take a rain check?" Donna suggests, trying to look rushed as she pulls together her files for associate interviews. "I have back-to-back meetings today and I've got a report due in the morning." That second part was a lie, but Donna is _not_ going talk about her weekend, especially since she and Harvey haven't even discussed how they would let the office know.

"Ok. I'll leave you to it. Maybe we can grab a drink after work one of these days," she offers.

"Sounds good," Donna replies, a tight smile on her lips as her eyes carefully follow Samantha out.

Donna takes a deep breath, and then leans over to inhale the fresh scent from her lovely flowers. As she does, she notices the small white vase sitting behind them. Thomas's business card left Harvey unsettled, and she wonders if he saw the vase this morning.

Donna determinedly tosses the vase into the trash, along with all the lies and false hope that went with it.

Before heading to the conference room, she pulls out her phone and texts Harvey.

" _I love my flowers, thank you."_

 _Heart emoji._

Within seconds of sending, he replies…

 _"I know they're your favourite. Dinner tonight? My place? I'll cook."_

Donna responds…

" _I'll bring dessert"_

Harvey texts back…

" _Excited about dessert. Sleepover?"_

 _Eggplant emoji._

 _Heart emoji._

Donna giggles.

" _You're really getting the hang of this emoji thing. Mike has created a monster."_

Harvey responds with an entire row of ridiculous emojis, leaving Donna laughing as she heads down the hall.

Walking into the conference room, Donna gives her head a shake in an effort to put her game face back on. She's always prided herself on being a professional, but today she's finding it hard to concentrate. Her mind is flooded with questions about the future, especially how they're going to balance their lives at home and at the office. It's something she needs to talk about with Harvey tonight, and she hopes they can agree on what to do. Just like Harvey has been cautious on the personal front, Donna wants to be sure they handle the professional side just as carefully.

 _How will we work together now?_

 _Can we leave our personal lives at home?_

 _How do we tell everyone?_

 _What will they say?_

 _What will they think?_

So many questions….

xxx

By late afternoon, Harvey is back at his desk, trying to put the finishing touches on a merger deal that shouldn't be taking as long as it is. When it comes to his job, he's always had a strong work ethic, and an uncanny ability to put everything aside and just focus on the day's work. But not today and never when it comes to Donna. He's been staring at the same piece of paper for five solid minutes with no recollection of what he just read. Today, he just can't stop thinking about her, and about them. His mind flooded with images of smiles and red hair and bedsheets and legs tangled.

It's one of the reasons he's avoided Donna's office all day. He's uncertain how he might react, not sure if the change between them will be written all over his face. Yes, their new dynamic has definitely thrown him off. He knows they'll figure it out, but he just needs this one day at the office to get his bearings.

As Harvey forces himself to reread the same paper for the fifth time, his cell rings.

"Well look at that, he actually answers his phone!"

"Mike. I was going to call you first thing, but it was two am in Seattle, and you're a bear without your beauty sleep. I couldn't do that to Rachel."

"Forget about Rachel, let's talk about the sleep you haven't been getting lately."

"Alright Mike… What do you want to know? And I'm not giving you any details."

"Well, first of all… that picture…Harvey Specter does not send pictures like that. What the hell happened to you? Either you're in deep or Donna slipped something in your scotch."

Harvey chuckles. "Maybe both... I guess being away for a few days has had an affect on me… Remember that conversation we had at the bar after Donna kissed me? You said she was the one..."

"I remember, and you looked at me like…"

Harvey interrupts. "I'm only going to tell you this once… You were right. I've known it for a while, but I was afraid to admit it to myself."

"I'm sorry Harvey, this must be a bad line, can you speak up?" Mike is determined to enjoy every second of this conversation.

Harvey rolls his eyes as he leans forward on his desk. "You heard me."

"So, how's Donna with all this?" his tone suddenly earnest. "We had all but given up hope on you two. Rachel said Donna was dating that hot furniture guy?"

Mike's take on Thomas irks Harvey, but he lets it go. "I'm sure you'll hear the rest from Rachel... but we're good… happy…really happy, actually."

"Harvey… glad you sent me that picture. You belong together… and you both deserve this."

"Thanks Mike. You and Rachel are the only ones who know right now… so if that picture ends up on even one of the eight hundred apps you have on your phone, I will hurt you."

"Yeah, Harvey… gotta go, there's some stuff I need to delete…," Mike chuckles back.

Harvey grins. He's forgotten just how much he enjoys talking to Mike. When they do, they always seem to pick up right where they left off. Harvey makes a mental note to not let too much time go by before they speak again.

"Hey man… I miss you, it was good to catch up." Mike says, his tone sincere.

"Well, I wanted to talk to you about that. I thought I'd surprise Donna with a weekend trip to see you guys. Maybe next month?"

"That would be great, I'll talk with Rachel about the details."

"Sounds good. And Mike… it was good to talk to you, too. Stay out of trouble."

Harvey has all but given up on the merger documents. He needs a change of scenery, so he gathers up his papers and decides to leave. Before he heads to the elevators, he walks by Donna's office. He just can't help himself and hopes to see her face, but she's not there.

Looking through the glass, Harvey notices the tiny white vase is gone. He exhales and smiles to himself.

 _Good._

"Beautiful flowers, aren't they? Donna's man is quite the boyfriend." Samantha says as she sees Harvey staring into Donna's office. "Gorgeous, smart and successful… he's definitely a keeper."

"Looks like it," Harvey says as he moves towards the elevators, annoyed that Samantha thinks Thomas is still in the picture. He decides that he and Donna need to sort out this office thing sooner than later, because he's not sure how much longer he can stand hearing about that asshole Thomas Kessler.

As he waits for the elevator, Harvey pulls out his phone. Even though their relationship is new, it feels strange to him that he would leave for the day without telling Donna.

" _Missed you at your desk. Heading home. See you tonight xo"_

xxx

As the workday draws to a close, Donna gathers her files for one last meeting. Her office smells like a spring garden, the peonies have bloomed even bigger than this morning. This first day back was incredibly busy and Donna realizes that although they have texted throughout the day, she really missed not seeing Harvey.

It's not lost on her that this is quite the turnaround from the last year, when her days were spent trying to avoid him and trying to move on with her life. Donna turns back to her papers when her phone rings.

"Hello, sweetheart."

"Hi Dad… how are you?" Donna is a little surprised to hear from her father as she's typically the one to check in. A Jim Paulsen telephone call usually means he wants to bounce one of his harebrained schemes off of her. "Everything ok?"

"Everything's fine. I'm coming to the city on Friday for a couple of meetings, and I thought we could meet for dinner," he suggests. "Thought I'd stay with you for the night and then head back home on Saturday?"

"Yes of course, and dinner sounds good… Dad… I have some news," She hesitates for second, and then decides to put it out there. "You remember Harvey? It's a long story... but we're together… It's new, and it's important to me. I'd like to invite him to join us for dinner."

There's a silence on the line.

"Your boss Harvey?" he asks, his tone less than impressed. "Bachelor Harvey?"

"He's not my boss anymore, he hasn't been for a long time, Dad." Donna already feels defensive.

"Is he still a ladies' man? I thought you were dating that furniture design guy…Thomas, was it? Weren't you just in Paris with him?" Jim's voice is laced with concern. He was encouraged to hear about Thomas, hopeful that Donna finally met a good man to settle down with.

"Well that didn't work out… and Harvey is _not_ a womanizer. I know you've had your issues with him, but you need to trust me, Dad. I haven't been this happy in a long time."

"Fine, bring him along, but I'll be honest, I'm worried you're going to get hurt. Men like Harvey…" Jim warns.

Donna cuts him off. "I'm a big girl, Dad. I know what I'm doing. Harvey's not what you think. I'll see you Friday."

"Ok. Love you, sweetheart. See you then."

Donna is suddenly anxious and her stomach is doing summersaults. She already has a lot to talk to Harvey about tonight. Now her father coming to town is another layer to pile on. Even though they've crossed paths over the years, Jim and Harvey are not exactly friends, or even friendly for that matter. In fact, there's been no love lost between them after Harvey threatened to put a stop to her father's business dealings when he tried to involve her.

Her father and Harvey are the two most important men in her life. Donna is hopeful they can make peace, or at the very least, find a way to get along for her sake.

After all, Harvey is the love of her life. He's not going anywhere... and neither is she.


	14. Chapter 14

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 14**

"I need a drink."

Stepping past Harvey's door, Donna doesn't mince words as she hands him her purse and drops her dress bag across the foyer table. She lets out a long sigh and quickly pushes the door closed behind her. It's been a long day, and her worried mind is exhausted.

"I also need..." Without a second's warning, she quickly steps towards Harvey, her arms wrapped around his neck, and places an urgent kiss on his mouth. Harvey raises his eyebrows in surprise. He has no choice but to stand there, her large pink purse cradled in his arms.

As she deepens her kiss, pulling him towards her, he's unprepared for the intense jolt she forces down his spine and into his groin.

 _Jesus, Donna…_

Donna's lips brushing against his and her soft hands running circles through his hair are becoming too much, so Harvey drops the bag and pushes her back against the door. Pressing his body against hers, he's now setting a rhythm with his mouth, kissing her back with the same intensity she started with.

As Donna relaxes into his hold, he slows their kiss, so they can both catch their breath. Harvey can't help but smile. He missed seeing her today. Donna moves her head aside to look at him, his chocolate brown eyes full of affection for her.

"Are we starting with dessert then?" Harvey teases, the taste of strawberry gloss on the tip of his tongue.

"I'm sorry I got here so late. My meeting ran long and the traffic from my place..." Sensing she's a little stressed, Harvey takes her hands in his.

"It's not late. Hope you're hungry enough for a steak dinner though?" Harvey asks, as he moves to collect Donna's things and place them on a barstool.

Then, reaching for her hand, he guides Donna to the sofa and pours her a glass of red wine from one of a dozen bottles purchased in France.

Kicking off her shoes, Donna curls up next to him as he takes a seat. Sipping from her glass, she lets out a long exhale and rests her head on his shoulder. This, on Harvey's sofa, is another first. Visits to his place have never been social.

"Steak dinner? I'm impressed. I had no idea my boyfriend can cook," she says with a smile. "I think I might have to take full advantage of that."

"Well it's grilling, it's not really cooking," he says with a vague recollection that he was once schooled about this.

"Seriously? That's silly, OF COURSE it's cooking!" She rolls her eyes at the suggestion. "And I can't wait to taste all your hard work, so let's eat." She immediately stands up and offers Harvey a hand up.

Smiling, Harvey takes Donna's hand and kisses it.

"What?" she asks, noticing the amusement on his face.

"You're just so… _you_ , that's all."

Donna follows Harvey into the kitchen to help serve the steaks, roasted potatoes and salad that he spent the evening preparing. She notices that the cactus she had given him is no where to be found. A twinge of sadness hits her, but she doesn't mention it. With Thomas having been around, and knowing what she knows now, she can't blame Harvey for wanting it gone.

They move to the dining room table and Harvey raises a glass to toast.

"To the first of many dinners cooked by your personal chef."

Donna giggles. "I'll drink to that!"

Donna and Harvey spend the better part of an hour eating and talking about their first day back at work. They laugh about the growing pains of having Louis as managing partner, and Donna downloads about her latest challenges in interviewing new associates.

But Harvey doesn't want to talk about work. At least not the business-related stuff.

"I bumped into Samantha when I was leaving," he starts. "She thinks you're still with Thomas."

Donna sighs. "I know. She came by my office this morning asking about the trip. She thought the flowers were from him."

"So when are you going to tell her?" he asks, wanting to make official what they've started.

"I don't know Harvey….How are we going to do this?"

Harvey's eyes go wide. "How are we going to do what? Just tell her and anyone else who asks." He lets out a frustrated sigh. "You know, I've always been the one accused of complicating things, but you're making this harder than it needs to be."

"We're senior staff, Harvey. Maybe we'll just tell everyone the next time we vote on something." Her tone sarcastic. "Not to mention… I left for Paris with a client and came back with a name partner. For anyone who's ever doubted my professionalism, I don't look exactly stable, do I?"

"Are you actually serious right now?" Harvey cocks his head and he can feel the back of his neck getting hot. "Once people know the deal with Thomas, they'll understand. Is this about your professionalism or do you just not want everyone to know about us?"

"Of course not," Donna says, raising her voice. She feels defensive and she doesn't understand why. "I just don't know how to handle both sides of our relationship at the office. And you're going to need some patience, Harvey, not everything goes according to your schedule."

"Well, Mike and Rachel managed it! No one said a damn thing when Jessica and Jeff got together. She was managing partner and he was a subordinate." Harvey is making his case and he's frustrated that he even has to. "And you had no problem handling it with Stephen. So… is this really a problem, Donna? Or is it something else?"

"So you're going to bring Stephen into this? That's not fair, Harvey. That's _exactly_ why I'm nervous. Stephen didn't reflect too well on me either, did he? And I'd like to think this is a thousand times more important than that. I don't know how I'm supposed to handle this… at work today, I felt out of sorts."

Harvey lets out a sigh as he leans back in his chair, his arm resting on the table. Shaking his head, he stands firm.

"Well, it threw me off, too, and I needed time today, but I don't give a shit what anyone thinks. We can handle this… You know what I can't handle?" His eyes zeroing in on hers. "You not being sure and things going back to the way they were… that's not going to happen."

"I _am_ sure. I just need a few days to get used to this without everyone at the office knowing about us." She states. "Because once they do, it changes everything."

"No… what _changes_ everything is that we love each other…and that we're together. And that has nothing to do with the office." His voice is calmer now. "Do you think they haven't noticed all these years? Do you honestly think this will come as a shock to Robert or Samantha or Alex?"

Donna's eyes are suddenly watery, and she's trying to hold back tears. "It's not about you, Harvey. I just need a few days…for me… without anyone at the office knowing. Because it _will_ change things for me. It's not anything more than that. I just need to get my bearings."

Harvey softens. He can't stand to see Donna cry, and leans across the table to wipe the tear from her face. With a sigh, he concedes.

"Ok, Donna, if that's what you want… we've already waited this long. I guess I'll just keep flirting with all the ladies at the office so no one is suspicious." A sly grin forms on his face.

"Just until Monday," She chuckles as she wipes a stray tear from her cheek. " And I'll do the same with all our handsome lawyers."

Harvey traces Donna's face with apologetic eyes.

"I'm sorry I got defensive. It's just…if I have to hear anyone else mention Thomas…"

"It's over. Why does it upset you so much?" Donna's had other boyfriends and it never seemed to affect him this way.

"It's not him really," Harvey admits. "When you were with him though, I realized you were moving on without me and I couldn't stand it."

"Did you ever think that maybe Thomas had to show up for us to get here?" Donna empathizes.

"You really are a philosopher aren't you?" Harvey is feeling calmer now. She has a way of making sense when he feels unsettled.

""I didn't mean to hurt your feelings," she says. " I just need a couple of days. That's all I need."

Harvey leans over for gentle kiss, and then Donna changes the conversation to a happier topic.

"Dinner was delicious, by the way. Where did you learn to cook like that?" she asks.

"Marcus is the real chef, but when I first moved out on my own, I cooked a lot," he explains.

Harvey heads to the kitchen and returns with two spoons and a container of Chunky Monkey ice cream.

"I take it this is dessert?" he asks.

"Well the first part…" There's a seductive look in her eyes.

"So… how quickly can we get through this part?" He asks on behalf of his inner teenage boy.

For years, Harvey has avoided touching Donna, knowing that maintaining a physical distance was the only way to keep himself from losing control. And now that they're together, he can't help himself, his hand always seeking a connection. When she's near, Harvey finds himself reaching for her hand or touching the small of her back or stroking her arm.

Sitting on the couch, their shoulders and thighs touching, the pair share Donna's favourite ice cream. Then Harvey suddenly gets up. "I got you something."

Donna tilts her head, curious. "More? You made dinner… and the flowers today."

Harvey returns with a silver box tied with a blue ribbon. Donna looks at him and then the box. She doesn't know what to say.

"Open it," he insists.

Donna unties the ribbon and lifts the cover to find a key attached to a miniature rose gold Eiffel Tower. She gasps.

"Is this what I think it is?" Her wide eyes getting teary once again.

"A key to the Eiffel Tower?" he kids. "Yes it is. Now you can visit any time you want. I bought the keychain the first day we went up there… I took a chance."

Donna can't hold back the tears now, they're running down her face.

"And before you say anything…This is a _new_ key… I had it cut from mine. And the keychain… you know… so you never forget."

"Harvey…"

"When you gave me back my house key, Donna… it just didn't feel right." he admits. "So…this is a new one, and what's mine is yours…except for my Miles Davis."

Donna chuckles, and wipes the tears from her cheek.

"Thank you, Harvey. I know that key was never mine to keep, but it felt like I was saying goodbye when I gave it back...because you were moving on," she admits, her voice quivering just the tiniest bit.

Harvey swallows hard as he recalls that night. It was just as difficult for him to take back the key. Donna placing it on his desk and walking away, felt like she was also saying goodbye. After she left, his stomach was in knots and he tossed and turned that entire night. When Paula kept asking what was wrong, he blamed a case he was working on. But it was just another lie he told her…and himself. He was in love with Donna then, he just couldn't admit it.

"It's over," he reminds her. Donna nods as she squeezes his hand. Then she gets up to find her purse.

"I have something for you, too," she says, returning.

Donna places a small navy blue velvet bag in Harvey's hand. He opens the gold drawstring and takes out a brown leather Hermès keychain with the signature gold H on the front. There's a key attached.

"I bought this thinking I'd save it for your birthday, but when we got home, I wanted you to have it… with _my_ key on it," she says, her eyes twinkling. "So you'll never forget our little shopping trip."

Harvey can't stop staring at this gift, his heartbeat picking up pace as he rolls it over in his palm. Donna might be struggling with telling the office, but this gesture confirms that she's certain about him.

Then Donna continues, a smile forming, "What's mine is yours… except for my "When Harry met Sally" DVD and my emergency container of Chunky Monkey."

The smile reaches Harvey's eyes, and before Donna can say another word, his mouth is on hers. After so many years of denials and missed opportunities, his heart is so full he can barely breathe. It's moments like these, when he allows himself to feel the love he has for Donna, that his emotions overwhelm him.

He takes a deep breath and whispers, "It's been a long day. What do you say we head to bed?"

Harvey leads Donna to the bedroom and upon entering, she notices the cactus on the bedside table, and it warms her heart.

"So that's where it is." Donna is surprised how relieved she is to see it. "I thought you got rid of it."

"No, it was lonely out there, so I brought it in here," he admits. "and the morning light is better."

"Lonely, huh?" She smirks.

xxx

Lying with her head on Harvey's chest, Donna contemplates how to tell Harvey about Friday's dinner plans. She knows he's not going to be thrilled, but Harvey and her father are going to have to spend time together at some point, so it might as well be sooner than later.

"So…." Donna says in the sweetest voice possible, her hand gently traveling across his chest. "My father's in town on Friday and he wants to meet us for dinner." It's not exactly the truth but it's not exactly a lie either.

" _Us_?" Harvey raises an eyebrow. He's a little suspicious. "How does he know about _us_?"

"He called today and I told him," she clarifies. "Look, I know you aren't his biggest fan, but it would mean a lot to me."

"Ok Donna," Harvey agrees. "He's not in love with me either, but I'll go. It's got to happen some time."

Donna lifts her head up to deliver a kiss on his cheek. "Thank you, Harvey"

"Dinner with your father and mudding with Louis..." he sighs. "This is turning out to be one hell of a weekend."

"You're just going to have to put on your big boy pants to meet my father and then take them off later to go mudding with Louis." Donna giggles.

"I take it back, you're a terrible philosopher," he pouts.

"I could take your pants off..." Her hands teasing the waistband of his boxers. "Although I'm not sure we should let the lonely cactus witness what's about to happen."

His eyes go wide and he quickly places the cactus pot on the floor.

"Now we're talkin!" he says as he pulls a giggling Donna on top of him.


	15. Chapter 15

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 15**

"Hello sweetheart, sorry I'm late."

Jim Paulsen leans over the round table to give Donna a quick kiss on the cheek. Harvey, sitting on the other side of her, immediately stands and reaches across with his hand.

"Good to see you, Jim."

"Harvey." Jim responds with a surprisingly firm handshake. This intentional grip coupled with Jim's frosty gaze, makes it clear that it's going to be a long night.

Friday has come all too soon for Harvey. Not only has he been dreading this evening, he's exhausted. It's been a week of keeping things casual at work with Donna, while making love to her at night... of managing merger negotiations, but being completely unable to concentrate on the most routine paperwork.

And now, this dinner with Jim is once again pulling Harvey out of his comfort zone. He promised Donna he would be on his best behaviour, and he's really going to try. But it's not going to be an easy road to gain Jim's trust.

If this were a legal situation, he'd have it in the bag, but there's really no winning when it comes to the father of your girlfriend. Tonight, all Harvey can do is show Jim a side of himself that he hasn't seen before.

Donna has also been stressed about this dinner. She's aware her father has concerns, and she also knows how easily Harvey can get his back up. It's practically a recipe for disaster. So she's made reservations at a new restaurant, an upscale steakhouse in the Meatpacking district. Both men love their steak, and perhaps this different place will provide an added distraction.

Tonight, she's strategically positioned between her father and Harvey. Hopefully, her presence next to both men will serve as a reminder of who they're here for. And if it comes to blows, creates enough distance that no one loses any teeth.

Harvey has already dipped into his second glass of wine by the time Jim arrives. He notices that Donna is pulling out all her favourite topics in a desperate attempt to keep the dinner conversation light.

He's seen her work the room at enough corporate events to know she's putting on her best effort here, including asking her father about his golf game and his plans for the upcoming July 4th weekend.

When the food arrives, it's a welcome distraction. The atmosphere now is not so much tense as it is formal. Donna tells her father about her responsibilities as Chief Operating Officer, and about the lawyers who have recently joined the firm.

Harvey decides to broach the topic of Jim's new venture. Being a corporate lawyer, he's in his element there and figures he can, at least, add something intelligent to the conversation.

"So what meetings have brought you to town?" Harvey asks, trying to appear engaged, as he cuts into the last of his steak.

"It's an exciting opportunity I'm working on... there are a few investors here who are quite interested," he says, his face lighting up at the prospect. "It's for the development of a chain of luxury seniors' facilities in upstate New York."

"Well, there's definitely the market for it. I plan on living _very_ well when I retire," Donna adds playfully. She's trying to be supportive while keeping the conversation casual.

"Have you crunched the numbers yet? What kind of risk are you looking at?" Harvey asks, going straight for the facts. "Some of these projects have red flags all over them."

"I haven't gotten all the numbers yet, but I'm certain I can move forward. It definitely has potential," Jim assures.

"Well, I'd recommend taking your time with it. These lifestyle builds often carry a lot of risk. Investors jump in wanting to make a quick buck and then, in the fine print, they find a way to pull out. It could leave you high and dry," he cautions.

The last thing Harvey wants is to find himself in a situation like the last time, when Donna nearly invested her retirement savings in a venture that blew up in her father's face.

"I'll take that under consideration, Harvey," he responds curtly. Tonight, Jim is not interested in getting business advice, he's on a different fact-finding mission.

"So… I have to say, I was a little surprised when Donna told me about you two," Jim says, looking at both of them from behind his round-rimmed glasses. "When did this come about?"

"Dad, it's quite new," Donna jumps in. "You're one of the first to know. We really haven't told anyone yet."

"What about at the office?" Jim asks.

"Not yet," Harvey offers, as he shifts in his seat. "Donna wants to give it some time, although we've worked closely for so long, I'm sure it won't come as a surprise to anyone."

"I understand wanting to take your time, sweetheart," Jim challenges, as he turns to Donna and places his hand on hers. "Life can change on a dime and it's always best to be in control of your own future."

That was a dig, and Harvey is starting to feel hot under the collar.

"Not to worry, Jim, Donna knows we're in this together. She's very much in control of her future," he confirms, as he reaches for his wine, his other hand resting on her lap.

"Harvey…" The hairs on Donna's arms stand on end in response to the tension building around her.

Jim pushes his glasses up with his finger and continues.

"Donna has also experienced enough disappointment to know that she should put herself first over any relationship, no matter how optimistic she might feel at the beginning."

"Dad!" Donna firmly places her hand on her father's forearm in the hopes of diffusing the conversation.

Still, Jim continues…

"I have to say, Harvey, I'm surprised you'd think you know more than her father about what she needs." Jim reaches for his wine. He's also feeling a little hot under the collar.

"Dad... Stop." Donna's eyes go wide.

Harvey huffs, his fingers now drumming on Donna's lap, the fingers of his other hand tightly pinching the stem of his wine glass.

"Well Jim, you might think that, but Donna and I have had a few conversations recently about what she needs, and I think I'm pretty well informed." Harvey can feel his heart pounding through his shirt now. He went too far.

"Harvey! That's enough!" Donna asserts, her teeth clenched because doesn't want to make a scene.

"First of all, I don't appreciate being talked about like I'm not even here… and I'm not some prize for this pissing contest between you two." Donna abruptly stands up, flattens the front of her dress with her hands and grabs her clutch purse off the table. "I'm going home. Dad, I'll leave the door unlocked. Harvey, I'll talk to you tomorrow."

Harvey stands up and reaches for her arm. "Donna, please don't go."

She gives him a burning look that tells him he better let go or she _will_ make a scene.

"At least let me call Ray to take you." His face pained, as he drops his hand.

"This might come as a surprise... but I can take care of myself," she says, her furious eyes glaring at both men. "As for what I need… I definitely don't need this from the two of you." And with that, Donna turns away, her hair swishing in time with her determined pace, the sound of her angry steps fading, as she storms out of the restaurant.

Both men sit in silence as the waiter removes their dinner plates. Harvey notices that Donna hardly touched her food. She's always been one to finish her plate, and his, sometimes. She was clearly stressed about tonight and him losing control certainly didn't help. Harvey decides he's not going to try and win any battles tonight, but he'd like to, at least, leave things on a more civilized note with Jim.

"Looks like we've been taken to task," Jim says, as he rubs his forehead and pours himself another glass of wine.

"She's upset… I should go talk to her." His voice is full of concern.

"Give her time to cool off a bit," Jim cautions.

Harvey slumps further in his chair and takes a sip of his wine, still uncertain whether he should stay or go after Donna.

"It's not personal, you know." Jim says, looking at Harvey from above his glasses.

"You're right… you thinking I'm not good enough for Donna… Why would I take that personally?" He sighs, sarcasm dripping from his words.

"Do you have children, Harvey?"

"No." He answers, refusing to look Jim in the eye, his fingers now fiddling with a cloth napkin on the table.

"If you're ever fortunate enough one day… and to have a daughter, then you'll understand," he starts.

"I watched my girl take her first breath, you know. She came out screaming her head off. Red curls, little feet and fists punching in all directions. She was feisty, even back then." Jim smirks.

Then, his features turn solemn.

"Suddenly, you're the parent of this precious child, and all you can think about is protecting her. Holding her hand when she crosses the street, strapping on her helmet when she bike rides, teaching her to fight back when the boys pull her pigtails," Jim explains. "And then, one day, you find yourself trying to shield her from heartbreak."

"I understand Jim, but Donna is not a child any more," Harvey counters, failing to understand that this is a conversation based on emotion, not fact. "Donna has been making her own decisions for a long time now."

"That's true, but that doesn't mean she's no longer my child," he explains. "I bet you think Donna is one of the strongest people you know."

Harvey nods.

"She is… but I've known her for her entire life," Jim explains. "And she's gotten badly hurt more than a few times, including during my divorce from her mother. She may hide it well, but the scars are there."

"She told me about that…" Harvey says, quickly glancing across the table. "About how difficult it was for her."

"I couldn't shield my two girls from the pain of our family breaking apart," Jim admits. "Which is probably why, even though Donna is very much her own person, I'm still so protective of her. I never want her to relive what she went through after the divorce."

"With all due respect, Jim," Harvey challenges. "The last time you and I talked, I was trying to protect her… from what _you_ wanted her to do. I also care about her, you know."

"Look, I'm not a perfect parent. I've made mistakes, and I appreciate what you did back then," Jim concedes. "But let me ask you…have you ever done something stupid that hurt someone you cared about, Harvey?"

Harvey takes a deep breath. He doesn't even know where to begin with that question.

"You can't tell me because I was stupid, that I don't love my daughter," Jim reasons. "I love Donna more than life, and if I think she might get hurt, I'm going to say something."

"Fair enough," Harvey is starting to understand. "But you need to know that what's happening between her and I… it's different. I would never do anything to hurt her."

"Not intentionally, maybe… She was sixteen the first time she had her heart broken. I took her for ice cream and to one of those musicals she likes so much. By the end of the evening, I could tell she'd be ok," Jim explains. "Donna's had her heart broken a few times since then, Harvey, and as a parent, it's been hard to watch it happen over and over again. It's no longer easily fixed with ice cream and theatre."

"Are you saying that you think I'll break her heart?" Harvey asks, his eyebrows raised. He can't believe he's a middle-aged man having this conversation right now.

"You have once, what's to say it won't happen again?" Jim states, matter-of-factly.

"Jim, I never have." Harvey suddenly sits up. He's confused and a little shocked at the suggestion. "You must be thinking of someone else."

"Remember a few years back when she left you to work elsewhere?" Jim asks. "You did then.. she came to me."

Harvey's heart is now thundering at the memory of the night she quit. He admitted that he loved her only to minimize his words the next day. Now, he feels like a first-class jerk, his past behaviour coming back to haunt him once again.

All this time, Donna has never let on just how much he'd hurt her. Leaning his elbows on the table, Harvey folds his hands together and hangs his head.

 _Shit._

"You don't know how much I regret what happened, and she had every right to leave," Harvey admits, as he takes a wary glance at the man next to him. Jim can see the pained expression on Harvey's face. "…and just so you know, Donna leaving broke me, too."

Jim nods, acknowledging that he understands Harvey's regret, but he's not done.

"Let me be frank with you. Harvey..." Jim's eyes now intensely zoning in. "I don't know how many relationships you've had, but I know you've had your fair share. For whatever reason, my girl seems to have a soft spot for you and there's nothing I can do about that… so… what are your intentions here?"

Harvey's throat is dry and he can feel a bead of sweat trickling all the way down his spine. He's not used to being called on the carpet about his personal life. Yet, he can't help but respect Jim for asking, especially when he, too, has felt protective of Donna on more than one occasion.

"My intentions?" Harvey's eyes go wide as he looks at Jim, his shirt collar suddenly feeling tight. "I love her... I've loved her for a long time."

"So… what do you plan to do with that? Do you want to marry her, have a family?" Jim asks, forcing Harvey into explaining himself.

Harvey presses his lips together and tenses his jaw. Twirling his wine glass between his fingers, he gathers his thoughts before speaking.

"I do… want that. But to be honest, it's also up to Donna," Harvey is looking directly at Jim now. "However she wants this… wants me."

"I'm surprised to hear that from you." Jim is not leaving without understanding exactly what Donna has gotten herself into. "So you've had feelings for her, yet all these years, you've never taken a chance? Given your reputation in the field, I would have figured you'd go right after something if you wanted it."

"Jim…" Harvey says in his defence. He takes a breath, trying not to get his back up again. "It wasn't that simple and it was never completely up to me. I was her boss and Donna had rules around that, which was probably for the best because I also had some things to work out."

Jim might not have the sharpest business sense at times, but Harvey has to give him credit, he's not a man who's easily intimidated.

"So… you think you're ready now? Donna was happy in her last relationship, but for some reason, she can never seem to say no to you." Jim sighs.

Harvey closes his eyes and takes another deep breath.

 _Thomas Fucking Kessler._

"What did she tell you about Thomas?" Harvey is curious.

"That it didn't work out," Jim responds. "He was supposed to take her to Paris. And the next thing I know she tells me you two are together." Harvey can tell from the look on Jim's face that he's disappointed Thomas is no longer in the picture.

"Did you ever meet him?" Harvey can't help but wonder how serious Donna and Thomas had actually gotten.

"No, we were going to have dinner before their trip, but he had a last-minute business meeting and cancelled," Jim says.

Harvey rolls his eyes and nods. He knows all about Thomas's last-minute 'business meetings'… probably because he was with his wife and kid in Connecticut.

Contemplating what he should say, Harvey pauses. Then, he decides on the truth.

"Jim, I need to tell you something, but it needs to stay between us."

"Ok."

Harvey proceeds to tell Jim of his suspicions about Thomas Kessler, and then the discovery of his double life. He explains how he confronted Thomas, dropped him from the firm and flew to Paris to break the news to Donna.

"You did that?" Jim asks, his eyebrows raised in surprise.

"I did… and I'd do it again," Harvey states, his voice confident but not proud. "He didn't deserve her, Jim, none of them have ever deserved her."

"And why do you say that?" Jim asks, sensing there just might be more to Harvey than he thought.

"Because she's… perfect, she's everything." Harvey's voice cracks a little and it offers Jim a glimpse into the depth of his feelings. "These guys, they never knew her like I know her. Donna is the most amazing person I've ever met. I'm a better man because of her and I don't even want to _think_ about my life without her in it. She's…"

"…precious to you, right?" Jim completes his sentence.

Harvey turns his eyes to Jim, his features sincere as he swallows, then nods.

"Yes."

"Well, Harvey… maybe we do have something in common…"

"That… and the fact that she's mad at both of us right now," Harvey adds, trying to cut some of the tension between them with a little levity. "I'll apologize to her first thing tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" Jim has a puzzled look on his face.

"Donna said she would talk to me tomorrow," Harvey reminds him.

"Looks like you still have some things to learn about my girl," Jim says, as he puts his hand on Harvey's shoulder. "You've got to fix that tonight."

Harvey offers the tiniest smile, relieved that this conversation is nearly over. He may not have passed with flying colours, but Jim Paulsen might dislike him just a little bit less, so he considers it a win.

For everything Jim has heard about Harvey, he's surprised that this man, this high-powered lawyer with his fancy tailored suits and chauffeur, is not the arrogant ladies' man he thought him to be.

Harvey also finds himself with a new-found respect for Donna's father. Jim was tough, but he wasn't mean, and he did _exactly_ what Harvey would have done if he were in that position.

As the waiter arrives and places the bill on the table, Jim reaches for it.

"No Jim, let me take care of this." Harvey offers, wanting to leave on a positive note. "You can get the next one."

Jim nods in agreement, understanding what Harvey is actually saying.

Then, Harvey proposes, "Why don't I take you to Donna's and I'll talk to her before I head home for the night."

"How about you drop me off at the diner next to her place. I've got a bunch of emails to catch up on, and that will give you enough time to grovel." Jim offers a knowing grin, as they get ready to leave.

"Thanks Jim, I'd appreciate that." Harvey reciprocates with a small smile of his own. As they walk out, he turns to Jim.

"Why don't you email me the plans for that business opportunity," Harvey offers. "Let me take a look, just to make sure it's sound."

"Thanks Harvey, I'd appreciate that."

xxx

Donna is already in her nightgown and reading in bed when she hears the front door open. She wonders if her father and Harvey actually stuck it out at the restaurant, or if Jim was just giving her time to cool off.

She expects the soft knock on her bedroom door, but it's the voice that surprises her.

"Donna… can I come in?"

 _Harvey._

"Only if you have ice cream," she says flatly.

Harvey opens the door a just a crack. He sticks his hand through the opening to reveal a container of Chunky Monkey ice cream.

"You think I would show up here without reinforcements?" he teases from behind the door.

"Come in then." She's still upset with him, but when Harvey does things like this, it's difficult to stay angry for long.

He slowly opens the door, places the ice cream and spoon on the bedside table, and sits on the edge of the bed next to her.

"I'm sorry," he says, his hand reaching for hers. "I lost my cool… when your father suggested I didn't deserve you."

"Harvey, he's my father, what did you expect?" she asks, tilting her head.

"I couldn't help myself," he sighs. "Anyway, we talked. I think he hates me a little less now."

"I'm pretty sure he doesn't hate you, Harvey." Donna rolls her eyes, and then smirks. "All the bad guys you've taken on, I would have never guessed it was going to be my father who would take you down."

Harvey's offers a brief smile, but it doesn't reach his eyes.

"He told me something…" he starts. "…that I broke your heart before. Is that true?"

Leaning against the headboard, Donna draws her head back in surprise. She looks away, as she folds her book over her lap.

"How did that come up?" she asks, not keen to give him an answer.

"Is it true?"

"It's in the past, Harvey." She doesn't want to open old wounds.

"Is it true?" A third time.

Donna takes a deep breath.

"You told me you loved me and then took it back… and…yes…I was heartbroken."

Harvey's presses his lips together, his eyes sorrowful, his features full of regret.

"I'm sorry… I knew you were angry back then, but I didn't know that's what you felt."

"Well, I didn't exactly tell you, did I?" she admits, her eyes glassy. "Not that it would have mattered back then... but thank you, this helps to put the past in the past."

"I'm really sorry, Donna, I was an idiot…" Harvey shakes his head, his eyes damp. He massages Donna's leg through the duvet cover. "Remember my panic attacks? Just so you know… that was heartbreak, too… and I don't plan on ever feeling that way again."

Donna presses her lips together and nods.

"Me neither," she agrees, a small smile starts to form on her lips. "Do you want to stay tonight?"

"Spend the night with Jim next door? I'm not going to push my luck!" he chuckles. "Besides, I have some documents I want to look over tonight."

Before leaving, Harvey leans over, his hands cradling Donna's face. Gently placing his mouth on hers, he delivers a deep and affectionate kiss.

Then he pulls back with a smile. "Enjoy your ice cream."

"Wish you could enjoy it with me," she says.

"Tomorrow," he assures.

"Good night, Harvey."

"I love you, Donna."

"I love you, too," she responds, her eyes twinkling.

As Harvey walks out, he stops just outside Donna's apartment door to reflect on the evening. It's been a difficult night, but a good one. Harvey was forced to confront some of the hurt he's caused, and also acknowledge the hurt that he's felt. Like Donna told him, they can leave the past in the past.

Although Harvey dreaded having dinner with Donna's father, he would have never faced these hard truths if Jim hadn't been there.

Through it all, he and Donna are still ok, better than ok, actually.

And for Harvey, that's all that matters.


	16. Chapter 16

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 16**

"Why don't you just pretend that you're lying in a big delicious bowl of whipped cream?" Donna suggests while trying to contain her laughter.

"You're no help," Harvey retorts, as he gears himself up to go mudding with Louis. "Now you've ruined every whipped cream fantasy I've ever had!"

"I'm sure we can fix that," she says, still giggling, her hand on his chest as they lie face-to-face in Donna's bed.

This is the first full weekend Donna and Harvey have spent together as a couple, and Harvey is not too happy about the fact that, today, he's likely to see more of Louis' naked body than Donna's.

But Harvey gave Louis his word that he would follow through, and although he'd never admit it, he's curious about this mudding thing. Mike and Rachel have gone, even Donna went, so Harvey figures if they've survived, he will too.

"What are your plans for today while Louis is torturing me?" Harvey asks, as they enjoy the last few minutes of their lazy Sunday morning together.

Donna rolls her eyes. Harvey can be such a baby sometimes. Although, she has to admit, she finds it cute when he pouts.

"I've got a telephone call planned with Rachel… then I need to get organized here and get my life back in order. You've been taking up all my time," she adds with a smile.

"So are you going to tell Rachel how you can't live without me?" he asks, his nose tickling her ear as he draws her closer. Donna can feel his smile on her cheek.

"Your name might come up," she teases. "I may have a few things to say."

With the exception of Friday night, when Donna's father visited, the pair has spent every night tangled in bed together since returning from Paris. It's only been a week, but for Harvey, waking up without Donna next to him is no longer an option. His place or hers, he doesn't care, and eventually, the next logical step will be for them to move in together.

Maybe it was the conversation with Jim Paulsen, or the healing that came with talking to Donna afterwards, but in his heart and mind, Harvey feels completely settled now.

Every now and then, though, he thinks about how long it's taken him to get here, and he winces. All that wasted time. If he had been brave enough over the years, this morning would be just another of many lazy Sunday mornings together. Maybe they'd even be married by now, and have a kid or two.

Whenever Harvey thinks about this kind of future, he feels hopeful and excited. The fear is gone. He's also looking forward to having Donna meet his mother, Marcus and the kids one day soon.

"If I survive mudding…," he whines, as he nestles closer to her under the duvet. "I'm going to head to the office for a bit and then I'll pick up some take-out for tonight."

"Ok great," she says. "Now put on a brave face and go have fun with the managing partner."

"I thought I was _already_ having fun with the managing partner…" he kids, earning him a laugh from Donna.

xxx

Wrapped in a white silk bathrobe with her hair in a ponytail, Donna sits alone on the sofa and sips her coffee. She begins going through her stack of unopened envelopes when the phone rings.

"Rachel! Finally! How are you?" Donna answers as she places the unread mail on the coffee table.

"Everything is great, but forget about me… how are you?" Her friend enquires. "I wish I was with you now, drinking tea… like old times. Not to mention I'd love to be there to see all this happen in person!"

Donna knows exactly what Rachel is referring to, the excitement in her voice is coming through loud and clear over the phone line.

"Well, you wouldn't be seeing much," she says, tempering Rachel's excitement. Only my father, you and Mike know. I told Harvey that I needed a few days at the office without anyone knowing… because it will definitely change things at work for me."

"And what did he say?" Rachel asks.

"He wasn't too happy about it," she says. "I'm not sure he understands that it may not impact his career but it will likely affect how I'm seen at the office."

"Oh Donna, I know you are sensitive about that, and it might be different at first, but I really don't think that will be the case," Rachel assures. "Harvey hasn't been your boss for a long time, and you've more than proven yourself as COO. This is an opportunity for you to stand up for yourself. If men at the office can have relationships and not have it affect their careers, then show them that women can too."

"Thanks Rach, it means a lot to hear that. It's something that concerns me though." Donna sighs. "Maybe it's just my issue. I did have a few days to get my head around things at work so I feel better about it now."

"If anyone can handle it, Donna, it's you… Funny how things have changed though," Rachel observes. "You always thought Harvey was the one who was afraid to risk everything, and now it's you who's been hesitating."

"Wow, you're right," Donna responds, placing her hand across her forehead with this realization. "Harvey told me he doesn't care what people think and that we should just tell them."

"Well, that tells me he's a man who knows what he wants," she replies, her tone optimistic. "And after all these years, that's pretty great actually. Give him the benefit of the doubt... So enough about that… I want details! Tell me everything!" Rachel giggles.

During their hour-long conversation, Donna proceeds to tell Rachel about Harvey unexpectedly showing up in Paris, their intense fight and her devastation when she learned about Thomas. She recounts how Harvey cared for her afterwards, encouraging her to spend the weekend with him.

Donna gives Rachel a minute-by-minute, play-by-play account of their two wonderful days in Paris – shopping at Hermès, picnicking in the shadow of the Eiffel Tower, walking along the river, visits to the Louvre and the bookstore. Then she tells Rachel about their last night and how Harvey surprised her with a special evening at the Eiffel Tower.

"Are you serious? Harvey kissed you on the balcony of the Eiffel Tower?" Rachel can't believe this. "You and Harvey?! Are you sure this isn't a movie!"

"I know, but it was more than that, Rach…," she confides. "We talked a lot and cleared up some things that needed to be dealt with. It wasn't easy but it needed to happen. After that he told me he loved me and wants this, wants us." Just the thought of that evening sets Donna's heart racing.

"I can't tell you what that did to me, Rach...what it still does to me when I think about it. I might still be in shock I think," she admits.

"So…" Rachel continues. "What happened after? Did you go back to the hotel to make it… _official_?" she asks cheekily.

"Actually, we didn't, if you can believe that. Lord knows I wanted to, but Harvey thought we should take things slow," Donna says. "He wanted be sure I was in the right frame of mind after Thomas."

"Harvey?!" Rachel is incredulous and Donna can picture her mouth dropping at the other end of the phone. "Our Harvey? I would have never expected that from him. I don't think I'll ever be able to look at him the same way, Donna… he's definitely in love."

"I am too, Rachel," Donna confirms. "At first, I was afraid he'd change his mind, because, well… he's Harvey. But let's just say it's definitely _official_ now." Rachel can tell by Donna's voice that she has a wide grin on her face.

"And your dad knows? How did that go?" Rachel asks.

"As expected. It was tense at first and I actually left them to talk. My father was tough on Harvey, wanted to know how serious he is about me," Donna states. "Dad said very little to me afterwards except that he respects Harvey, so I'm taking that as a good sign."

"So… it seems to me this is it for you two," Rachel cautiously suggests.

"It is for me, and Harvey's told me as much," Donna confides. "But you know, that doesn't make me any less nervous about the entire thing. There's a part of me that's still terrified it will all end."

"I understand, but that's love isn't it?" Rachel empathizes. "After Mike told me he had never gone to Harvard, I started to second-guess everything, too. But you've known Harvey for a very long time and he wouldn't have taken the risk if he wasn't one hundred per cent certain."

"You're right," Donna agrees. "I think I just need to trust that everything is going to be ok. Harvey seems a lot more confident than I am these days."

"It will work out, I'm sure of it. Harvey and you are together now, Donna. Don't be afraid to stake your claim though and don't wait too long if you want more with him." Rachel advises.

Then she adds, "So…when are you coming to visit me, we should make plans…."

xxx

"Louis… warn me next time you plan to drop your towel…." Harvey sighs after realizing he can now never "unsee" Louis' bare bum.

"Harvey, relax, you've played sports, you've been in locker rooms," Louis says defending his nakedness. "Now quit complaining and slide your body into that glorious tub of volcanic love!"

Harvey rolls his eyes, drops his towel and, with arms balancing on either side of the tub, quickly slides into the bath to avoid offering Louis a show of his own. The mud is warm and sticky, and Harvey feels like he's been dropped into a vat of baked chocolate pudding. As he sinks deeper into the mix, he squirms at the sensation of the mud making its way into places it doesn't belong.

"So how long do we have to do this for?" he asks, visibly uncomfortable. If Harvey could set a stopwatch right now, he would.

"Well, if you start with that question, you're never going to relax enough to get the benefits," Louis instructs.

"Ok then, Louis… what's the point of this?" Harvey asks, clearly impatient.

"You're a terrible student, you know that?" Louis scolds. "Mud is good for your skin. It's cleansing, keeps you looking young and if you're living with a pregnant, hormonal fiancée, it also keeps you sane..."

Harvey stares at the ceiling before closing his eyes. Resting his head on the tiny towel pillow attached behind, he tries to distract himself with thoughts of Donna wrapped in a bedsheet.

"So… Harvey," Louis begins. "Not sure if you saw the latest client list, but we lost Thomas Kessler and Associates last week. Alex had recently taken him on after David Stephens left the firm... Needless to say, Alex is not happy…any idea what that was about?"

"I do…I'll talk to Alex tomorrow and give him one of mine," he offers.

"You're not going to tell me more than that?" Louis opens his eyes and turns his face towards Harvey. "C'mon, Harvey, as managing partner, I need to know what happened."

Harvey sighs, knowing there is no escaping this conversation.

"Only if you swear to secrecy…. I mean it Louis… Donna will kill me if she knew I said anything." Harvey explains.

Louis raises his eyebrows in surprise. He didn't expect Harvey to be so upfront so quickly. Usually there's denial, insults, maybe even a few terse words between the two of them before they talk about anything meaningful.

"Jesus, Harvey, not a word, I promise…" Louis assures.

Harvey pauses and he takes a deep breath. With his head still resting and eyes closed, he sets out to explain.

"Donna didn't know this, but… Thomas is married, has a kid and another one on the way," Harvey says. "I confronted him and fired him from the firm."

There's a second of silence.

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Louis quickly sits up in the bath, mud dripping from the swirling black hairs on his chest. "I thought he was divorced. We helped with that… Poor Donna."

"That's what he told everyone, including Donna," Harvey says, quickly glancing at Louis. "So, after I learned about his second wife….I went to Paris to tell Donna. I didn't want her to be alone when she found out…. that's why I left so quickly."

Louis pauses, contemplating what Harvey just confided.

"I'm confused..." Louis is trying to understand. "Donna seems happier than ever. We talked on Tuesday and she was practically glowing… told me the trip was not what she expected but that she's _really_ happy."

Harvey closes his eyes once again and a tiny smile appears on his face.

"Is that what she said?" he asks. His pulse still races when he thinks about the last ten days of his life.

"Harvey, I know something's going on, why don't you just tell me." Louis states matter-of-factly. "You think I haven't noticed that you've been a lot _nicer_ this week? You didn't even bail on mudding... which I fully expected you to do."

Harvey lets out another sigh. He has to admit, the bath is having a relaxing effect on him. The mud is actually making him drowsy.

"Alright Louis… I shouldn't be saying anything… you have to promise again…I really mean it," Harvey warns.

"I promise," Louis agrees, as he settles back down into the mud.

"A lot happened in Paris and Donna…well…Donna and I….we're…" Harvey doesn't get the chance to finish.

"Are you kidding me?!" Louis yells, splashing mud everywhere as he suddenly sits up again. "I knew it! That's fantastic!"

Harvey doesn't turn his head but gives Louis another sideways glance.

"You can't tell Donna that I told you, Louis," Harvey warns. "She's afraid of what the office will think, so she wants to be the one to tell people in her own time."

"Not a word from me…" Louis settles back into the tub and lies quietly for a minute.

"Harvey, how are you with all this?" he asks, his voice giving away his concern. "I know it's always been complicated between you two. What changed?"

"Honestly? Thomas… the entire situation forced me to think about what my life would be like without Donna, and I couldn't… have that," Harvey admits. "I had to take a risk if I ever hoped to make this happen with her... with us."

Louis turns to Harvey, his face full of understanding. "Well I'm proud of you Harvey. I know that wasn't easy for you. Just like it wasn't easy with Sheila. But trust me, it's worth it. You and Donna…you belong together. I've always believed that."

"Thanks Louis," Harvey says, his voice softening.

"When things finally worked out with Sheila, I felt like I was home. Does it feel like you're home, like you're where you should be?" Louis wonders. Harvey can hear the sincerity in his voice.

"It does."

"Can I offer you a piece of advice then?" Louis asks, as he looks over at Harvey.

"What is it?" Harvey slowly opens his eyes to peer over at his colleague.

"You've waited thirteen years for this, don't wait too long for the rest," Louis advises. "If this makes you happy, don't wait. Donna is one of the best people I know, and it's always been clear to me how much she loves you."

"Thanks Louis, I'll think about that." Harvey nods. He's so relaxed now that he can barely feel his legs. After a few moments in thought, he turns to Louis. "So…how are you and Sheila doing? You ready for fatherhood?"

"I'm definitely ready," Louis admits. "And ready for Sheila to have this baby… Pregnant women and their hormones, Harvey… it's insane. No matter what I try to do to help, it doesn't make her happy. I am actually scared of that woman sometimes!"

Harvey chuckles. "You're going to make a great husband and father, Louis, I'm sure of it."

"Thanks Harvey. You know, it was about this time last year that I was terrified of ending up alone," Louis admits. "And now, to be with the woman I love and to have her love me back….I can't tell you how that makes me feel."

"I think I have an idea," Harvey suggests.

The two men soak quietly in their baths for several more minutes and then Louis informs Harvey that their time is up.

"Already?" asks Harvey. "It wasn't as bad as I thought."

"So now you love mudding too?!" Louis says with a giddiness as he suddenly lifts his naked body out of the tub, forcing Harvey to abruptly turn his head.

"Love it? I wouldn't go that far, Louis." Harvey cautions.

"I guess this is just one more thing we have in common now!" He adds with excitement.

Harvey shakes his head as he gets up and quickly grabs his towel.

"Yes, Louis, we're practically twins…," Harvey replies. The sarcasm from his words dripping almost as intensely as the mud falling from his body.

xxx

It's early evening when Harvey arrives at Donna's apartment. He unlocks her door to find the lights dimmed, a glimmer of the setting sunset peaking through the curtains and Aretha Franklin playing on the stereo. The room is empty and Donna is no where to be found.

"Donna?… You here?" he asks, as his eyes scan the room.

"Come join me." she answers, her voice muffled from behind the bathroom door.

Harvey places the take-out he brought on the kitchen counter and proceeds to slowly open the bathroom door. The room is aglow with a dozen lit candles. Donna, her hair in a messy bun, is soaking in a giant tub of bubbles and holding a glass of wine in her hand.

Harvey's eyes go wide with excitement, his tongue running across his teeth as he leans over to kiss Donna.

"Seriously?!" he asks. "If this is my reward for going mudding. I might make it a regular thing!"

"All that mud… I can't have you ruining my sheets now can I," she playfully suggests. "You better get in."

Harvey immediately begins unbuckling his belt. Within seconds, his clothes are off and he slips in the tub, the hot water instantly drawing him in and causing a shiver up his spine. Donna reaches for the second glass of wine sitting on the floor next to the tub, and hands it to Harvey.

"I was expecting you," she smiles. "But it's not a giant tub of whipped cream... you'll just have to use your imagination."

"Is this in celebration of our anniversary?" Harvey asks as he takes the glass, and sinks even deeper into the water.

"Anniversary? I thought everyday was a celebration with me," she jokes, as she lazily swirls the bubbles with her hand.

"It is… but it's also been exactly one week since you couldn't keep your hands off me," Harvey says, delivering that signature grin that melts Donna every time. "That's worth celebrating."

"Funny, I don't remember it that way. It's been exactly one week since I _let_ you kiss me," she recalls.

"It's actually been one week since I've seen you in the lingerie you wore to dinner," he quips.

"That wasn't lingerie, that was haute couture," she informs, confidently taking another sip of her wine.

"Then haute couture must be French for lingerie… " he volleys back. "Don't get me wrong, I'm all for it, and it's one of the benefits of learning another language."

Donna giggles and stretches her leg across the giant tub, her calf now caressing Harvey's thigh. On instinct, he reaches down and puts his hand on her shin to massage her leg.

"So be honest… how was mudding with Louis?" she asks. "I bet it was no where near as bad as you thought it would be, was it?"

"Well, the mud ends up in places it really shouldn't go… which took some getting used to…, " he chuckles. "But hanging out with Louis wasn't so bad."

"You and Louis… it looks like my boys are growing up." She teases before changing the subject.

"I talked to Rachel today and she asked when I'd… we… might like to come visit. Maybe we could make time to go for a weekend this summer?" Donna tilts her head as she tickles his thigh with her foot.

Harvey smiles back, quickly pulls himself out of the tub and wraps a towel around his waist.

"I'll be right back," he says.

When Harvey returns he has an envelope in his hands. "Since you're all wet, I'll show you." He proceeds to pull out two first-class tickets to Seattle for the upcoming July 4th weekend.

"I know I should have asked first but I wanted to surprise you. I had Gretchen make sure there was nothing pressing in your calendar. Rachel also knows," he admits.

"She does?! Harvey… are you serious? We're going to see Mike and Rachel in a couple of weeks?!" Donna can hardly contain her excitement. A wide grin on her face as she starts splashing the water around her. She reaches for Harvey's arm and pulls him down for another kiss.

Harvey chuckles at her playfulness as he sets the tickets aside, drops his towel and slides back in.

"Well, it seems to me we're pretty good at this weekend travel thing," he quips. "Let's see if we can make it two for two."


	17. Chapter 17

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 17**

"You're in early!" Samantha remarks as she passes by Donna's office. Stopping cold in the doorway, she folds her arms across her grey suit jacket, and passes the threshold.

It's 7:30 am on Monday - definitely a little earlier than Donna is used to arriving. When she worked for Harvey, she always made a point of getting in before he did, but he was never much of a morning person. With her increased responsibilities as COO, Donna's workdays are definitely more demanding and, now that she and Harvey are together, she's determined to take every opportunity to prove she's still every bit the professional.

"How was your weekend?" Samantha asks as she saunters towards the desk.

"Good! I caught up with with Rachel in Seattle," Donna says, steering clear of any mention of Thomas or her personal life. "Robert must be proud. She and Mike are doing amazing things with the legal clinic there. It was great to catch up with her. How was yours?"

"Pretty low key, although I met a few law school friends for brunch, which was nice," she responds, her eyes scanning the room. Donna senses there's something on Samantha's mind.

"Everything ok?" Donna enquires.

"Actually…," Samantha hints, as she slides into the chair across from Donna. "I need to pick your brain about something and… it's personal. Do you have a second?"

Donna is taken aback but also curious. Leaning her elbows on her desktop, she clasps her hands suggesting to Samantha that she has her full attention. "Sure, what can I do for you?"

"Harvey…" she begins. "Do you know if he's seeing anyone?"

Donna's heart drops and races all at once. Her eyes involuntarily go wide, but she's quick to catch herself to prevent what she's feeling on the inside, from showing on the outside. Tilting her head, a tight smile on her lips, Donna does her theatrical best to look indifferent. "Why do you ask?"

"One of my best friends from law school is getting married in Boston the weekend after July 4th, and I thought I might ask Harvey to come to the wedding with me," she says. "I figure he'd be good company… all my friends are lawyers, not to mention it wouldn't hurt to have a handsome man on my arm… and he has family in Boston, doesn't he?"

"Yes he does. I'm surprised you're coming to me first and not asking Harvey himself?" Donna enquires, sliding her hands down onto her lap to direct her nervous energy through fidgeting fingers. Even though she knows Harvey only has eyes for her, Donna can't help but feel protective over their relationship.

"Well, you know him pretty well," Samantha states, her red, bee-stung lips offering a friendly but uncomfortable smile. "And I thought I'd avoid any awkwardness by asking you first… you know… in case he's already involved with someone."

"So you'd have no issues dating a colleague then?" Donna asks, intrigued by what Samantha might have to say on the matter.

"Well, I haven't really given it that much thought… it would depend on the situation… you know… if I were a subordinate, I might feel differently," she offers. "But we're all adults here and if there's no conflict, I don't see why not. You're fortunate with Thomas, Donna. I gotta say, the good men are getting harder to find."

Donna takes a deep breath. She has no choice but to tell Samantha the truth… and as for avoiding any awkwardness, that ship has sailed. Plus, she's going to have to explain the Thomas situation, which she's dreading. Only Rachel knows about that mess.

Just as Donna opens her mouth to come clean, Louis pops his head in.

"Hello ladies, how are you both today?" Louis asks with cheery enthusiasm. Since taking over as managing partner, he's been keen to keep morale high and show himself to be a strong and approachable leader. So, every morning, at Sheila's suggestion, he makes the rounds to greet staff on the 50th floor. In the afternoons, he pops downstairs to do the same, including with the terrified associates.

"Great Louis, we're just catching up on a little girl talk," Donna signals. "How's Sheila feeling these days?"

"She's definitely ready to have this baby. Three more weeks to go!" he states with a proud, toothy grin. "Sorry to interrupt, but Samantha, do you have a second? There's something I need to run by you with the Miller case."

Samantha stands and walks towards the door.

"Sure Louis." Turning back to Donna, she adds, "We can catch up later."

"Sounds good. I'll come look for you," Donna says with a frozen smile, her eyes following Samantha and Louis into his corner space.

After they're out of sight, Donna desperately wants to march right into Harvey's office, but he hasn't made it in yet. She busies herself at her desk until the clock hits 8:00 am. Exactly one minute later, she gets up and quickly marches to the other side of the building.

As Donna rounds the corridor to his office, she slows her pace. Seeing him at his desk, head down and typing away, she can't help but smile. Then, she glances at her old cubicle, and for a split second, she misses being there, next to him. Her memories of those days are so vivid and yet it feels like a lifetime ago. She was different then. They were different. And now it's all so clear. It was confusing when they were in it, but looking back, the loyalty, devotion and even the love was real and right there all along.

Sensing she's near, Harvey looks up. She catches his attention as she casually sways into his space.

"Donna." Harvey's hands are still typing but he's not looking at the screen. There's a hint of a smile on his lips. He's said her name a million times before, but now, she can hear a lightness, an optimism, in his voice.

Donna tilts her head, her lips forcing a smile as she's unable to hide her affection for him. "Harvey."

"What are you doing on this side of the office?" he asks, dark brown eyes following her as she sits in front of him. "If you have any naughty ideas, Donna, they're going to have to wait," he deadpans. "I like to keep my personal life and my professional life separate."

Donna rolls her eyes at him. "Harvey, you're not taking what I said seriously," she huffs. "That's fine, because the personal and the professional are coming to smack you in the side of the head, and you can't blame me for it."

Harvey furrows his brow and pulls his chin back, not sure if she's teasing or serious.

"What are you talking about?" Harvey asks, his eyes quickly looking her over.

Today, she's wearing one of his favourite outfits. A sleeveless dress in black crepe, with an open neck and decorative lace that teases her cleavage. Simple in its design, it hugs every curve perfectly. Donna can pretty much wear anything and look good, but Harvey has always appreciated her classic style – tailored, well-cut clothing that shows off her perfect figure.

What she has on today is not evening wear, but the black and the lace and her porcelain skin take him right back to being under the stars at the Eiffel Tower. He's seen her in many stunning outfits, but that Paris dress… she has never been more beautiful than that night. It reminds Harvey to suggest an evening out, just for the sole purpose of seeing her in it again.

"Focus, please!" She's talking and he's not even listening. Her long legs are crossed to the side and her fingers intertwined her on lap. Donna goes silent, waiting for his eyes to make their way up to hers again.

"Samantha asked me if you're seeing anyone," she bluntly states.

"Samantha?" he asks, his eyebrows shifting in surprise. "I figured she'd be more into you than me… I guess I called that one wrong. So…what did you tell her?"

"I didn't get a chance to tell her anything," she explains. "Louis walked in and interrupted."

"What's the problem, then?" He's knows why Donna's flustered, but he's going to enjoy this. "Because if you're thinking about a threesome… you once told me, I wouldn't want to share you…"

"Harvey!" Donna interrupts, shaking her head in response to the smirk on his face.

"She wants you to go to a wedding with her in Boston the weekend after July 4th. It's a bunch of her lawyer friends and she knows you have family there."

"So, tell her the truth. Donna. I thought we've been through this." Harvey is unnervingly calm as his eyes make their way back to the document on his computer screen. He already knows Louis is fine with it. "Everyone is going to find out eventually and I bet they'll think it's long overdue."

"Harvey, I'm going to say this only once… and it frustrates me that you don't seem to get it," she sighs. "The difference here is that, yes, I've earned my position, but I don't have the traditional academic and professional background that many other COOs have," she says, her voice strained. "And I've spent years dealing with rumours about you and me. My integrity will always be called into question. It's different for you."

Harvey drops his hands on either side of his laptop and looks at Donna with empathetic eyes.

"Donna, you're talking to the guy who hired a fraud and _that_ worked out just fine. _This_ will be ok, too," he says confidently, opening his palms towards her. "You've proven that you're more than qualified for the job. And I'll gladly take on anyone who suggests otherwise."

Harvey takes a breath and delivers a half-smile. "I don't think this is about your qualifications, to be honest. It's about change… I know I'm the last person who should be telling you that, because I have never done well with change, but….I think that's what it is, Donna… a big, scary change for both of us."

Donna slowly nods and exhales. "Listen to you, Mr. Philosopher…"

"You're rubbing off on me," he grins.

"I guess there's no escaping this, then. I have to talk to Samantha." Biting her lip, she pauses before continuing. "As for the wedding, I have an idea…"

Harvey's eyes go wide. He leans back in his chair and cocks his head. He knows Donna well enough to know she wouldn't leave Samantha high and dry. Now he's both curious and a little wary about what crazy idea she's going to try and sell to him.

"Ok spill it," he says. "I know you're thinking something. But, for the record, I don't care how platonic it would be, I am _not_ going to a wedding with Samantha, so don't even go there."

"Well…" The corners of Donna's mouth curl into a mischievous smile. "What about Marcus? He's single now and he's already in Boston. Plus, it might be good for him to get out. You never know, they may hit it off."

The suggestion jolts Harvey to sit up in his chair, and he's shaking his head with conviction. "Donna…there is NO way…. Absolutely not! I'm not running a God damn matchmaking service out of this office! Not to mention, he's not even officially divorced… and you want him to go on a date to a _wedding_?!"

"I get it Harvey, but it doesn't have to be a romantic date, and Marcus has been separated for a year now. This is not about you, it's about him. Let him decide," she says, trying to temper his reaction. "Can't it just be a fun night out? I also think it would be healthy for Samantha to not hang out with just lawyers…Lord knows, they're all so intense..."

Harvey huffs at her little dig. "Fine. But I'm taking _no_ responsibility for this. I'm telling him it's entirely your idea. I know better than to get involved in people's personal lives… that's why I'm not a divorce lawyer." he states with certainty.

"Harvey, it's not 'people'," she reminds him, a sweet smile on her lips. "It's your brother, and he's a big boy… you're just being thoughtful."

"Fine, I'll ask, but no guarantees..." He takes a deep breath, quietly impressed that despite why Samantha came to her, Donna is kind enough to still want to help, and to consider Marcus's happiness as well. It's one of the reasons Harvey loves her so much. She's always ready to give when someone needs it, even when they don't realize it.

"But then you need to come clean with Samantha, ok? It's unfair to keep her hopes up about yours truly," he smirks. "She and all the single ladies of New York need to know that I'm spoken for."

" _Oh My God, Harvey!_ " she quips. "Dr. Lipschitz can strike 'self-esteem issues' off his list now. Time to move on to 'delusions of grandeur'!"

Harvey can't help but grin at Donna. Their banter is as charged as ever. But now, knowing how much love there is behind her words, it all feels like foreplay, and the sudden tightness in his pants tells him as much. If Donna teased him like this at home right now, he'd be naked in ten seconds flat.

As Donna gets up to leave, she can feel his eyes following her out, and can't help but smile. Turning at the doorway, her hand on his glass wall, she looks back at him. Harvey's face is relaxed, his features soft and, despite all his whining about Marcus, he's clearly content.

The last time Donna remembers seeing him like this at work, was after he patched things up with his mother. She and Harvey were in his office late one evening, and he asked her to help hang the artwork his mother had given him. As he stared at the portrait, he looked as if an enormous weight had been lifted off his shoulders. It's the same look she sees now.

"I enjoyed this little visit, Harvey," she flirts, with an eyebrow raised. "As for being spoken for… whoever this _young_ , _gorgeous_ and _impeccably dressed_ woman in your life is, I hope she realizes how lucky she is."

Harvey knows where this is going and he can't help but chuckle. "No, no… _I'm_ the lucky one," he exaggerates. Raising his chin as he speaks, he adds. "But thanks, I'll be sure to tell her tonight."

"And _that_ … was the right answer!" she says, pointing to him as she steps away, and leaving him rolling his eyes.

xxx

It's late afternoon, and Donna grabs her phone as it vibrates on her desk. A text from Harvey.

 _Marcus is open to the idea._

 _The stuff I do for you…_

 _Eyes emoji!_

Donna smiles. Her thumbs on the screen, she responds.

 _Thanks, love. Now I'm off to tell the ladies of NY that you're spoken for._

 _Bachelor days are over._

 _I'm replacing your basketballs with throw pillows_.

xxx

It's close to six by the time Donna finds herself standing in Samantha's doorway. Her blonde colleague looks up with a smile once she notices her there.

"Donna, come on in." She waves her hand towards the chair in front.

Donna feels a little anxious as she slowly steps closer. She knows what she needs to do, no matter how awkward the entire conversation is going to be.

"Sorry, I meant to come by earlier, but I figured, now that the day is winding down, it would give us a chance to talk without interruption." Donna sits straight in the chair, legs uncrossed and her hands formally folded on her lap.

Samantha blinks, sensing Donna's less than casual tone. "Ok…sure," she obliges.

"Samantha… there's something I need to tell you," Donna starts, her features earnest. "Thomas and I…well…we're no longer together."

"Oh no, I'm sorry to hear that… Are you ok?" Samantha's asks with concern. "I thought things were going well?"

"I thought so too… until I found out about his wife in Connecticut." Donna presses her lips together for an awkward smile. "I was completely blindsided and I've felt pretty stupid about entire thing. To make things worse, I found out in Paris."

"What!?" Samantha's mouth drops while her eyebrows head in the other direction. "I'm so sorry, Donna. I would have never guessed by the way you've carried yourself at work… And to think he sent you those flowers when you got back. What a jerk."

"Well….that bouquet… it wasn't from Thomas, it was from Harvey." Donna holds her breath, nervously anticipating Samantha's reaction.

Samantha's eyes go wide, her black lashes fluttering in surprise. "Harvey? That was a sweet gesture considering what happened… Wait a minute, what do you mean?... You two aren't involved, are you?"

"Yes…we are… And although it might seem sudden, it's been a long-time coming. Thirteen years actually," she admits. "Harvey is the one who told me about Thomas, and it forced us to talk honestly about some other things… I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier, but I'm still getting used to this myself."

"Ok…Wow…," Samantha says, shifting uncomfortably in her seat, her eyes uncertain where to land. "Well, now I'm sufficiently embarrassed."

"Please don't be. It's ok," Donna interrupts, as she reaches to place her hand on Samantha's. "I actually owe you an apology for not being upfront. I'm sorry… Harvey and I, well, we've been dancing around this for years, and we're both finally ready. No one here knows yet. You're the first person I've told."

"Well, thank you, I appreciate that," Samantha replies, a polite smile on her lips. "I'll keep it to myself."

"Thanks… so… can I at least compliment you on your great taste in men?" Donna asks cheekily, trying to keep things light. "And… are you still interested in a date for the wedding? Because I have an idea …."

Samantha tilts her head. "Maybe… do tell," she says, a curious look in her eyes.

"You mentioned that the good men are getting harder to find," Donna begins. "And I might have a good man for you… no pressure, but it might be fun for the wedding."

"Ok…" Samantha is starting to wonder if Donna is trying to pawn off one of Louis' cousins on her.

"Marcus Specter," Donna says. "Harvey's younger brother. He's a restauranteur, divorced and lives in Boston… he's attractive _and_ a nice guy. He's more laid back than Harvey, and I think he'd be open to a date."

"You'd _think_ he'd be open to it, or you're _sure_ he'd be open to it?" Samantha is a lawyer after all.

"Ok, I already checked," Donna admits with a smile. "I just thought I might help you out, you know, with another handsome Specter boy." The grin reaches Donna's eyes now.

Samantha takes a deep breath and lightly slams her palms down on her desk. "Ok, Donna, this sounds crazy but why not. I've got nothing to lose and everything to gain."

xxx

"So my bachelor days are over, huh?"

Harvey asks, as he gently runs his hand across the pillow to play with Donna's hair. This has quickly become his favourite time of day. Lying in bed with her, without their office armour, making easy conversation and talking about them.

"What gave it away?" she giggles, as she pulls herself closer in his giant king-size bed.

"Well, for one, there's been nothing but red wine around here… Did you hide all my scotch?" he asks playfully. "I've been treating that cactus like a person… and now you have me setting my brother up on dates."

"Yeah, you're officially whipped," Donna teases. "But you wear it _sooo_ well."

Harvey is suddenly quiet, his eyes intensely focused on hers as he strokes her hair.

"Why do you love me?"

Donna's eyebrows suddenly rise, and a slight smile warms her lips.

"Why do I love you?" she repeats. "Because you're you and every time I think about my future, you're all I see."

"Why though? Why me and not someone else?"

"Seriously, Harvey? After all we've been through?" she quizzes.

Donna places her hand on his chest. "Remember how you once said there was 'no _you_ without _me'_? Well… there's 'no _me_ without _you'_. Who we were then, and what we have now, is the most real thing I've ever had in my life. And it's not about needing someone or not wanting to be alone, it's about who you are, who you are to me, and no one else even comes close."

Donna pauses, searching his eyes to see if he understands.

"There's no one like you, Harvey," she continues. "No one drives me crazy like you do, and no one makes me happy like you do. I still can't believe you came to Paris for me… and when I told you to leave, you wouldn't. You have no idea what that meant. I knew then that you were everything… the man I always knew you to be."

Donna takes a deep breath. Her hand now resting on his cheek.

How can I not absolutely love you, Harvey?"

Harvey swallows and nods. Her words caress his heart, gently massaging away every insecurity he's ever had about them.

"Move in with me." His voice is soft but certain. "I don't want to wait anymore."

"Harvey… it's only been a week," she reasons. He's caught her off guard.

"Really? Feels like thirteen years to me," he reasons back.

Donna pauses and takes another deep breath.

"Wow, this is a big step isn't it?" she says, furrowing her brow. "But I think I'd like to meet your mother first…."

"Is that a yes then?" He's hopeful.

"It's a yes to moving in with you. It's a no to your place," she clarifies.

Harvey jerks his head back, confused. "You want me to move in with you? Your place is great, Donna, but it's too small for both of us."

"No, Harvey… I think we need something that's not yours or mine. Something new, something that's ours.. big enough for our families and friends when they visit and, of course, for my wardrobe needs."

"Shit, you're going to buy lots of throw pillows aren't you?" His tone suggesting that he really doesn't care because anywhere with Donna is home.

"Yep... and you're going to love it," she says, her soft mouth brushing his smiling lips.

He closes his eyes at the gentleness of her touch. A place big enough for family suits Harvey just fine.


	18. Chapter 18

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 18**

"Oh My God, Harvey! Morning sex is the _best_ sex!"

Breathless, her body physically spent and glowing, Donna brushes the hair from her face as she slowly rolls onto her back. He's just inches away from her, but just to be sure, Donna instinctively extends her arm to rest across his chest.

"For someone who's not a morning person, you're really something else, you know that?" She turns to compliment him with a breathy smile.

The truth is, it's not really morning sex that she loves. That's just the cherry on top. What's _best_ is waking up tangled in Harvey's arms and hearing his sleepy breath. Every morning together strengthens their bond and reinforces that he's finally hers and hers alone.

Harvey is equally spent, his face and body glistening from this morning's activities. He's very quickly learning that Donna is, most definitely, a morning person. And it's something he's going to have to get used to. It won't be too difficult though. Waking up next to her, fresh-faced with no make-up, is one of the best things he's ever experienced. Without her lip gloss and mascara, she looks younger, cuter, even. Her freckles and the sparkle in her hazel eyes hinting at what Donna would have looked like if he had met her at university.

"Actually…," he says, his chest rising and falling to slow his breath. "Donna sex is the _best_ sex," he grins. There's a comfortable playfulness in the way they interact now. Every day, he notices, they're moving towards something deeper, even talking more freely about the intimacy they share.

Harvey also realizes he doesn't want to go into the office this morning. He could stay like this all day. Another change. In the past, he's never let a relationship alter his plans, especially when it came to his career. The law has been his first and all-encompassing love. In fact, he'd often use office responsibilities as a crutch, a reason to keep his distance.

With Donna, however, it's been just the opposite. That should have been his first clue all those years ago. He used work as an excuse to keep her in his life, even going so far as to pay her salary from his own, just to have her near. Donna and his career have been inextricably linked ever since.

Harvey thinks back to the conversation he had with Louis on the weekend. Louis advised him not to wait, and he's taken that to heart. Donna needs to meet his mother, Marcus and the kids. But given how it all went down the last time his mother met a girlfriend, the entire thing makes him a little nervous.

"Har-vey…" Donna groans, dragging his name out and jolting him from this thoughts. "As much as I don't want to, we've got to get going at some point."

"We have time. Care to join me in the shower? I can make it worth your while," he flirts, his voice low.

"Shower sex? Ugh, there's no woman on the planet who enjoys shower sex," she informs, dismissively shaking her head.

Harvey's eyes go wide, a smile simmering on his lips. He can't wait to hear this. Propping his head onto his elbow, he faces her.

"How can you not like shower sex?" he asks. "It involves hot water and all the best body parts… what's not to love?"

"First of all, someone always gets cold." she states.

"Well, you're supposed to _share_ the water," he explains, as if he has an instruction manual handy. "And, the goal is to feel warm on the _inside_."

Her red hair messy across the pillow, Donna, unconvinced, disagrees with a shake of her head.

"Then, there are tiles, slippery tiles," she continues. "Trust me, there's nothing sexy about a naked butt rubbing against stone and grout, cleaning it like some sort of sponge."

Harvey can't help but chuckle at her dramatics.

"How is that different than doing it on a stone countertop?" he challenges, delving into the logistics now.

"Well, you're horizontal on a countertop," she explains. "There's a height difference in the shower. If you're unfortunate enough to be dating some tall guy… it becomes more Cirque du Soleil than Fifty Shades of Gray."

"Your mind is very interesting, you know that?" he says, giggling at Donna's unique way with words. "You've really thought this through, haven't you?"

He lies back down, wraps an arm around her to draw her near. For all the off-the-wall conversations they've had over the years, this kind of sex talk is definitely new. Sure they've flirted, but there's an unleashed, naughty side to Donna that's adorable and fun and, as Harvey is discovering, also quite a turn-on.

"I most certainly have thought it through…," she responds unapologetically, her head resting comfortably on his chest now. She's no lawyer, but she's laying out a solid case this morning.

"And unless you're turned on by a woman in a shower cap, wet hair is a total pain in the ass for us long-haired gals. Sheep dog hair is _not_ sexy!"

"Sheep dogs might beg to differ," Harvey deadpans, straight-faced and ignoring her point. "And I'd have sex with you in a shower cap."

"No, you wouldn't," she laughs back. "Because you will never see me in a shower cap." She's trying to sound serious between giggles, but she knows Harvey isn't buying it. "So… since the shower is out, where else could we do it?"

"At the office…" he states, without a second thought. It's crossed his mind a time or two.

"Really?" She's had a few of those fantasies herself. "Like you don't spend enough time there already… where exactly?"

"Definitely your old cubicle and my couch… along the name partner wall… the rooftop, maybe, … elevator, for sure, and against my record collection shelves…"

"Rooftop? You _have_ given this some thought, haven't you," her voice is almost congratulatory.

"I most certainly have…," he's very happy to admit. "Now tell me yours, because anyone who thinks that much about shower sex..."

Pulling the bedsheet with her, Donna props herself up on her elbow, her face inches from his.

"At the office? You really want to know?" she whispers, seductively biting her lip as her red locks fall to the side. Harvey knows she's teasing and, biting his own lip, he nods enthusiastically.

"My office at night… with just my lamp on and the stereo playing. The island in the executive kitchen, but only if the countertop is warm and the lights are dimmed. Definitely the elevator, the one next to reception is the slowest and the ceiling is mirrored. And anywhere in the law library… as you know, I like to read," she jokes. "Oh and also… after hours at Hermès… handbag department."

Harvey raises his eyebrows and shake his head in amazement. He saw a little of this side of Donna in Paris, but her quirkiness still manages to catch him off guard.

"Seriously? That's your list? Hermès…why am I not surprised? That's pretty adventurous, Donna, I have to admit."

"You know who's adventurous?" Donna can barely wait to see his reaction.

"Who?"

"Louis and Sheila."

"No, Donna…don't even…" He's waving this topic away.

"You'd never know it to look at them," she interrupts. "But those two are swinging from the chandelier. Louis told me once that they role-played 'name partner and secretary'… and _he_ was the secretary."

"Jesus, Donna! I don't need to hear this…" he winces, like he's just heard fingernails on a chalkboard.

Harvey has a meeting with Louis later today, and the less he can visualize, the better.

"Just so we're clear, I saw a lot more of Louis than I needed to when we went mudding," he complains.

"Alright, alright.…" Donna huffs. They lay quietly together, legs tangled, her arm embracing him while Harvey runs his hand up and down her back. Drowsiness from their lovemaking now setting in. Donna feels his body relax and she gently kisses his chest, her hands trailing across the muscles of his abdomen.

"You know what else?" she asks.

"What?" he mumbles, his eyes closed, savouring their last few minutes in bed together.

"The file room…" she starts. "That's where Mike and Rachel first did it… against the shelves."

Harvey opens his eyes and peers down at Donna, who's now smiling up at him. She knows these kinds of personal details, especially about colleagues, make him crazy.

"The file room, role playing?! Why is everyone telling you this stuff?" Harvey asks in mock horror. "Are you suggesting that strawberries and whipped cream are not adventurous enough for you now? Do I need to step up my game?"

Donna chuckles and wraps her arm protectively around Harvey's waist.

"To each his own, Harvey." Her eyes are now gentle on his. "I've never needed strawberries and whipped cream, not even back then," Donna confides, delivering a sweet kiss to his mouth. "Believe me, you don't need any help, you're one very sexy man, all on your own."

"Really? You sure about that? I could throw a few handbags around the room here if that helps?" Harvey teases, leaning down to kiss the top of her head.

"Nope. And you're even sexier now. Just some Name Partner and COO action is fine with me," she giggles.

"But not in the shower…" Harvey gives it one last effort.

"Never in the shower…" Donna confirms.

"Hot tub?" He throws it out there.

"Ugh, that's even worse!"

"So… that's a no?"

"Harvey!"

xxx

For the first time since Paris, Harvey and Donna exit the elevator together and step out onto the 50th floor. They're both feeling increasingly settled with their new status, and Donna is more confident now that she knows Samantha's view on office romances. While they are not exactly close friends, Donna does respect Samantha's opinion, both as a professional and as a woman.

Standing at reception, Harvey hands Donna her coffee before they head their separate ways. Taking it, she leans in close to whisper in his ear.

"I'll never look at that name partner wall the same way again," she smirks.

"Yeah, I'm going to have problems in the library today," he whispers back with a smile.

With a hot coffee in hand and a fabulous handbag over her shoulder, Donna turns on her heel and saunters down the corridor, her hips moving with their familiar sway. Harvey can't help but watch, stare actually, until she's out of view.

"Good morning, Harvey," Samantha says, breaking his concentration with a knowing smile. "I trust all is well?"

"Hi Samantha." Harvey nods once in silent acknowledgement of the personal information they share about one another. "Things are good. You?"

"Actually, I'm feeling pretty optimistic these days," she remarks. "Thanks for asking."

Coffee in hand, Harvey turns around to take the long walk to his corner of the building.

xxx

After a quick visit to her desk to pick up some files, Donna heads over to see Louis for her first meeting of the day. As the new managing partner, he had requested a review of the current employee policies, and Donna wants to bring a few issues to his attention.

"Hi Donna, have a seat!" he says enthusiastically as he pulls himself closer to his desk. "Did Harvey tell you about our mudding date? I think he actually enjoyed himself."

"He did…" Taking a seat, Donna is slow with her response, wondering how much Louis knows.

"Louis… before we get to this, I need to tell you something," she pauses, her fingers fiddling on her lap. "Harvey and I… we're together. You know this has been a long time coming... It happened in Paris." She waits for a reaction, but Louis doesn't have one. There's just a tiny smile on his face, so she continues, "But I want you to know that it will be status quo at the office. Nothing will change in terms of my abilities as COO."

"I already know," he whispers as he leans towards her. "I suspected something had changed between you two and Harvey all but confirmed it. Not to mention you've been glowing all week."

Donna's eyes widen in surprise. "Did Harvey say something? I told him not to tell anyone until I was ready."

Louis opens his mouth, but then pauses, remembering that Harvey had warned him.

"No… he didn't, but I had questions about why we fired Thomas Kessler and Associates. For months, Harvey's been impossible to be around, and all of a sudden he's calm and relaxed and happy?" Louis confidently states, his face breaking out into a smile. "You think I didn't know you had something to do with that?"

Donna tilts her head and gazes at Louis with appreciation. She lets out a breath, realizing how unsettled she's been about all of this. Thomas's company being dropped, however, is news to her.

"For the record, I'm happy for you and for Harvey," he says, his eyes warm and affectionate. "I've always believed you two were meant to be together. And you both deserve happiness outside of the office."

"Thanks, Louis."

Louis taps his fingers on his desk and continues.

"As for work, Donna, I have no doubt you'll handle things with the utmost professionalism… Harvey, on the other hand...," he jokes.

Donna giggles, relieved. "Thanks, Louis. I'll keep him in line, you have my word."

xxx

Donna's words have been playing on Harvey's mind all day. Yes, she'll move in with him, but not without first meeting his mother. The last time Lily met a girlfriend, it didn't go so well. This time, Harvey wants to make it very clear to his mother that Donna is not just a girlfriend, she's _more._

Sitting back in his leather club chair, he takes out his phone.

"Hi Mom."

"Harvey! So nice to hear from you. How are you?" Lily's voice ringing with surprise and excitement.

"Good, Mom… great actually."

"Really? Well, that makes me happy to hear. To what do I owe the pleasure of this call?"

"Well, first, I just wanted to check in… everything ok?"

"Everything's fine. Bobby and I have been helping Marcus out with the kids, and they seem to be adjusting as well as can be expected," she says. "He's got his own apartment near the market and Katie and the kids are in the house. It hasn't been easy, but we're managing.

"Good, that's what I want to hear." Harvey clears his throat, memories of his own family breakdown and Bobby's role rattling his brain. It's not lost on him that both he and Donna have been through this kind of hurt. He's determined to never let it happen to them or to the family he hopes to have one day.

"What else is on your mind, son?"

"Mom, I want you to meet someone, well, Donna. I know Marcus has mentioned her, but… I'd like you to get to know her…"

There's a silence on the line.

"Harvey… I'd love to… Donna is your someone special, isn't she?"

"She is… she's more than that actually… a lot more."

"Really? I am so happy…. and relieved, if you want to know the truth," Lily admits. "I was afraid that what happened between us was the reason you've never settled down. I can't wait to meet her. How did this happen, sweetheart?"

"I have a lot to tell you, but Donna and I… it's been a long time coming, and I guess I finally got the courage. She really wants to meet you too, Mom."

"Ok. Would you two like to come here for a night? Maybe this weekend? Marcus has the kids. We could have dinner and spend some time getting to know her."

"I'll check with Donna, but I'd like that."

"I can't wait to see you. I love you, Harvey."

"Love you too, Mom."

xxx

Donna walks into her apartment and drops her keys on the glass table at the entrance. Harvey is already there after leaving the office early for an offsite meeting. He's sitting on the sofa nursing a glass of scotch. Donna can see the dining room table is set for dinner.

"Well, this is a surprise," she says, expressionless, as she kicks off her shoes. "I thought you were going to be late."

"My meeting ended early, so I thought I'd get a jump on dinner here." Harvey can sense something is on her mind. "I broke in with my new key."

He grins, but notices she's not returning it.

"Long day?" he asks, as he walks over to give her a kiss. Donna obliges but then quickly leans back.

"Why didn't you tell me you fired Thomas Kessler and Associates?" she asks. Harvey is taken aback. Not by the question, but by her tone.

He presses his lips together and tenses his jaw. "Why does it matter? He needed to go."

"But he's not your client, he's Alex's," she challenges.

"And I gave him one of mine to make up for it," Harvey says suddenly feeling defensive. "I thought you'd be happy he's gone."

"This is exactly what I was afraid of. My personal life affecting business decisions, yours and now Alex's." Donna is clearly frustrated.

"I fired him," he clarifies. "He lied to me, to you and to Louis."

"If we fired every client who's ever lied to us we'd be out of business," she says. "You did this because I was dating him and you didn't like it!"

"Fine. I admit it, I didn't like it. And I also didn't want you to be the reason he destroys his family," he says, exasperated.

"What?" She steps back in disbelief.

"Donna…" Harvey steps in, reaching for her arm." He didn't just have a wife and son. His wife…she's pregnant, they're expecting another child any day now... and Thomas was preparing to leave her."

Donna's eyes instantly tear up. "What? Why did you keep this from me? You didn't think I could handle it?!"

"No! I didn't think I could handle it!" Harvey snaps back, his palms open towards her. "I saw pictures of you two together, dancing and… kissing… you thinking he was honest… and then pictures of him with his family, holding his wife's hand and touching her belly. I couldn't take it!"

"And so you fired him," she says, wiping a tear from her cheek. "To keep him as far away from me as possible. I could have handled it!"

"It was more than that. To also keep him away from the Firm. Vanessa discovered that he was involved in a few shady deals. Guys who operate that way in their personal lives do the same in their professional lives. He wasn't worth the risk to the Firm... and to you." Harvey is sounding calmer now. "It was as much a business decision as it was a personal one. You know that not everything is black and white."

Harvey searches Donna's eyes, hoping she understands. He's often operated in the gray to make things right, trading in the professional for the personal. This is nothing new.

Donna exhales in frustration, her eyes traveling around the apartment. Then she catches Harvey's gaze.

"I'm sorry," she says, looking at him through wet lashes. "I overreacted. I just don't want you to keep things from me. I want us to work, and it won't if we keep things from each other."

Harvey exhales and drops his shoulders. "Ok, I'm sorry… you were so hurt in Paris, I didn't think telling you the rest would help," he says as he pulls her in for a hug. His arms wrapped securely around her.

"And I'm sorry you had to lose a client for that," she says, her voice muffled as he presses her close.

"Yeah, well, clients come and go, but there's only one Donna and she's irreplaceable," he says, tightening his embrace.

After they both feel a little calmer, Harvey takes her by the hand and leads her to the sofa. "Wine or scotch?"

His question stops Donna in her tracks. She realizes that Harvey really is ready for the next step. They've each lived alone for a long time. Now that they plan to move in together, there will have to be compromises and acceptance of who they are as individuals. Throw pillows and record collections. Sports memorabilia and pretty soaps. Wine _and_ scotch.

"Definitely wine," she says, dropping to the sofa, and tucking her feet under her thigh. Harvey waits for Donna to take her first sip before starting.

"So… I talked to my mom today," he starts. "Wondering if we could go for a night this weekend to spend time with her, Marcus, the kids… and Bobby."

Setting her glass on the coffee table, Donna looks at him cautiously. "You ready to accept that?"

"I'm trying to…" Harvey sighs, as he leans back on the sofa, his arm extended across the top.

"It's time, Harvey," she says, gently placing her hand on his leg. "Didn't you just say that not everything is black and white? Time to let it go."

He nods, trying to process what that might look like.

"You ready to meet my mother?" he asks, knowing that Donna has heard the worst about her.

"I am," she says confidently. "And I'm going to let her know how lucky I am to be with her boy."

"Thanks, Donna." Harvey says, her words warming his heart because she always knows just what to say.

"I talked to Louis today, told him how you're desperately in love with me," Donna says grinning. "He's very supportive... How do you feel about a double date sometime?"

"Fine, as long as it doesn't involve mudding or role playing," Harvey says sarcastically. "Have you talked to Robert?"

Donna shakes her head "no", as she nestles closer to him on the sofa.

"He'll be fine… Mike and Rachel met at the office… I bet he has no idea what went on in the file room, though," Harvey jokes.

"And let's make sure he never will!" she giggles. "So… Boston this weekend?"

"Boston this weekend," Harvey agrees.


	19. Chapter 19

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 19**

 **Hi everyone!**

 **Before we get going here, I wanted to thank you all so much for your reviews. They are thoughtful and helpful, and I read every one. As for the guest reviewers, although I'm not able to respond to you on this site, please know that I see and appreciate them all.**

 **So, here we go. Lots of family dynamics in this one. Hope you all enjoy!**

 **From Paris to... Boston. This is part 1 of 2.**

This weekend in Boston is a big deal, so he isn't sure what to choose. The silver Bentley is pure luxury, but maybe just a little rich, even for his taste. A red Ferrari? No, too showy, and it screams mid-life crisis. The midnight blue Aston Martin Roadster? Yes. Perfect. V8 engine. It's a nice machine. Even James Bond thought so. Powerful, good-looking and hugs the curves well.

 _I can relate to that_ , Harvey jokes to himself, as the car club attendant hands over the keys.

This adventure is just another first of many that Harvey has had recently. Bringing a woman home to meet his mother is going to be another. Lily's met high school girlfriends, and then there was that disaster dinner with Paula. But to Boston? For an overnight? Donna is the first and last woman he ever plans to do that with, and he's feeling both shaken and stirred about how it all might go down.

Visiting his mother's house, the one she and Bobby bought a few years back will also be new. He can already feel it… another change forcing him out of his comfort zone. Now he's going to be sleeping there, with Donna… and with his mother and Bobby just steps away.

Lipschitz had encouraged him to breathe through his anxiousness and to visualize positive outcomes. That's what he's got in his back pocket if it all becomes too much. Plus, having Donna at his side helps. She's always been a secret weapon of sorts.

On a Saturday, it's a three-hour drive, but Harvey opts for the longer, scenic route along the coast, which should get them there by early afternoon. It's a quick visit, but just enough family time to break the ice.

"You nervous?" he asks, his left hand on the steering wheel and his right on the gear shift.

Donna is casual in a loose, white summer dress. It's a look he's only seen a couple of times, but one he's always loved on her.

"Is it that obvious?" Donna responds, staring out the window as the concrete gives way to open fields and water.

"Well, you haven't touched your coffee or complained about my music," Harvey grins, his eyes dancing between the road and her profile. "You don't fool me as easily as you used to, you know."

"Just thinking what it might be like for your mother to meet the woman in her son's life," Donna sighs. She can't put her finger on it, but she's not convinced Lily is going to welcome her with open arms.

"I think I'd be emotional. Even if my son was as old as you," she says with a smirk and a pat on his lap.

"You certainly didn't think I was old last night," he counters."In fact, your exact words were …' _Oh my God Harvey, you have the stamina of a teenager_ …'"

"We used an entire can of whipped cream… I mean, if that doesn't scream endurance, then I don't know what does," she giggles.

Forcing a sip of her coffee, Donna huffs, and then turns to Harvey. "I'm serious… what if your mom and I don't click? It's possible."

"My father loved you and my mother will, too." Frankly, Harvey finds it unthinkable that anyone would not be taken with Donna upon meeting her.

But in truth, he's nervous, too. Although he's patched things up with his mother, Donna could be right. Who knows what Lily might think. She once told him Paula was a "keeper", a suggestion that, to this day, makes the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end.

Reaching for her hand, Harvey adds, "I can't believe I'm saying this, but just be yourself… you're always at your best when you are."

xxx

As the car slowly pulls up to the house, Donna waves to Marcus and Bobby, who are watching the kids play out front.

Donna looks over at Harvey. " Are you ready for this?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," he sighs, seeing the two men.

As they get out, Hailey and Henry run to meet their Uncle with hugs and kisses, and he introduces them to Donna.

"Hey loser! Hi Donna! Glad you could make it!" Marcus ribs as he walks towards them. He gives Harvey a brotherly pat on the back and then turns to hug Donna.

"Nice to finally meet the woman who's put up with Harvey for so long," he kids. "You're a legend around these parts!" Marcus's playful dig earns him an eye roll from Harvey.

Bobby also leans across to give Donna a hug. She's a little caught off guard but appreciates the gesture. "So happy you could make it, Donna. Welcome to Boston."

 _Harvey apparently comes from a family of huggers,_ she estimates.

"Thanks for the warm welcome. It's finally nice to meet everyone in person," Donna responds affectionately.

Next, Bobby shifts his attention to Harvey. The last time they had spoken was years earlier, at Marcus's house, and it was charged. In an effort to press the reset button, Bobby extends his hand.

"Harvey, good to see you."

Harvey holds his breath, presses his lips tight and shakes Bobby's hand. It's brief, but it's something.

"Nice place you got here," he comments, scanning the front of the house in an effort to avoid eye contact.

Giving the two-storey saltbox a once-over, Harvey notices how inviting and well-kept the place is. It's painted a sunny yellow and white, with a blue front door and shutters. Hummingbirds zoom around a hanging feeder, and a colorful mix of dahlias, peonies and, of course, lilies, decorate the front yard.

But it's the porch swing that really catches Harvey's attention. It takes him back to the one of his childhood home, where, on hot summer nights, his mother would read her boys bedtime stories.

Just then, Lily bounds through the front door and across the lawn to welcome the couple. Dressed in a light blue cotton skirt and top, she immediately wraps her arms around Harvey, and gives him a kiss on the cheek. "Hello, sweetheart. I'm so happy you made it."

Harvey lingers in his mother's arms, and seeing him like this warms Donna's heart.

Then Harvey's mother turns towards her, so Donna leans in, expecting a hug, just as the others had done. But Lily quickly offers her hand instead, greeting Donna with a pleasant but simple handshake.

"So you're Donna… it's nice to finally meet you."

Donna quickly recovers by delivering a warm smile and, as a show of affection, placing her other hand on top of the elder woman's. "I'm so happy to finally meet you, too. Thank you for having me."

Lily nods, and turns back to Harvey. "You both must be tired from the drive. Come in and I'll show you to your room. The bed sheets are still drying on the line, I'll sort them out later."

The five adults make their way into the house, and Harvey and Donna head upstairs to set their things in the guest room. The space is compact but comfortable. Harvey scans the room, his eyes catching sight of a few familiar items... childhood photographs, his baseball trophy and glove, and his mother's early paintings.

"You were a cute kid," Donna says, as she takes a picture frame off the dresser. "Even the hair was pretty back then," she quips.

Harvey lets out a long sigh, his fingers traveling across the worn leather of his old glove. Then, his eyes find the old trophy and he carefully inspects his name engraved on the brass plaque.

"Haven't thought about this stuff in a long time... There wasn't a day that I didn't have that glove with me."

Donna walks over and rubs circles on Harvey's back. "I think it's great that she still has all of this," she says. "People are too quick to get rid of family heirlooms."

"You think an old trophy and glove are heirlooms?" Harvey challenges.

"I think that if we're ever lucky enough to have little ones, I'd like to show them someday," she smiles sweetly, while gently slipping her hand into his. "And I'd like to hear you tell them all about how you won that trophy."

Her words bring an instant smile to Harvey's face, and he can feel his heart swell. Here he is stuck in the past, and she offers him a glimpse of the future. A positive outcome, as Lipschitz would say. And it's moments like these that remind Harvey why Donna Paulsen is the love of his life.

After settling in, the pair head downstairs. Donna with a hostess gift and Harvey with the Eiffel Tower puzzle from Paris. Making her way into the kitchen, Donna can hear the rowdy excitement echoing down the hall as the children tear open their gift.

"Lily, I brought you a little something from New York," Donna says sweetly. On the kitchen island, she places an exquisite porcelain cake pedestal, adorned with lace cut-outs around the perimeter. Then, she hands over a white box filled with decadent treats from the best pastry shop in Manhattan.

"The pastries are for now, of course, and the platter is for family celebrations," she suggests. "Maybe it will get a lot of use, as I hope Harvey and I will be able to visit more often."

The elder woman wipes her hands on a tea towel and looks up at Donna.

"That's very generous of you, although you really didn't need to… but thank you, Donna," she says, a polite smile on her lips.

"You're welcome," Donna replies. Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, she feels a little deflated.

As Lily turns away to tend to BBQ preparation, Donna scans the room and tries, once again, to reach out.

"How can I help you with dinner?" she asks enthusiastically, hoping to get to know Harvey's mother better during the busy work of food prep.

"I'm almost finished, but Bobby and Marcus are out on the deck, why don't you bring them this lemonade," she suggests handing Donna a tray with a pitcher and glasses. "Harvey likes to BBQ, so I think I'll put him to work."

Donna makes her way outside. She lays the tray on the patio table, and notices that it's just her and Marcus on the deck. Bobby is on a phone call and pacing the backyard.

"Harvey's good with the kids," he says to Donna, as she pours two glasses. "It's nice to see them having fun with their uncle. He doesn't come by enough."

"They're great kids," Donna compliments, and moves to sit next to him. Even in the late afternoon shade, the backyard is scorching hot and Donna is grateful for her choice of dress.

"I give all the credit to Katie," he says sadly, taking a sip of his drink.

"I'm sorry about what happened," Donna responds. She hesitates to bring up the wedding, but decides to anyway. "I know Harvey asked you about Samantha and the wedding. If you really don't feel ready, it's ok. I can tell her and I'm sure she'll understand, too."

"No, no, it's not that," Marcus responds. "It's probably good for me to get out there. But… you know… I haven't been on a date in a good fifteen years. I'm not even sure how to."

With a caring smile, and her eyes gentle on him, Donna suggests, "Well… the first thing is to not put too much pressure on yourself. You're a great guy, and I'm sure Samantha will be just as nervous as you are."

"What's she like, Donna?" Marcus is curious.

"Honestly? She's a female Harvey… but she looks much better in lipstick and heels," she chuckles.

"Great… at least I know what I'm dealing with," he says, rolling his eyes.

"And what I mean by that is…," Donna explains, her hand softly touching his arm. "She might appear tough on the outside, but she's really very sensitive and sweet on the inside. So don't let her fool you."

Marcus nods and says, "I can't even remember the last time I wore a real suit."

"Well, that's an easy fix! Leave it with me," Donna says. "I'll ask Harvey's guy. Get me your measurements and I'll take care of it."

"Really?" He's surprised at her generous offer.

"Yes, really," Donna says with a tilt of her head and a reassuring smile. "It's your first date in a while, you want to look and feel confident, right?"

"Yeah, that would be nice," he agrees, a shy smile on his face.

"Consider it done! If there's one thing I've learned from watching Harvey all these years..." A grin spreading across her face. "It's that there's just something about a man in a nice suit…"

"Thanks, Donna." She can hear the gratitude in his voice.

"It's my pleasure." And he can hear the kindness in hers.

xxx

"Harvey, dear, would you mind helping me in the kitchen?" Lily asks from the other side of the house.

Harvey is surrounded by puzzle pieces, and to the disappointment of his niece and nephew, he leaves them to start without him.

'Sure, what can I do?" he asks.

"You can help with the salad and… you can tell your mother what's happening in your life," she instructs with a smile. "You seem quite taken with Donna."

Prepping the salad vegetables at the island, Harvey glances up, "There's no one like her, Mom."

"What do you mean?" Lily asks, trying to look busy, but hanging on his every word.

"Since early in my career, she's been my friend, my best friend, actually. We've gone through a lot together, and she's always been there… I trust her completely. I'd do anything for Donna..."

"I'm happy for you…," Lily replies. And she is, but Harvey's words also sting a little. Donna's been there and she hasn't. Now he's starting a new life with this woman, and that will likely mean Harvey having even less time for his family.

"There's a joke between us that her job has been to save me from myself," Harvey chuckles, as he tosses the vegetables into a bowl. "There's some truth to that… I wouldn't here without her. But it's not all one-sided, I've taken care of her and think I'm good for her, too."

"I can't tell you how relieved I am Harvey, I never wanted to see you alone," Lily says, wrestling with a smile that doesn't quite make it to her eyes. She is relieved, but her feelings are complicated. "I hope you're as special to her as she is to you."

"I am." Harvey can't help himself, a boyish grin spreads across his face. "I asked her to move in with me… You know what she said?"

Curious and a little surprised, Lily turns to him with a familiar tilt of her head.

"Not until she met you first… and when we do, our place needs to be big enough for all our family and friends to visit."

Lily takes in Harvey's words. Now she's relieved. Donna is not taking her son away. If anything she's bringing him back.

"Call it mother's intuition, but I think Donna's right for you, Harvey," Lily tells him.

"She is," he agrees, his eyes wide and the boyish smile still there.

With the steaks and burgers ready for the grill, the family gathers on the back deck to enjoy dinner.

Having a meal together like this is uncharted territory, so everyone is on their best behaviour. There's some unfinished business, for sure, but there's also lots of chatter, banter and even laughter.

Marcus asks about the Aston Martin, Lily tells Donna about her art students, Harvey informs the table about Donna's theatrical career, Bobby keeps piling food on everyone's plates, Donna recounts sightseeing in Paris, Hailey shows everyone what she learned in dance class and Henry loses a tooth biting into a hamburger.

As dinner winds down, Donna lays her hand on Harvey's lap and gives him a knowing look.

 _This is nice._

Harvey places his hand over hers and squeezes it.

 _It sure is._

After dinner, the couple offers to help to clean up, but Lily insists that she and Bobby do it, leaving Donna and Harvey to spend time with Marcus and the kids. The brothers enjoy the back deck while Donna makes good on a promise she made to the children.

xxx

"So… loser, you've never brought anyone home before. You think she's the one? If not, you better have a damn good reason why because Donna is great." Marcus states, as he hands Harvey a beer. The evening air is thick, the shrill of cicadas chirping away as the sun fades.

Taking a sip of his drink, Harvey turns to his younger brother.

"Donna? Yeah, she is…" he responds, expressionless.

"For a guy who's supposed to be in love, you don't seem too happy about it," Marcus says, studying his brother's features. He'd recognize that stressed-out, clenched jaw anywhere. It's a Specter family trademark.

"To tell you the truth… I'm pretty scared," Harvey admits, his eyes now focused on the bottle as his fingers fiddle with the label. "When it comes to long and happy marriages, our family hasn't exactly had the best record."

Marcus leans forward in his seat, his elbows on his knees. He hears the hurt in his brother's voice. When their parents' marriage fell apart, Harvey harboured a lot guilt over keeping secret their mother's affair. The breakup hit him especially hard.

Marcus knows his divorce has also sent Harvey into a tailspin, his older brother once telling him how much he admired the family life he and Katie had built.

"What's crazy is I've wanted this for… a long time," Harvey admits. "But coming back here… and all the changes, it could just as easily fall apart with her. Look at what happened to you and Katie."

Marcus hangs his head and shakes it.

"You know what my biggest regret is, Harvey?" Marcus turns his remorseful eyes towards his brother. "That I put the least amount of effort into protecting what was most important to me… It wasn't a gambling mistake that ruined my marriage, Harvey, it was taking Katie for granted."

"What do you mean?" Harvey furrows his brow trying to understand.

"I mean I got lazy… we both did, and we grew apart… then when our marriage needed fixing, it was too late..."

Marcus pauses, then a wistful smile forms.

"I used to give Katie flowers and a nice note on the first day of every month... A different bouquet each time, because I knew it made her happy. We'd celebrate anniversaries just for the hell of it… first date, first fight… first anything. Then, when the kids were babies, we'd talk and drink tea in bed until she'd fall asleep on me… It wasn't much, but we made time for each other."

Marcus pauses again. This time, his mind picturing those early days.

"Then, life got busier… I was at the restaurant nearly every night, and we stopped doing those things. I'd even forget to kiss her goodnight sometimes, started treating her more like a roommate than the amazing woman that she is."

"I'm sorry, Marcus," Harvey says. "I had no idea."

"You want a happy marriage, Harvey?" Marcus asks, with a hand to his brother's shoulder. "Give it the kind of attention you give your big cases. Fight for it. Protect it. Women aren't actually that complicated. But what I've learned is that it's not enough to love them… you have to make them feel loved… and if you feel about her the way I think you do, then you're half-way there."

 _Make sure she feels loved_ … The words spinning in Harvey's brain. He wonders what that might mean to Donna.

"Maybe if I had just valued what flowers and a real goodnight kiss meant to Katie... it might have turned out differently for us," the younger Specter sighs, the weight of his regret rattling in his voice.

"Marcus…" Harvey says, with an appreciative glance. "For a younger brother, you're pretty smart."

"I haven't felt too smart lately, but I'll take it," Marcus says, standing and reaching for the screen door. "I have to get the kids to bed."

With the screen door slamming behind him, Marcus walks into the cool of the air-conditioned house. He's drawn to the noise of excited laughter coming from the living room. He hasn't heard that sound in a long time, and he soaks it in.

"Daddy! We're camping!" Hailey proudly announces. "Donna helped us build a giant fort so we can sleep here tonight."

The entire room is covered with blankets and sheets, the glow of a flashlight shining through the mess of fabric.

Donna peaks her head out from between two blanket-covered chairs, her red hair is as dishevelled as the room. "I hope it's ok with you, Marcus. Lily was fine with it, as long as you were."

Marcus smiles, understanding even more now why Harvey is so taken with this woman. "As long as Grammy Lily gets her living room back in the morning."

Just then, the screen door slams, and Harvey comes in to stand beside his brother. Henry runs to his uncle, and tugs on his hand.

"Uncle Harvey, look what Donna helped us make. We're camping tonight!"

"There's no way Donna built this," Harvey jokes. "The closet's too small."

"I can hear you!" A muffled voice sounds from inside the fort, earning a laugh from both brothers.

Marcus shuffles the kids upstairs for their bedtime routine, leaving Donna and Harvey alone in the living room.

"You gonna stand guard all night or are you going to join me?" Donna asks from below.

Harvey kneels down to peek into the tent. Donna, immersed in the glow from the red blankets above, is relaxing across a row of pillows.

"Wow, you really have an eye for design. The flashlight chandelier is a nice touch," he quips.

"I can pretty much make any house a home," she says with a sly smile, knowing full well what they're both thinking.

Kicking off his shoes, Harvey crawls into the fort and squeezes in next to Donna.

"And you're going to be an amazing mother one day…" he remarks.

A blush rises on her cheeks. "Thanks to you, Louis and Robert, I've had lots of practice recently," she volleys back.

Harvey has to catch his breath, his heart suddenly pulsing with an overwhelming wave of love and adoration for this woman. Sometimes, like tonight, he can feel it build inside of him. Other times, like when he's at work or when she just comes to mind, it hits him out of the blue.

Without saying a word, Harvey gently placess his warm mouth on hers. It's a tender, purposeful kiss that takes Donna by surprise, but her body instantly melts into his. With every turn of his head, he deepens the kiss, carefully guiding her closer while their tongues dance in agreement. The butterflies in Donna's stomach scatter in every direction now, sending shivers down her arms and legs. All she can do is follow his very determined lead.

As taken aback as Donna is, she also understands. This is a different kind of kiss, one borne of an overpowering emotional need rather than a physical one. She also knows Harvey well enough to know that the reason for it will show itself soon enough.

Pulling back, she ribs him. "I didn't know you were such a fan of camping."

"I was hoping there'd be a boy scout badge for this." His smile bringing out the laugh lines around his eyes.

Seconds later, Hailey and Henry force their way through the blanketed entrance. "Uncle Harvey, are you camping too?!" The excited boy asks.

"Not sure there's enough room for that, but we can read a bedtime story in here," Harvey offers.

"Let's read _The Gruffalo_ ," Hailey suggests. Pulling the book from her backpack, she hands it to Harvey.

"A mouse took a stroll in the deep, dark woods. A fox saw the mouse, and the mouse looked good…," he begins.

Donna can't help but smile to herself. Hearing Harvey Specter read a storybook has pretty much made her day. Every day he provides a glimpse into parts of himself she hasn't yet discovered, and she loves it.

For the better part of a half hour, the foursome huddle under the flashlight chandelier of the giant fort, enjoying the story, its pictures and the closeness it brings. Once the children begin dozing off, the couple carefully tuck them in, and sneak out of the tent.

"Seems to me the fort is quite a hit," Lily whispers as she leans in the doorway. "Your bedroom is ready now. There are fresh towels on the dresser… and two cups of peppermint tea on the bedside table."

"That's so sweet, Lily. Thank you," Donna responds in a hushed voice, careful not to wake the children.

"Thanks, Mom," Harvey whispers back. The mention of peppermint tea awakens another childhood memory. Peppermint tea is his mother's favourite. When he was small, she would come into his room to kiss him goodnight, always with a cup of peppermint tea in hand.

 _I guess not all my memories are bad ones_ , he realizes.

Just as the couple is about to head upstairs, Lily gently places her hand on Donna's arm.

"The boys are taking the kids to swim lessons in the morning, and I'm going to walk the trail behind the house. Would you like to join me?" she asks.

Donna is caught off-guard by the offer. Not that she expected to instantly connect with Harvey's mother, but since arriving, she hasn't felt that Lily has cared much for her company.

"I'd like that, Lily," she replies. "I'll see you bright and early tomorrow."

"Good night, Mom," Harvey says.

"Good night, you two."

With that, Harvey slips his hand into Donna's, and they quietly tiptoe up the stairs.


	20. Chapter 20

**THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 20**

 **Hi everyone, thank you for making it all the way to the FINAL CHAPTER of THAT PARIS WEEKEND. I've had fun and I hope you did too. Thank you to everyone who has commented and encouraged me, you all know who you are. I've appreciated it.**

 **As I write this, I'm not certain what the future holds for _Suits_. But the love story between Donna Paulsen and Harvey Specter is timeless. So... if you ever need a Darvey fix, please come back. Follow them through the streets of Paris, and then back home as they navigate their relationship among colleagues and family, and against their own insecurities. **

**I hope you see Harvey's growth, and appreciate how he strives to become an even better man for the love of his life. Donna also changes, allowing herself to become more vulnerable, and truthful about who she is. With each chapter they've grown, become closer and have learned how to support one another.**

 **I also hope the silly banter and one-liners have brought smiles, the heartfelt confessions have given you butterflies, and the love scenes have been swoonworthy.**

 **There will be more _Suits-_ related stories from me in due time, so keep an eye out. XO**

 **Because it's the final, it's a wee bit longer, so here we go...**

 **THAT PARIS WEEKEND CHAPTER 20 (Boston Part 2 of 2)**

"So… this is cozy," Harvey remarks with a grin, as they both adjust their bodies on the creaky wrought iron bed.

"They call it a double bed because it's so narrow, your chances of getting lucky actually _double_ ," Donna giggles.

Laughing, Harvey draws her body even closer. Donna and her ridiculous sense of humour.

"You sayin' you wanna get lucky?" he flirts. Even though they've teased for years, there was always a line, and asking Donna something like this would have forced an explanation that Harvey wasn't ready to give.

"On this creaky bed?" she questions, her palm on his chest and legs tangled in his. "Every time we shift, the entire house probably thinks we're at it. I need to face your mother in the morning."

Harvey gives his head a small shake. They're both long past their teenage years, so he can't believe he's even saying this. "She probably already suspects that we've done it, Donna."

"Well, she and I aren't best friends yet, so I'm not taking any chances," Donna whispers, as if Lily might hear. "I don't need her knowing I deflowered her son."

"Deflowered?" he chuckles. Her fancy language only encourages him further as he places tempting kisses along her neck while his fingertips tease her silk nightgown. "I think it's a little late for that. You deflowered me years ago," he says between kisses.

"I certainly did," she giggles, easing her neck back. "And I'm very happy to deflower you again, but not on your mother's creaky guest bed."

Harvey lets out a frustrated sigh. He gets it though. Last week, he did the very same thing when Donna's father visited. She asked Harvey to stay, and he wouldn't even consider sleeping over, let alone having sex, with Jim sleeping steps away in the other room.

Pulling back, he locks his eyes on hers. His dark pupils, full of adoration, become wide. Donna feels the heat of his gaze and it awakens the butterflies.

"That's quite a look you're giving me," she remarks, the faint scent of the bedside peppermint tea teasing her nostrils.

"You know I love you, right?" he asks, his index finger caressing her chin. Marcus's words of advice have been rattling his brain all evening.

"Of course I do," Donna whispers, sensing that Harvey is unsettled.

"You feel it, right?" He's not even sure if he completely understands the question.

"Harvey… where's this coming from?" Donna frowns, she's starting to feel uneasy.

"I'm serious." He steadies her chin with his fingers, ensuring he holds her gaze. "What do I do that makes you feel loved?"

First the fort kiss and now the questions. Donna is starting to understand. Staying at his mother's house and seeing Marcus on his own, has clearly stirred Harvey's insecurities.

"Are you ready for my list?" she asks, with a reassuring smile. "Because it's a long one."

"Really?" Harvey's not convinced. He knows what she's trying to do. But he doesn't want reassurance, he wants honesty.

"Yes, really. Now get out your pen and paper," she teases.

"Hmmm… feeling that you love me… let's start with… flying to Paris? Seriously, Harvey?" Donna affectionately rolls her eyes. "The Eiffel Tower? All those fireworks the next morning?" She playfully reminds him with an eyebrow seductively raised.

Donna pauses to gauge Harvey's reaction. He's quiet, almost expressionless, but his eyes tell her he knows what she's doing. They're lying so close, she can feel his chest rise and fall in time with hers. When he asked, her instinct was to go back to what she's always done… give him a big dose of reassurance to keep those insecurities at bay. But she's sensing something different.

 _He really is serious_ , she thinks.

This is not about him. This is about her.

Donna takes a breath and briefly closes her eyes. Not that she needs to dig too deep to find the answers, but this is about her needs, and they've never before spoken about her needs in this way.

"Ok…," she starts, her pulse rising a little. "Remember when I told you the best part of my dreams was waking up wrapped in your arms? That's pretty much how I've woken up every morning since… You heard me, didn't you?"

"I did," Harvey responds, his voice soft but certain.

"And when you asked me what I wanted? I told you I wanted to someone to share Christmases and Thanksgivings and… babies with…."

Donna catches her breath. She's still surprised at how blatantly honest she was when he asked. "After we made love, you repeated every word back to me… You really heard me then, didn't you?"

Harvey nods, signaling he's heard her once again.

"When I know you've heard me like that, Harvey, I feel loved."

Donna's eyes start to mist. She didn't expect this conversation would affect her like this.

"Something else…." Donna swallows to contain the emotion pounding in her chest. "You've put me first on more than one occasion recently… in Paris, at home and at the office. It hasn't always been this way between us, you know. That hasn't been our pattern. So, when you've considered my needs or put them above your own, I've felt that love."

Harvey closes his eyes for a second, taking in her heartfelt words. He knew Donna would have something to tell him, but he didn't expect this. Actually, he didn't know what to expect. For years, he's cared for her, he'd even admit now to it being love, but Marcus is right. That's not enough to keep a woman like her.

Donna needs to feel his love on her terms, not his. While the grand gestures and even the expensive gifts have been appreciated over the years, it's clear to him now. What makes Donna really feel loved is to be appreciated, heard and her feelings considered.

This makes total sense. Every fight they've ever had has been because he's failed her in that way. Harvey thinks back to who he was when they first met, a young man who couldn't think past his own needs. Years later, when he planned on leaving the firm, he just assumed she'd go. Didn't even think to ask her. The memory of him doing that stuns him now.

 _What the hell was I thinking?_

He still doesn't completely understand why she stuck around so long, waiting for him to figure himself out. All he knows is that he is beyond grateful that she did.

"My beautiful flowers…," she says, bringing him back to their conversation. "I would have appreciated anything. You think I didn't notice that they were from the best florist in Manhattan? I know you, Harvey… you wanted me to have the best. You've set me and this relationship apart… I felt it then."

"You're right," he whispers, the corners of his mouth slowly curling into a smile as he places his forehead on hers.

"I'm not done yet…" she says, pulling back to hold his gaze.

"There's something about your touch, Harvey… your hands and being close to me like this." Donna can feel the water pooling in her eyes now. "Maybe it's because we've kept our distance for so long, but every time we touch, I feel it, and I need that from you. It reassures me, so don't stop… ok?"

"Ok…promise," he whispers. "But why the tears?"

"Because no one has ever cared enough before to ask what you just asked me… even _that_ tells me …" Her voice trails off. She can't finish.

Donna has never felt more vulnerable than she feels right now. For years, her "know-it-all" confidence has allowed her to keep an emotional distance. Not just with Harvey, but in every relationship. But now, she has nothing left. It's all out there. What she wants and what she needs. He knows everything and he has all of her.

With her tears trickling down, Donna still manages a smile. "I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting this tonight."

Harvey wipes the droplets from her cheeks and returns the smile. "Guess I never thought it would hit a nerve like it did. But I'm glad I asked."

"What happened that you'd want to know this?" she asks.

"Talking to Marcus about Katie," Harvey sighs.

"Are you feeling unsure, because it's ok…" Donna swallows, her insecurities percolating. No matter how certain Harvey says he is, there's still a tiny part of her that expects it to all fall apart. "We can slow things down… if it's all too fast."

"Why? Is that what you want?" he asks, his worried eyes darting between hers. Now Harvey wonders if Donna is having doubts. It's become clearer to him that he's not the only one struggling.

"I asked because I don't want to repeat the mistakes our families have made," he clarifies. "Is this all too fast for you, Donna? Moving in and everything?"

"I'm still adjusting… but no, I never want to go back," she admits, as she wipes away a stray tear. "When good things happen, sometimes I'm petrified they'll just be taken away one day."

"I think I know that feeling," he says, brushing the hair from her face. "It's already happened to the both of us, hasn't it? With our families… But it's not going to happen to us."

Donna nods in agreement. Clearing her throat, she regains her composure with some Lipschitz-style 'positive outcome'.

"Not every relationship fails. People do stay together…" Her words are just as much for her as for him. "My grandparents, Ray and his wife, Robert and Laura, and… I know you don't want to think about this, Harvey, but your mother and Bobby have been together for a very long time," she reminds him. "That's also commitment."

Harvey sighs and adjusts his position in the bed, the frame creaking with every turn. "You're right. I guess coming back here just brought it all back… and you know me, Donna. I like being prepared. That's why I asked."

"Do you think you can ever accept your mother and Bobby's relationship? We _are_ staying at their house…" she says.

"I'm trying. Accepting it feels like I'm betraying my father," he confesses.

"I don't think your father would want this, Harvey." Her words gently nudging him. "Maybe you can find a way to be ok with it for the sake of family. For your mother, Marcus and the children.. and for your happiness."

Harvey nods, grateful that this beautiful woman is now his love.

"I love you, Donna… I honestly don't know what I'd do without you," he confides.

"Well you're stuck with me in this tiny bed. I'm not leaving." she smiles. Donna knows what those words mean to Harvey.

And with a gentle press of her lips to his, she seals that promise. Harvey exhales and lets his body relax into hers.

"And as for feeling loved…," she adds, her grin widening now. "I know you'd have sex with me, even if I had a shower cap on... If that isn't unconditional love, then I don't know what is."

Harvey chuckles as turns off the bedside lamp.

With a tender kiss goodnight, he says,"… And that offer will always stand, Donna."

xxx

After breakfast, and after the men head out for the kids' swim lessons, Donna and Lily make their way to the park trail. Dressed in yoga capris, a white tank, and sneakers, Donna can already feel the heat of the day building.

Between last night's heart-to-heart with Harvey, and the distance with Lily, she's feeling out of sorts. Fresh air is just what she needs.

I've always loved a good nature walk," Lily says, a water bottle in hand and a sun hat on her head. "Bobby and I go three times a week.'

"It's nice to have this park near your house," Donna states. Harvey told her to be herself, but she's not being her talkative, colourful self, opting, instead, to choose her words carefully.

"We've only been here a couple of years, but it feels like home," the elder woman adds. "It's nice to have enough space for family gatherings, like this weekend."

"My father's in Connecticut, my mother in Florida and my sister, Joy, lives in California. So these kinds of family gatherings are rare for me," Donna replies.

"I had no idea your parents weren't together," Lily says, glancing at the red head. "Maybe that's why you and Harvey understand each other so well."

"One of the reasons, perhaps. We've talked about it over the years." Donna agrees, cautious to say too much.

"You've known each other quite a long time, haven't you?" The elder woman asks. "Marcus and Gordon mentioned you a time or two."

"Thirteen years, actually," Donna replies, sensing Harvey has told her little about his work life. "I was his secretary until last year. Gordon called the office quite often. I really liked him."

"He was a good man, a good father," Lily agrees, relaxing her pace as they both grow more at ease with the conversation.

The women continue to make small talk as they walk past the giant oak trees that shade the path. Eventually, the trail takes them to a pond with park benches along its bank.

"Why don't we sit, Donna." Lily suggests, gesturing to a nearby bench. Donna follows, curious and a little anxious as to what Harvey's mother might have to say. Until now, Lily has been pleasant, but not overly welcoming.

"I see how important you are to Harvey…," Lily begins, "and now that it's just the two of us, I need to be honest with you."

"Of course," Donna replies. Her stomach is in knots, but she offers her best theatrical take on a "relaxed" expression.

"I must confess, I've had mixed feelings about you coming this weekend." Lily's candour startles Donna, she's not sure how to respond.

"Well, I hope your feelings are leaning towards the good now," she says with wide eyes and optimism.

"They are…" Lily assures, offering a slight smile. Donna exhales in quiet relief.

"As you know, there have been years where Harvey and I haven't spoken… and not a day goes by that I don't regret how I hurt him," Lily admits. "For much of that time, you've been part of his life, and I haven't. That's been a bitter pill for me to swallow…"

The elder woman scans the pond long enough to allow her to organize her thoughts. "I do feel grateful, Donna… that he's had someone as lovely as you to be there for him."

With her hands tucked on her lap, Donna nervously glances at Harvey's mother, uncertain as to what to say. "Thank you, Lily."

"And thank you for encouraging Harvey to come to me. You've helped him and that's also made a big difference in my life." Donna can hear the gratitude in Lily's voice. "I know he's a grown man, but he's my son. I don't ever want him to be alone, and pay that price, because of what I've done."

Her lips pressed together, Donna nods to acknowledge the elder woman's heartfelt words. But she senses that's not why they're really here.

"But… I'd be less than truthful if I didn't admit that I've also felt… jealous, envious… of you." There's a quiver in Lily's voice now. "You've been there for parts of his life that I know nothing about. Seeing you together, it's clear how close you are… it reminds me of how much I've missed. How I've failed as a mother."

This is why Lily has been so guarded, Donna realizes.

Donna takes in the raw emotion on Lily's face now, a mix of sadness and remorse. She reaches to comfort her with a hand to her arm. "I understand… I would feel the same way," she empathizes. "I know we can't change the past, Lily, but I'd like to think this weekend could be a fresh start for all of us."

"I'd like that very much… I'm sorry I haven't been more welcoming. It's not anything you've done. You're lovely, Donna, you really are." Lily says, slowly exhaling her words. With emotions running high, the two women turn away to watch a flock of ducks flapping across the pond. Then, Donna, once again, focuses her gaze on the elder woman.

"Lily, I think I need to be honest with you as well," Donna begins. If she and Lily are going to be in each other's lives, they both need to make a clean start.

"Ok," she replies, tilting her head exactly the way Donna has seen Harvey do hundreds of times.

"I've also had mixed feelings," Donna confesses. "I wasn't sure what to expect when I got here, and how I'd feel about you, too."

Harvey's mother nods, encouraging her to continue.

"I know all about the past, and there's a side of me that's always been very protective of Harvey," Donna admits. "I was afraid this weekend would stir up the hurt he's felt, and maybe set him back."

"I understand," Lily complies. "And how do you feel now?"

A tiny smile forms on Donna's mouth. "Good… and Harvey's good. I've appreciated your honesty, Lily. It means a lot. And, I think, after that dinner last night, we're all going to be just fine."

"It was a nice evening, wasn't it?" Lily smiles back as she reflects on the wonderful conversations that were had. "And I can't believe you two went up the Eiffel Tower twice in two days!"

"That Paris weekend will go down in the history books, that's for sure," Donna chuckles, the twinkle returning to her eye.

Lily turns to her once more. "Can I ask one more thing?"

"Of course," Donna obliges.

"As you know, prying anything out of Harvey is near impossible… Can you tell me some things that I may have missed… Things a mother might like to know?"

There's still a deep sadness in Lily's eyes that pulls at Donna's heart. Those years apart from Harvey have clearly been painful for her. She's pretty sure Harvey doesn't even realize the hurt his mother has experienced.

"I most definitely can." Donna senses that she and Lily have finally turned a corner.

"Well… he's an amazing lawyer," she begins. "One of the best in New York. Everyone thinks he's a tough guy, but I know better. Harvey would never admit it, but he's taken care of a lot of people over the years, including me and others at the firm."

Seeing that the elder woman is hanging on to every word, Donna takes a chance on being more personal, and showing more of herself.

"You think women love clothes, Lily? Well, Harvey and his suits…," Donna starts, her eyes wide in mock disbelief. "They're tailor-made and he has 30 of them, all hanging by color in his closet. I've never met anyone so organized. Every dress shirt is monogramed and he's meticulous about polishing his shoes," she chuckles and dramatically rolls her eyes. "Then there's his hair… don't touch his hair."

"Yes… I remember the hair," Lily giggles. "That started in high school."

"Did you know he has 10 Harvard t-shirts? All exactly the same." Donna makes her point with palms open towards the elder woman. "He gets one every year for donating to his alma mater, and he refuses to give any of them away… Yet, I apparently have too many pairs of shoes. But at least they're all _different_!"

Lily is now openly laughing at Donna's good-natured ribbing.

Donna furrows her brow, and then asks, "Did Harvey ever tell you about hiring Mike Ross?"

Lily shakes her head, "No".

"I'll leave him to tell you that story one day, but he did something that surprised even me. He took a chance on a young troubled kid, hired him, and changed his life for the better."

"Really?" Lily's eyebrows jump with surprise. "Harvey always liked to do things his own way."

"Believe me… he definitely did that," Donna adds. "Mike and his wife run a legal clinic in Seattle. They met at the firm, and we're visiting them for the long weekend."

"That's wonderful!" Lily states. "What kind of man would you say my boy is… outside the office?"

A blush rises on Donna's face. "He's a pain in the neck, Lily." Donna giggles.

"Same as always then," Lily laughs back.

"Except, he's the best man I know." Donna admits, her face giving away her complete adoration for Harvey.

"He would never want anyone to know how deeply he feels things, but he does," Donna continues. "He's kind and generous and principled… and I trust him completely."

"And I know he feels the same way about you," Lily compliments. "He told me so yesterday."

"We haven't always gotten along, but we've always found our way back," Donna says, proud of the bond she and Harvey have built over the years. "And I would take a bullet for him."

"Yes, I sense that he's as much your _someone special_ as you are his," the elder woman suggests.

"I'm not sure what you mean," Donna replies, a little confused at Lily's choice of words.

"When Harvey first came to see me, I asked him why he did, and he said _someone very special_ to him had encouraged him," Lily informs.

Hearing that, Donna takes a breath, and with glassy eyes, looks directly at Harvey's mother. "Lily… I love your son, I _really_ love him… I guess that's what you need to know."

"That's _exactly_ what I need to hear," Lily responds, placing her hand on top of Donna's.

" Lily…" Donna adds, "There's something else I'd like you to know."

"What is that?" the elder woman asks.

"Although Harvey was absent from your life for that time, don't think for a second you were completely gone from his," the red head explains. "For as long as I've known him, he's kept one of your paintings in his office. Always where he can see it… you've been with him."

Tears pool in Lily's eyes, and she can hardly contain her feelings. Leaning across the bench, she wraps her arms around Donna, embracing her in a warm hug.

"Thank you," she whispers, sniffling. "You have no idea what this means to me."

"I do. You're his mother," Donna states, as she feels her own eyes getting wet. "You should have seen how things went down between Harvey and my father!"

The two women sit on the bench for a few minutes longer, while Donna details the evening Harvey met Jim Paulsen.

After everything Donna has heard about Harvey's mother over the years, she has a new-found respect for her. Lily took the time to explain her feelings, caring enough to be honest with the woman in her son's life. Donna can't imagine a better start to their relationship.

"Ok, Lily, are you ready to hear more because I'm just getting started," Donna giggles, as they head back on the path. "Did you know Harvey puts vanilla in his coffee…? He only has one plant, it's a cactus… Was he into bagels as a kid? Because that's all he ever eats for breakfast… "

"Oh, Donna," Lily says, affectionately placing her hand on the red head's arm. "I think we're going to have a lot to talk about."

xxx

After the children's swim lesson, Marcus heads to the change room, leaving Bobby and Harvey alone on the pool deck. Except for a handshake, Harvey has made every effort to avoid the man he blames for breaking up his family.

"I want to thank you, Harvey," Bobby begins, trying to break the ice of their very frosty relationship.

"For what?" Harvey leans back in his seat, legs extended, his arms protectively crossed…and his eyes locked straight ahead.

"For making your mother so happy this weekend," he says. "She's been over the moon since you called her about coming."

"Good to hear." Harvey's response is curt. He's trying to get over this thing with Bobby, but all he can picture is his mother and Bobby in his parents' bed. Then the feelings rush in – confusion, anger, guilt and… hurt.

"Look… I know we'll never be friends but…" Bobby replies.

"Never." Harvey interrupts.

"Ok… then I'll just say this… I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the hurt that I caused you." Bobby's voice is hushed, but sincere.

"You're _sorry_?" Harvey challenges. His eyes stay firmly fixed on the pool, because he's afraid what might happen if he looks Bobby in the face.

"I've apologized to your father and to Marcus, and now I'm apologizing to you," he says. "It was wrong what happened and there's no excuse for the hurt it caused." Bobby waits for a reaction from Harvey.

Silence. So he continues.

"But you also need to know… I love Lily a lot, and I won't apologize for loving her for all these years. At one time, I tried not to, believe me, I tried. But you don't get to choose who you love."

More Silence. Then…

"No, you don't… But you can choose how you handle it," Harvey disputes, his tone flat.

"You're right," Bobby replies. "I guess not all of us are capable of that inner strength."

"I guess not," Harvey mumbles.

Bobby huffs, sits forward in his chair and leans on his elbows. "She's not alone and unhappy, Harvey. I've taken good care of your mother, and I've been there for Marcus and the kids, too. That should also count for something."

Harvey presses his lips together and tenses his jaw. He swallows down the bile rising in his throat.

 _Lipschitz said to breathe through it._

Closing his eyes and with a deep breath in, he thinks of his mother, Marcus and the kids. Then with an exhale, he visualizes last night's dinner and Donna and the future. He made a promise about Christmases, Thanksgivings and babies. And he doesn't want to go another ten years without family.

 _Bobby isn't worth losing all that for_.

"I'll be honest… I don't think I'll ever completely get over it, Bobby. You have no idea how it's affected my life,' Harvey utters, as he feels a rash of heat spread across his chest. "But for my sake I need to move past this, and if it makes my mother happy, I'll try. Donna and I want family in our lives."

Bobby nods. "Well that's all I can ask… and, Harvey, the door will always be open."

Harvey nods, and then he forces out words he never imagined would ever leave his lips.

"Thanks for your apology, Bobby. I appreciate it."

Just then, Marcus and the kids make their way across the pool deck. Seeing the children with their wet hair and goofy smiles, Harvey instantly feels lighter. It's time to move on.

 _Bobby is definitely not worth it._ He thinks.

xxx

It's midday, and Donna and Harvey enjoy the last few hours of their visit before heading back to New York.

Harvey, Marcus and Bobby are playing backyard baseball with the kids, while Lily and Donna prepare a light lunch for the family.

With the hot summer sun radiating above, the group gather under the giant striped awning to enjoy platters of homemade biscuits, salads, cheeses and deli meats. This time, the atmosphere is more relaxed so the conversation is even more spirited.

As everyone sips their lemonade, Lily returns from the kitchen carrying the beautiful cake platter that Donna had gifted her. It's stacked with the selection of delicious Manhattan pastries.

Donna is deeply touched by the gesture, and catching Lily's eye, she smiles, only to have Lily return it. They don't need words.

 _Welcome to our family, Donna._

"According to Donna, this pretty cake platter is for family celebrations," Lily explains to everyone. "And after this weekend, I think we have a lot to celebrate."

The children jump out of their seats to hover over the sweet treats.

"I think we should start a tradition," Hailey suggests, as she licks the chocolate off her fingers.

"What kind of tradition?" Bobby asks.

"When Uncle Harvey and Aunt Donna visit, they have to bring a dessert to put on the family platter," she explains.

Smiling, Harvey winks at Donna and mouths the words, _Aunt Donna.._.

Donna catches her breath at the young girl's words. This is Harvey's family. This is her future and she couldn't be happier if she tried.

"You know what, Hailey, I think that's an amazing idea," Donna replies to the agreement of the group.

Clearing his throat, Marcus raises his glass. "I'd like to propose a toast. To new beginnings and new traditions."

"…And to family." Lily adds.

"…And dessert!" Henry cries.

xxx

With their luggage neatly stowed in the Aston Martin, all that's left are the goodbyes. This time, it's warm hugs all around.

Lily gives Donna an extra-long hug. Whispering in her ear, she says, "You're an important part of Harvey's life and I'm so glad you're now part of ours."

"Me too," Donna whispers back.

With brotherly pats on the back, Marcus and Harvey continue their teasing. "Good seeing you, Harvey. But I think I like Donna better," Marcus kids. "Don't be a stranger."

"Yeah, I like Donna better, too," Harvey volleys back.

With a hug, Marcus thanks Donna again for her offer of the suit. "I'll let you know what happens with Samantha."

"Just have fun," she advises, giving Marcus a peck on the cheek.

Wrapping his arms around Donna, Bobby thanks her for coming. "Something tells me you're going to take this new tradition very seriously."

" I sure will, there'll be some amazing desserts in your future," she promises with a wink.

Lily holds Harvey in a long motherly embrace. "I love you Harvey. You and Donna, you're good for each other. Don't let her go."

Harvey soaks in her words. "Thanks, Mom. I won't."

Bobby and Harvey settle for a handshake, but this time, Harvey reaches first.

"Thanks for everything, Bobby," he says. "We'll be back." And he means it.

Bobby nods. "Looking forward to it, Harvey."

As the car backs away, Donna rolls down her window to ask a question of the children. "So… what will it be next time? Cherry pie or Chocolate cake?

"Chocolate!" They both yell.

"Chocolate cake it is!" she says as she waves goodbye.

And with that, Donna and Harvey begin the long drive back to Manhattan. This time, Harvey doesn't bother with the scenic route. He wants to get home as soon as possible. He feels more settled than ever and can't wait to take the next step with Donna.

For the first few minutes of the drive, the couple sit quietly, each lost in their own thoughts about the weekend. Although it didn't unfold quite as Donna had expected, she feels more confident than ever about Harvey, and their future together.

Harvey hoped that this weekend would give him clarity, and it did. And not just about Donna, but about family and what it's worth to him.

"What are you thinking?" he asks.

"That I'm pretty much the luckiest girl on the planet," she says, stealing a kiss on his cheek. "I like your family."

"And they like you back," he smiles. "We're two for two on great weekends... You ready for what's next?"

"I am," she says, her eyes twinkling with anticipation. "If it's between a condo and a brownstone…. definitely a brownstone."

"How did you know that's what I was going to ask?"

There's never been a day when she hasn't surprised him.

"Oh, that's right, you're Donna," he remembers. "A brownstone it is."

\- The End -


End file.
